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I sit at the edge of camp in Rob's arms, kissing him deeply. I didn't know what I was doing, why I was doing this. I was with Keenan, I was going to lose my virginity to him and yet I was making out with his friend?
After a few moments I stop. “What are we doing?”
He looks at me. “I'm sorry?”
I sigh. “I'm with Keenan.” I tell him and he blinks a few times.
“Really?” He backs up right away. “Oh man, I'm really sorry. I had no idea... So it's you and Keenan and her and Peter?”
“I thought you would know that.” I groan and then stand up. “God, I'm sorry... This is awkward.”
“Yeah. You're telling me.” He sighs. “I just saw my friend fucking some random girl, and then made out with my other friends girlfriend. Think it's awkward for you.” He looks at me. “Why the hell didn't you tell me you were with him?”
“Because I don't know if I'm actually with him.” I say and he sighs.
“What does that mean?” He asks, not even looking at me anymore.
“I just mean... We just met. I barely know who he is.” I say and lean against a tree, really wishing Kristy and Peter would just hurry up. Break up the awkwardness. “I don't know if we are actually together, or just messing around in the forest. I don't know how he feels.”
He groans. “Don't tell me you guys have been fucking each other too. Please. Spare me having to hear that.”
“I haven't. We haven't.” I say. “We've done stuff, but that doesn't mean we're together. Or I don't know if it means that. I don't know if it means anything.”
“Well it depends on what you did.” He says. “Don't tell me what, but if you've gone further then kissing, then I hate to say it but you two are together.” He tells me, still avoiding eye contact. “Peter! Get the fuck over here!” He yells, standing and walking away from me.
I felt really bad, not only for kissing him while I'm together with Keenan, but also for hurting Rob. He was a nice guy and I just totally turned him down. Well, not only did I turn him down, but I made out with him a little bit first. I didn't know what I was going to do, I could hide it from Keenan, but then Rob could tell him. Or I could tell him and he could freak out on both me and him.
I look at Rob and take in a deep breath. “You aren't going to tell him, right?”
“Or course not. He will either kill me, or pity me. Rather avoid both of those.” He says as he digs through a first aid kit, getting a bandage to put on Kristy for our cover story. “Just like I wouldn't tell anyone that we saw Peter and Kristy having sex. It would only get me killed.”
Peter and Kristy walk back, their clothes all messed up. Once they see us she sighs. “Don't tell anyone.”
“We won't.” He says and then passes her the bandage. “Put this on your finger, they think you're injured.” He says and then starts to walk.
Peter sighs. “Dude, wait up.” He says and then runs after him. I sigh and start to walk with Kristy. She looks at me.
“What's with him?” She asks.
I sigh. “Nothing. Tell you back at camp.” I say as we start to walk. “And seriously? If it was anyone except for me and Rob, you would have been caught.” I mutter.
She sighs. “I'm sorry, but we couldn't wait.” She says and shrugs. “Just tell me what happened with you and Rob, it's obviously bothering you.”
“Nothing happened with Rob.” I say and she raises an eyebrow. I sigh. “I kissed him. Or, he kissed me, and I kissed back.” I admit.
“I thought you were with Keenan?” She asks and I nod.
“I told him that and he, understandably, freaked out.” I tell her. “You can't tell anyone.”
She smiles. “I won't.” She says and then looks at me again. “You aren't usually like this.” She says and I nod.
“I know. I usually don't even think about boys too much. But... I don't know. Keenan has me going crazy.” I say.
“Rob too?” She asks and I shake my head.
“Not as bad as Keenan. I like him, but not in that way.” I say and look ahead at Peter and Rob. “How do you feel around Peter?” I ask her.
She tilts her head. “What do you mean?”
“I just mean... Whenever I look at Keenan I feel weird. I know I've only known him for a few days, but I feel super happy when I see him.” I say. I wasn't sure how I felt around Rob, but certainly not the same. It was more just a comfortable feeling. “So how do you feel around Peter?”
She sighs. “I'm not in love with him. He's awesome, and I am really into him, but... Not overjoyed when I look at him.”
I nod. “Well what if he feels differently?”
“Then I don't know!” She groans. “Why are you asking me all of this?”
“I don't know.” I sigh. “I'm just... Curious I guess. I mean, how do you really think sex has no emotion attached to it?”
“Sex is all about pleasure. You don't need to be with someone you love. I mean, think about it. People have sex with random people all the time, it doesn't mean that they're doing a bad thing. I think that there are two different kinds of sex, there's the kind where you want to make a baby, and the kind where you want to feel happy.” She shrugs.
“What if Peter was to have sex with me?” I ask and she groans.
“What?” She asks and I shrug.
“If sex has no emotion, then you shouldn't mind if he fucks anyone he wants.” I say and she sighs. “If you really don't love Peter, then he should be able to fuck me and you should have no problem with it.”
“I'm not in love with Peter. And I wouldn't want him sleeping with you because you're my best friend, and you want to go with Keenan, or Rob, or whoever you want to sleep with.” She looks at me. “Some people are fine with cheating. Just get over it.”
I sigh. “I can't. I mean, I kissed Rob and I feel horrible about it. Why can you be so... Normal about it?”
“Trust me, my view on things isn't normal. What you feel is normal.” She says and smiles lightly. “You'll get over it.”
I nod. “Thanks.” I say. “By the way, you owe me big time.”
She smirks. “You can go meet with Keenan tonight, I'll take tomorrow.” She says and I laugh and walk over to the groups of scouts and guides, sitting next to Keenan.
I wanted to tell him what happened, but I couldn't throw Rob under the bus like that. He technically didn't know we were dating, so it wasn't his fault that he kissed me. I didn't want to feel guilty, but at this point there really wasn't a sure way to get rid of my guilt.
But I also didn't want to lose Keenan. I liked him so much, and if he knew Rob and I kissed he could leave me all together. I knew it wasn't fair to lie to him, but I couldn't think of a better way to deal with it.
“Took you guys long enough.” Keenan smirks and I smile.
“Well, shit happens.” I shrug, still keeping my distance from him. “We can meet tonight.” I say in a voice barely above a whisper.
He looks at me and nods. “Same place?” He asks and I nod. “Alright.”
I nod and then look at where Peter and Kristy sat. They were doing a better job at keeping their distance, Peter now sitting closer to Rob. I wanted to go say something, but I wouldn't know what to say.
Some of the kids call for us and we run down, knowing I could talk to Keenan tonight, if I was going to tell him anything.
* * * * *
I snuck out that night, leaving Kristy in the tent. We hadn't talked anymore about what happened, I just wanted to ignore it. I knew I was making too big of a deal about everything. It was just a kiss, it wasn't like I fucked him and I wasn't telling Keenan.
I was still thinking about Keenan a lot, more than I had thought about anyone else. Keenan was the guy.
I walked out to the clearing where Keenan was already standing. I walk over and smile. “Hey.” I say and then kiss him deeply.
It felt different kissing Keenan, it felt right. Not that kissing Rob felt wrong, just different.
He looks at me and smiles. “Hey Eliza.” He says and then moves some hair out of my eyes. “You okay?” He asks me and I nod.
“Better now that I know we are actually together...” I say and then kiss him. “So... Are we actually doing this?” I ask quietly.
He nods. “Yeah... Only if you want to.” He adds quickly.
I nod. I wanted to be with him, have sex with him, lose my virginity to him. It seemed stupid, I know it was stupid. Really stupid. It was a forest, I just met him, and we had no protection. As far as I knew. But I wasn't thinking straight, the thought never crossed my mind that I was being stupid.
I smile lightly and then kiss him, both of us sitting down on the cold ground. I kiss him deeply, slipping my tongue into his mouth, straddling his hips. I reach down and start to rub his crotch area, feeling the growing bulge in his pants. I didn't need a whole lot of work, I was wet the minute I found out we were meeting tonight. He still rubbed my pussy through my pants, kissing me deeply and pulling me close to him.
I stop and then climb off of him for a moment, taking off my pants. I strip my panties off along with them, as he unbuttons his pants and takes them off with his boxers.
I look at him and start to stroke his cock slowly. He moans lightly, being already rock hard.
We were both ready to do this, physically. I was still on edge, it felt so weird. I would have moments of clarity where I tried to talk myself out of what I was about to do. Then I would get back into the mad frenzy of just wanting to impale myself on his cock.
I got back into the mindset that there was no one in the entire world except for us.
He turns me onto my back and kisses me as he rubs my clit lightly. I rubs his cock against my entrance, making me shudder and moan.
“Be gentle...” I whisper and he nods and kisses me.
“Of course.” He says as he pushes against my pussy.
He pushes into my slightly, I fidget uncomfortably, but I try to not let him see me. Not wanting him to stop, even though it felt weird. The head of his cock pushes into me, he moans softly and kisses me.
“I love you so much Eliza...” He says and then pushes a little further, his cockhead pressing against my hymen, the barrier not letting him in. “This is going to hurt.”
I nod and then look at him. “I trust you.” I whisper as he pushes a little further.
I feel my maidenhead give under the pressure as a burning sensation runs though me. It was very painful, I can't help but let a few tears pour from my eyes. He kisses my forehead, staying in the same place.
I had a slight moment of clarity in this moment, that I was being insane. I was having sex with a guy I just met, we weren't being safe, I was going to get pregnant, or we were going to get caught. Something horrible was going to happen and it was because I was being stupid. This wasn't love, this was lust. I just lost my virginity to a guy I just met.
But then he kept asking me if I was alright, every time I looked at him and saw the concern on his face, I knew he cared. Maybe this was right.
After a couple of minutes I look at him. “Keep going...” I say quietly and he nods, moving slightly further into me. After a bit he got his entire cock into my tight pussy, and I started to get used to the feel of him being inside of me.
He starts to pump in and out of my, both of us groaning. He takes it slow, being careful with me. There were no sounds in the forest, only the sounds of us moaning, skin against skin. His balls hitting my ass every once in awhile.
I felt myself getting closer and closer to an orgasm. It felt like we were together for hours, an eternity, when it was probably more like five minutes.
My whole body started to shake, the most intense orgasm of my life shook me. As he pumped in and out of me I felt a river of cum leave my body and coat his cock, making him go slightly faster.
He took in a deep breath as he sped up just a little bit, riding out my orgasm as he gets closer to him. I lean up and kiss him deeply as he shuts his eyes and kisses me back. I felt his cock throbbing inside of me.
Then he released, cumming into my pussy, jamming his cock as far into me as he can. He cums deep into me, pumping the last of his jizz inside of me, making me moan.
He pauses and looks at me, both of us panting and moaning. After a few minutes he removes his hard cock from my pussy and looks at me.
“I love you so much Eliza. I have never done anything so perfect with someone so amazing in my life.” He tells me and kisses me deeply as we both start to get dressed. I could still feel his cum inside of me.
“I love you too Keenan.” I tell him and do up my pants. “We can see each other in two days.” I tell him and he nods.
We kiss one last time and I turn to go back to my camp, walking back towards my tent.
I wasn't a virgin. I lost it to Keenan.
It felt like the most amazing moment in my entire life.