Gender: Male Age: Secret Location: N/A
|Introduction: Chapter 3 of meeting Sgt. J|
The Judgment of Sgt. J Chapter 3: The One Who Could fix Skates
Kay here before I begin chapter three I would like to thank everyone for their support. The first two chapters were about a troubling time in my life. It seemed I made a wrong decision at each turn of my life during this time. I placed myself in jeopardy as well as my daughter Sherri.
I will never forgive myself for the choices I made back then. Those choices will cause me regret for the rest of my life. I should never have placed my daughter in harms way as I had. She was just an innocent little girl who would never harm anyone. Because of me, her early childhood was pure hell instead of full of fond memories of her younger years.
My daughter tells me she has forgiven me but I cannot help but think that it is only due to the man who is about to walk into our life. That being Sgt. J the man I call my husband and the one she calls daddy. For without him I would have lost more than just my daughter.
I have some advice to any person facing abuse today. You are better than that. It is not your fault and it is damn well not your duty to take the abuse. I tell any women today who are facing what we faced to get out while you still can.
I do not know why Joe did not shoot Sherri and I that day as he had sworn to me he would. I can only think that one of us had an angel watching over us that day. It had to be my daughter’s angel, for I am unworthy of protection from above as I had made her childhood a living hell for her.
To my daughter I say I understand that no matter how many times I say I am sorry it will not wash away all the hurt nor the pain I caused you nor the tears I made you cry. Maybe someday you will open your heart and know I never meant to hurt you I was only protecting you.
Chapter 3 “The One Who Could Fix Skates”
I had lunch with Cathy until our afternoon classes began. I sat beside John looking over his notes. I had one more class left for the day. I walked into it I did not see John so I took a seat. As I sat down John came in the door.
He walked over to me and laid a stack of notebooks down as he said, “Here Kay,” “These are my notes from all the classes even this one,” “You can copy them and give them back when you are finished.”
I told him thank you as he sat down beside me. As John sat down, he once again came close to me as if he smelled my hair again. I was beginning to think I smelled or something. When class was over John stood up and he looked at me.
“Would you like to join me and my buddy at the local tavern?” John asked me with the most wonderful smile on his face.
My eyes went from that wonderful smile of his to the gold ring on his finger as I replied, “Thanks John but no thanks.”
John’s smile left his face as he said, "I understand,” as he hung his head and walked from the classroom door.
I almost called him back as I thought I might have hurt his feelings. However, why should I care about a married man’s feelings after what Jack did to me I thought. I grabbed my books as well as his notebooks and went to my new piece of shit car.
Cathy came up to me and she said, “Come on with me and I will introduce you to Rod.”
We got into Cathy’s car as hers ran better than mine did. We drove only a couple blocks to some tavern. As we drove Cathy told me I would like Rod as well as his friend.
“Cathy, I appreciate the thought but…” I replied before she cut me off.
“Rod tells me his friend is very cute and nice,” Cathy said.
“So you never met him,” I replied.
Cathy shook her head no, as I thought great another blind date. Cathy parked the car and as we got out, I told her maybe I should go home. She grabbed my arm and dragged me up to door. A tall blonde hair man met us at the door. He took Cathy into his arms giving her a kiss deeply onto her lips. I was a little jealous, as those should be my lips on hers.
Cathy broke their kiss as she said, “Kay this is Rod.” “Rod this is Kay.”
“Hi Kay hey I know you well I mean your in a few of my classes,” Rod said to me.
The three of us walked into the bar. I looked around and I saw there were some from our college as well as a few bikers sitting at the bar. I walked behind Rod and Cathy trying to hide myself in case I knew any of the bikers.
We walked to a table and I heard Rod as he said, “Cathy, this is John,” John this is Cathy.”
Damn it Cathy I told you he was married I thought as Cathy said, “Nice to meet you John and I think you already know my girlfriend,” pulling me out from behind Rod.
“Hi John,” I said smiling at him.
John stood up smiling as he pulled a chair next to him for me. The four of us sat down and we talked. I only told Rod and John that I was divorced and that I had a nine-year-old daughter. Rod told me he was divorced and that he hoped to have kids someday as he wrapped his arms around Cathy pulling her against him.
I was waiting for John to claim he was divorced as well as I sat there looking at the ring on his finger. John did not say anything. I placed my hand onto his as it lies on the table. I picked it up as I showed Cathy the ring on his finger.
“I see you’re still married,” I said smartly to him.
“I lost my wife three years ago in a car accident,” John replied pulling his hand from mine. “I just never removed my ring,” he added as he looked away then back at me.
“You must have really loved her to wear her ring still,” Cathy said to John.
I felt like a total idiot, as my plan was to expose him as a man cheating on his wife. The hurt and sadness I saw in his eyes told me he spoke the truth about losing her. I felt so sorry for him and I had no idea what to say to him however, a saying popped into my head suddenly.
I touched my hand to the side of John’s face as I said, “To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die,” as I gently rubbed the side of his face.
John’s face went white and I thought I saw a tear starting to form. John excused himself telling us he had to get rid of the beer he had drunk. He walked away from the table with his head down heading for the bathroom. Rod got up to get us all some more beer.
Cathy took my hand into hers as she said, “That man once loved someone deeply with his heart.” “Who ever she was she is now an angel in his eyes.”
“Some girls pick good men while I pick bad ones,” I replied.
“Stop it Kay just have a little fun,” Cathy said. “I mean you don’t have to marry him,” Cathy added with a little laugh.
The four of sat for another hour talking nothing serious just talk. Cathy and I finally told them we had to be getting home. Rod gave Cathy a kiss and John stood up sticking his hand out to shake my hand. I shook it as I told him bye.
During the next few weeks, John and I became friends. John helped me to catch up in all my classes. He even gave me his phone number and told me if I was stuck on something to give him a call any time of the night. I normally would do my schoolwork late at night after Sherri and my mom were in bed.
If I were having trouble on some schoolwork, I would call and talk to him on the phone. There were times when I called that I know I had awaken him from his sleep. However, John never complained he just helped me to the answer. He would never give it to me just tell me when I had gotten it right.
I would look into this man’s eyes during school and I became bewildered by what I would see. Sometimes those lovely eyes would sparkle and shine. Other times they grew darker than night itself. I was not for sure but I believe I saw evil in his eyes as well. I decided it was best if we just stayed friends.
“One day during school I think it was March or April,” I said to John as he typed.
“It was April Kay,” John replied “But go on it is your story,” he added.
I smiled on my insides knowing that he remembered that day. I went on with one day in April. The four of us were sitting around during lunch. John told Rod he had just gotten his income tax check.
I looked to John as I asked, “So when are you taking me for dinner,” smiling at him.
“Anytime you would like to go,” John replied. “How about Saturday night?” He then asked.
I had only really meant it as a joke. However, John stood there looking at me waiting for my answer. I stared up into those eyes of his. I looked deeply into them. I tried to read them however, I could not and he was waiting for my answer.
“I would love to John and you can meet my daughter Sherri,” I said smiling at him.
John did not say anything back he only shook his head yes and smiled at me. Later in the week, John asked me if it was OK if we went somewhere fancy. He told me he would wear his three-piece suit as I had told him I loved a man in a suit. I told John that would be fine and I would even wear a dress for him.
I had one small problem with telling him that. I did not have a dress to wear for him. All my dresses and outfits I had left behind in Colorado and I saw no need to replace them until now. Therefore, that meant I had to go shopping.
The other problem I had was money Sherri had just turned 10 and I used what extra money I had to buy her new wheels for her skates. Cathy loaned me some money then her and I went shopping. I should have went alone as all the dresses she kept telling to try on looked like the slut wear I used to wear.
“Cathy, did you not once ask me if I was waiting tables or hooking?” I asked with a smile.
“I now I was just trying to see that you get lucky that’s all,” Cathy replied with a little laugh.
I decide on a nice little flowered print dress. It came down to just above my knees. That would show enough of my legs but not all the way up to my ass. The dress was low cut enough that it would show the right amount of tit as well.
Saturday night came and nothing seemed to go right. I could do nothing with my hair, my nylons had runs in them and the shoes I tried on hurt my feet. I was sitting on the edge of my bed getting ready to call John and tell him to forget it that I was sick or something. Sherri came into my bedroom.
“What is wrong mommy?” Sherri asked me.
“I am a disaster and John my date will be here shortly,” I replied.
“Is he the one you talk to on the phone late at night?” Sherri asked.
“Yes, but how did you know that?” I asked her.
“I saw you when I got a glass of water,” Sherri replied. Sherri hung her head then she asked, “Do you like this man?”
“We are just friends as I am afraid I am not his type,” I replied to her.
“Is he a good man or a bad man mommy?” Sherri asked me.
I had to fight my tears as I replied, “I am pretty sure he is a good man but I will let you decide.”
Sherri gave me a little smile as she hurried from my bedroom. I left my tears go when she did. I cried because I was not for sure whether he was good or bad. For some reason I could not read this man’s eyes. I dried my eyes and looked into the mirror great I just ruined my eyes as well.
“My granddaughter tells me you need my help,” Mom said to me from the doorway.
Mom came over and she started to fix my hair as I redid my eyes. Mom had my hair done in no time and it looked lovely. I heard a knock at our door.
“Shit, that will be John and I am not even dressed yet,” I yelled in panic.
“You finish getting dressed, I will handle him I am sure he puts his pants on the same way any man does,” mom said as she left to answer the door.
I peeked out from in the hallway in just my bra and pantyhose to see my mom let him in and sit him upon the couch. I also saw Sherri looking at him from the kitchen and she was backing away. I took that, as she did not approve of John.
I was sitting at the edge of the bed when my mom walked back in as she said, “You did not tell me he was that handsome.”
I looked up to her fighting my tears as mom asked me, “What is wrong Kay?”
“I am scared,” “I like this man but I worry what may happen if I open my heart to him.” “I can endure my own pain but I do not want my daughter to endure anymore hurt,” I replied.
My mom hugged me and she gave me comfort something I should have gave to my own daughter when she needed it. However, I do not remember ever doing it. Mom told me it would be OK.
“It’s just dinner child, your not running away getting married,” Mom said to me. Mom smiled at me as she asked, “Your not are you?”
I broke our hug as I heard Sherri as she asked, “Sir could you fix my skates?”
I heard John reply, “If you tell me your name.”
“My name is Sherri, now could you fix my skates,” Sherri replied to John.
I must have had a panic look on my face because my mom told me to finish getting dressed she would deal with Sherri. I slipped into my dress and then into my high heels. I adjusted my dress so it showed some tit but not a lot. As I opened, the door to go out I heard.
“Thank you so much,” Sherri said happily.
I also heard my mom as she said, “Sherri you leave her mom’s date alone and go play.”
“So you are John,” Sherri said as I left the bedroom.
I walked into the living room and John stood up from the sofa. He stood there staring me as I walked toward him. I saw him checking my legs out so I gave a little spin. When I did, the dress flared out showing that all I had under it were my pantyhose. I pushed it back down as I continued toward him.
My god my mom was right this man was handsome. John had worn a tan colored three-piece suit. His large 6’ 1” muscular frame looked leaned and toned in it. His medium cut blonde hair styled neatly on his head. He had a golden tanned face from working outside as he did. I dare not looked to his crotch for I would have wet my pantyhose. When I got to him, he handed me flowers.
“You look lovely,” John said to me smiling as the blue in his eyes sparkled.
I took the flowers and I smelled them as I replied, “You don’t look bad yourself.”
I took John’s hand and walked him into the kitchen where I told him to take a sit. I looked for a vase to put the flowers in and I found one high on the top self. I looked to John and he was already standing up and reaching up to get the vase. He handed it to me and he sat back down.
I placed the flowers into it arranging them. Sherri came skipping into the kitchen climbed up into John’s lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and she gave him a kiss on his cheek.
“Thanks John for fixing my skates,” Sherri said to him. My little girl then tilted her head to the side as she looked into John’s face as she added, “You going to marry my mom.”
“SHERRI,” I yelled as Sherri slipped from his lap laughing and skipped out of the room. “Sorry about that you never know what kids are going to say,” I added letting out a little laugh myself.
“That’s OK she is a sweet girl,” John replied smiling to Sherri who was peeking at him from around the corner.
John asked me if I was ready and I told him I was. We walked to the front room where we told my mom bye. Sherri came in and I bend down giving her a hug and a kiss as I told her to be good for grandma.
Sherri wrapped her arms around my neck squeezing me tightly as she whispered into my ear, “He is a good man, mommy.”
I stood back up fighting my tears, which only became harder to do. Sherri went to John’s pants leg and she tugged at it while looking up to him. She curled her little finger back and forth motioning him to come down to his level. She whispered something into his ear.
However, I could not hear what. John walked me to his truck and opened my door for me. I could not tell you the last time a man had done that for me. John got in, he told me where we were going, and I just nodded my head. As he drove, we talked about school but I was thinking and wondering just what Sherri had whispered into his ear. I had to know what she had whispered into his ear.
As we pulled into the restaurant and parked I finally asked, “John what did my daughter whispered into your ear?”
“Sorry, I can not talk of secrets shared with a sweet little girl like her.” “For I follow a code,” John replied as he looked at me smiling.
When John looked at me, I got a good look into those lovely eyes of his. His blue green eyes twinkled and gleamed. His eyes filled with what looked like happiness and joy. The kind of look Santa Claus would have after giving a child their most wanted gift. If he had been fat and dressed in a red suit then he would have been Santa Claus who had just given a sweet little girl her best Christmas gift ever.
I smiled at him as I said, “I understand.”
Which I thought I did however, I wondered what this code was he followed. Once inside and at our table, I filled with fear, as I did not know what to say to John. I wanted to tell him how he might have just filled a dream come true for my daughter Sherri. That thought entered my mind as I looked to the table before us. I noticed three forks and I looked to John.
John held one of the forks up as he asked, “Any idea which one we are supposed to use?”
“You know I was thinking the same thing,” I replied giving a little laugh.
We ordered dinner and over dinner, John asked me to tell him a little bit about myself. I explained to him I had been married twice and both times were complete disasters. I told him how both of my husbands were abusive to me as well as to Sherri. However, I did not go into the details.
John did not say much other than his eyes seemed to go sad when he heard me tell him Sherri had faced abuse as well. I looked at him as I asked him to tell me about himself. I looked deeply into his eyes as he replied.
John explained how he lost his wife and their unborn child. His eyes filled with true sadness as he told me. Mine filled with a tear that he wiped with his fingertip. He went on to tell me about the construction company he owed. His eyes told me he loved his line of work as I stared into them.
I had to look away from his eyes as I saw a man I knew walking behind him. The man was a client of Jack’s. I rather hid my face from him while looking away from John. When I turned, John looked deeply into my eyes and I had to turn away once more before he saw my look of shame. I finally looked at him as he told me that was about it as far as his life went.
I stared deeply into his eyes. His eyes seemed to explode with fire then turn black. I knew that look one of I am hiding something. My mind filled with all the abuse I had taken from Joe. I grew weary of the man sitting across from me. However, as we talked more I felt at ease with him once more. The night ended with John taking me home.
John walked me to my door and he took my hand and he kissed my hand lightly then said, “Thanks for an enjoyable evening Kay,” as he turned and walked to his truck.
“Would you like to come in for a night cap?” I asked.
John did not reply he just kept walking away until he got into his truck and drove away. I did not even see him look at me as he drove away. I stood outside my door wondering why he had not answered me. I unlocked the door and walked inside thinking maybe John did not even like me. I walked in to see my mom and Sherri sitting on the sofa.
Sherri jumped up and she asked, “Where is John?”
“He had to get home,” I replied I did not have the heart to tell her he did not like your mommy.
Sherri hung her head down as she said, “Oh I see,” as she walked to the kitchen toward her room. Sherri stopped at the doorway to the kitchen and she looked at mom and I as she added, “Good night grandma,” “Good night mommy,” then hung her head as she went to her room.
My mom looked at me as I sat down beside her she said, “That little girl waited up to tell that man thanks again for fixing her skates.”
I started to cry as I replied, “That man wants nothing to do with us.”
I explained to her I had asked John to come in but he had just walked to his truck and drove off never looking at me. I told my mom he had not even kissed me good night instead, he kissed my hand. I did not feel bad for myself but for my daughter who had thought John was a good man.
I busied myself around the house Sunday trying to take my mind off John. Maybe it was because no man had ever just taken me out for a normal date without putting me in the back seat. It could have been I was just hurting because I had failed my daughter once more.
Sherri was quiet for most of the day. She even turned down to go skating when I asked her if she wanted too. I had to check to see if she was sick, for she never turned down a chance to go skating. It only made me feel worst than I already did and then it angered me.
“Why must men be the way they are,” I said to myself.
Later that night Sherri got ready for bed and I went in to tuck her into her bed. I watched as she got ready for bed and I could see she was still sad. She climbed into bed and I asked her if she had said her prayers already. Sherri got back out of her bed. She knelt down onto the floor bringing her closed hands in front of herself.
“Four corners around my bed, four angels around my head.” “1 to watch,” “1 to pray,” “2 to take my soul away.” “Bless grandma, bless mommy and bless John that man who fixed my skate,” Sherri said into her closed hands with closed eyes.
I fought back my tears as I heard her say her little prayer. She climbed into bed and I tucked the sheet under her chin. I leaned down and kissed her forehead as I told her good night. I was going to tell her we would probably never see John again however, I could not do it.
I cried myself to sleep that night. My daughter wanted this man John for some reason and I could not give her what she wanted. I should have just lied to him about my life telling him it was good and I had just walked away from my husbands still friends with them. Maybe I should have just jumped his bones on the way home and had my way with him.
I woke up the next day getting Sherri up and ready for school as well as myself. I thought about not going to school today as I did not really want to see or face John. I had figured he would not even talk to me anymore. I was surprised to see Sherri full of joy and happiness over breakfast.
“Why so happy today?” I asked her.
“An angel told me last night that today was going to be a good day,” Sherri replied before jumping from her chair and running to her room.
I did not question her, as I did not want to ruin her day. I saw her off to school and got ready myself for school. I drove to school and Cathy was waiting for me in our usual meeting place in the lunchroom. I had no sooner sat down in the chair.
“So how was he?” Cathy asked me.
“I have to pee,” I replied running to the bathroom so she would not see my tears.
I composed myself the best I could and when I walked back to our table. I saw John standing behind Cathy talking to her. I walked up to them and John looked to me.
He smiled at me as he handed me a single red rose and he said, “For you Kay, thanks for a wonderful time,” then walked away from me.
“Dam girl you must have been very good,” Cathy yelled at me.
I smelled the rose as I replied, “That just it I was good as we did not do anything and he only kissed my hand.”
“Well you must have done something right,” Cathy said smiling at me.
Cathy told me she thought that man has a place in his heart for me. I explained he was just being friendly that was all. A man like him would want nothing to do with me. I grabbed my books wrapping them in my one arm and walked to my first class smelling my rose. I walked into still smelling the rose John had given me.
The teacher looked at me and he said, “A single rose I believe someone is in love with you.”
I walked over to where John was sitting. He did not look up to me as I got beside him. I smelled my rose once more then I leaned down and kissed him lightly on his cheek.
“Thank you John you are so sweet,” I said to him before sitting down next to him.
After school that day, I asked John if he would like to come over and study together at my mom’s house. I was hoping he would say yes, as I wanted to make Sherri happy. John told me he would and but he had to make a quick stop then he would be there. Sherri was playing in the front yard as I pulled in the driveway.
I got out of my car and she looked at me. I reached back into my car and I pulled that single red rose out smelling it again. Sherri came running over and she stopped in front of me looking up at me. I held the rose down telling her to smell it.
Sherri smelled the rose then she asked, “Who gave you a rose mommy?”
She answered her own question as she saw John pulling into our driveway, “JOHN,” Sherri yelled as she stood there.
I had forgotten how lovely my daughter was with a smile on her face. When she saw John pull in her face light up and her smile went from ear to ear. She stood there beside me as we both watched him walking up to us. John had something behind his back as he walked to us. He bent down to Sherri’s level as he pulled a stuffed bear from his back.
John handed it to her as he said, “A little something for you princess.”
I fought back my tears when I saw her face brighten even more and her smile double in size. No one had ever given me a single rose after a date and no one had ever given my daughter a stuffed bear or called her princess before then. I wiped my tears that had come from my eyes as I heard Sherri thanking John then she looked at me.
“Don’t cry mommy it is a good day,” Sherri said as she skipped into the house to show grandma her stuffed bear.
John walked over to me and he asked, “Kay, Did I do something wrong?”
“No John you done everything so right,” I replied smiling at him.
John stopped typing on his keyboard as he wiped at his eyes. I touched his hand with mine as I asked, “Did you get some dust in your eye?”
“Something likes that Kay now on with your story,” John replied.
In the weeks following being with John, I was doubting if John even liked me as sometimes he seemed to pay more attention to Sherri when he came over to study than to me. I did not mind really, as John made her happy and she was always smiling when he was around. It was not as if I was his girlfriend or anything we were just classmates.
I was not truly sure of my feelings toward him as well. I loved the fact he gave happiness to my daughter. However, I had needs as well; like sex.
I dated other men twice. Well I would not even call them dates I would call them fucks. It was John’s fault everyday of sitting by him as well as going for a beer after classes had my pussy twitching and I needed some cock.
To make matters worst my daughter had me already married to this man. I was getting ready to go out Saturday night with a man named Robert. He was taking me to the drive in movie. He had told me there would be no reason to dress up so to just wear something comfortable.
I slipped on a pair of short shorts that had my butt cheeks hanging out of them with no panties. I slipped a low cut red tee shirt with a black push up bra under it. I had just finished dressing when Sherri walked in my bedroom.
“Your not going out with John are you mommy?” Sherri asked.
“What makes you ask that?” I asked in return.
“Because you dress nicely for John not like a …” Sherri replied before she ran.
“SHERRI ANN,” I yelled as I ran after her.
She made it into her bedroom before I did. She slammed the door and locked it. I asked her calmly to please let me in I wanted to talk to her.
“Go away mommy,” Sherri replied through her door.
“Sherri honey, John has his life as I have mine,” I said. I wanted to explain that I did not think he even liked me.
“Go have fun mommy I am safe in here,” Sherri replied.
I walked into the kitchen sitting down in a kitchen chair. I had lied to Sherri just as I had lied to John earlier in the week. He had asked me if I was doing anything, this weekend and I told him I was going to go with my mom to see my aunt. I told him I would be gone all weekend.
The reason I had lied to him was that I could see he was falling in love with me or was in love with me. He was just to shy or scared to tell me. It was just as good for I was not in love with him. I liked him and I loved the fact he made Sherri happy however, I was not in love with him.
I could never love again for if I did the abuse would start again. I had it in my head that the men in my past were good men and they had turned bad when I loved them. If I took no love from a man nor gave or showed any back then not only was I safe so was my daughter.
I had it in my head that both Mark and Joe were my fault. I had caused them to beat me. I deserved it, as I was a bad person as well as a bad mother. All the men in my life had treated me poorly so that was what I was used too and I accepted it.
I sat there thinking that even if John did love me it would never work. He was high class, smart and good-looking. While I was a struggling single mom, with no class, but I was good looking I would give myself that. There was also the fact of what I saw in his eyes sometimes that troubled me as well. That man was hiding something and I was afraid to find out what.
I saw Robert pull into the driveway and I went outside, as I did not want Sherri to say anything to him. I got into his car and we drove to the drive in. I cannot remember the movies playing that night however I was not there for the movies anyways.
Robert was at me as soon as the movie started. He wrapped his arm around me pulling me into him. His lips touched mine and we kissed. It was a good kiss not a great one. His hands went to my tits as we kissed. He rather manhandled them through my tee shirt.
I lifted my tee shirt over my head. Robert kissed and licked at my tits as they spilled over the push up bra. He leaned me forward as his hand went to my bra clasp. Robert fumbled with it for some time before I finally reach behind myself and undid it for him.
“Lovely big tits made to suck on,” Robert said as his mouth attached itself to one of my tits.
As Robert suckled on my tit, I was thinking of what my daughter had told me about how John would not like how I was dressed. Robert went from one tit to the other however, my mind filled with thoughts of my daughter as I thought she had meant to say John would not like you dressed like a whore.
“Kay, are you OK?” Robert asked.
I had not even noticed that he was no longer sucking on my tits. I just smiled at him as I ran my hand across his thigh to the hard cock sticking up in his jogging pants. I rubbed my hand on it as I kissed him.
I broke the kiss smiling as I replied, “I was just enjoying your mouth on my tits.”
I lowered my head to his lap and I pulled his jogging pants down to find he had a pair of boxer shorts on as well. His hard cock was sticking out the opening in them. Robert’s cock was just average not to big and not to small. He had the kind of a cock made for all my holes.
I wrapped my hand around his cock pumping at it as I stuck my tongue out licking at the head of his dick. I was flicking my tongue around his dickhead when I felt his hands going to the back of my head. Robert pushed my head down more onto his cock.
“Suck it bitch,” Robert said as he did.
My pussy twitched when he called me a bitch. I took his cock into my mouth and sucked at just the head of his cock. I then worked my mouth up and down on his cock sucking at it hard on my up strokes. Robert was pulling my hair as my head bobbed up and down on his cock.
My pussy was throbbing and getting wet as he did. I started to think I was one sick bitch to be getting horny from him forcing my head up and down his cock. All thoughts soon left my mind as my horniness took over my body. I was enjoying him treating me roughly, as I sucked at his cock.
Robert had one hand on the back of my head as his other pinched and pulled at my tits. I was bobbing my head faster up and down his cock as he did. Robert pinched my nipple hard as he pushed my head down onto his cock forcing it all into my mouth.
“Take my cum you bitch,” Robert yelled.
I sucked hard at his cock as I felt it throb then twitch as it's shot cum splashed against the roof of my mouth. Two or three short blasts somewhat just rolled down my throat with ease. I pulled my head from his cock licking at cum around the head of his cock. Robert pulled my head from his cock by my hair. I licked at some of his cum that had dribbled from my mouth onto my lips.
“Dam your into sucking cock,” Robert said.
I did not get a chance to reply before Robert’s hands went to my tits pushing me back toward the passenger door. He grabbed my legs and lifted them to the seat. His hand went between my legs forcing them open. His hand went to the crotch of my short shorts.
“Damn woman your pussy has soaked your shorts,” Robert said.
His hands went to the waistband as he pulled them from me. He had to slide my high-heeled sandals from my feet before he removed my short shorts. He smiled when he saw I had worn no panties. His hand shot in between my legs as his fingers dug at my hairy pussy. He slipped one then two fingers up into my pussy.
“AHhhhhhh,” I moaned softly as I leaned against the car door.
Robert fingered my pussy for a while then replaced his fingers with his tongue. He licked wildly at my pussy as my hands went to the back of his head. I was pushing his head into my pussy as I bucked my hips upward. He was about to make me orgasm.
“Eat me, make me cum, JOHN,” I screamed without realizing I had screamed John’s name.
Robert poked his tongue faster and deeper into my pussy. He removed his tongue from my pussy flicking it against my clit. My clit swelled and throbbed as a short powerful orgasm raced through my body. My pussy even gave a quick little squirt before I came back down to earth. I left go of Robert’s head as my orgasm ended.
Robert removed his head from between my legs wiping at my juices around his mouth as he asked, “So who is John?”
I asked him what did he mean and he told me I had screamed that name when my pussy squirted. I told him that he was just a friend that was all. Robert gave me a funny look and he slipped his cock away as I pulled my short shorts back up my legs and over my butt. Robert handed me my bra and my tee shirt, which I slipped on as well.
Robert started his car and he drove me home the first movie was not even over yet. Neither of us said a word as he drove me home. He pulled into my driveway and placed his car into park as he turned to me.
“Kay, you’re a wonderful woman with a great tasting pussy as well as a damn good cocksucker,” Robert said. “However whoever this John is or was he is still in those lovely blue eyes of yours.”
“Sorry Robert,” I replied as I got out of his car.
I walked into the house and into my bedroom. I sat down at the edge of my bed and cried into my hands. I cried because I had enjoyed Robert calling me names and treating me roughly. I cried also because as he did I was thinking of John that was why I had screamed his name.
I was unsure of just what I was feeling toward John, in a way I wanted him and then again I wanted him to stay away from me for fear I would fall in love with him. I looked up to find Sherri standing in my doorway. I wiped my tears as I looked at her.
Sherri had no emotion as she said, “John would not have made you cry,” before she walked away.
I realized then that maybe I had more feelings toward John that I was willing to admit. I kept telling myself not to fall for this man or any man. They will only bring harm to yourself as well as to your daughter. I started to hope he would ask me out again and if he had, I was going to fuck the hell out of him.
John never did he kept our relationship at just being friends. When Cathy would come over, she kept asking me if John and I had done anything yet. I kept telling her he does not even like me.
I even tried dating another man again. His name was George and I had gone to school with him. I ran into him at the store one day. I was walking up the store’s aisle when he bumped into my cart with his.
“Sorry, Kay is that you?” George asked me.
“Yes, it is,” I replied.
I remembered George from in school he had been a jock and the other girls flocked to him. The head cheerleader Lisa had even married him. I asked him how Lisa was.
“She left me last year for another man,” George replied hanging his head.
I felt sorry for him in away and my thinking became a little confused. He asked if I was single and I told him yeah that I was. He asked me to go out with him the next night. I told him Ok even knowing it was a school night. At school, I told John I was going out with a girlfriend that night and we would not be able to study together.
This time around, I dressed in blue jeans and a low cut top that showed the girls nicely. I was getting ready after sitting with Sherri after school. She came walking into my bedroom.
“Are you going out tonight?” She asked.
“Yes I am going with Cathy that is all,” I replied not telling her the truth.
Sherri smiled and she told me to have fun before she left. I hated to lie to her however, I was finding out I was good at doing it to both her and to John. I finished dressing and left as I had told George I would met him somewhere. This was at a bar in the next town over that way I hoped not to have John see me out that night.
George and I drank and talked. He explained he always had a slight crush on me during school. He said that to me staring at my tits. His crush was more like lust than anything else was. This was fine with me as I was horny almost in heat. Some how our talked turned to sex with both us telling the other it had been a while. We left the bar and George had me follow him to his place.
He took me inside his place and straight to the bedroom. We stood by the side of his bed kissing and undressing each other as we did. George was only 5’ 6” or so which seemed strange to me at first as all the men I had been with were men much taller than me. We both were soon naked and climbed into his bed.
George lay at my side kissing my lips slowly working his way down my body. He kissed and licked at my ears and neck before he moved to my breasts. He ran his tongue around my nipples before flicking his tongue across them. They grew hard at the tongue-lashing they were receiving.
George trailed his tongue down my body climbing between my legs that I parted letting him between them. He gently rubbed at my hairy pussy telling me he loved the hairy ones. George parted my pussy lips with his fingers gently kissing and licking at them.
“AHhhhh George,” I moaned.
His use of his tongue on my body had gotten John far from my mind. He kissed then licked at my pussy lips before he buried his face into my hairy pussy. His tongue drove my pussy wild as I flopped around on his bed. I actually had a couple pleasuring orgasms from his tongue.
I lifted his head from between my thighs as I said, “Fuck me George give me your cock,” sexily.
George climbed on top of me and he rubbed his cock at the entrance of my pussy. His cock was average in size and it felt good as he slipped it into my pussy. George fucked me slowly then placed my legs up onto his shoulders. He fucked me deep and hard with his balls slamming against my asshole.
“YES fuck me,” I screamed out as pleasure coursed through my body.
George started to kiss me as he drove his cock deeper and faster in and out of my pussy. I was enjoying and loving the fucking he was giving me. It was just a nice enjoyable fuck almost like with the clients of Jack’s.
“Ohhhh Fuck Kay,” George screamed out dropping my legs from his shoulders.
He pulled his cock from my pussy taking it into his hand. His hand pumped wildly at his cock as I looked at it. His head went back and his eyes went closed as cum spewed from the head of his dick. The first blast landed on my hairy pussy as the next three splashed across my tits.
“AHhhhh,” I moaned as I rubbed cum into my tits and my pussy.
George leaned over and kissed me then rolled next to me. He told me that he had enjoyed that and it was has he had thought about. I turned to him as I rubbed my hand at his chest. I was thinking that was some good sex. I was also thinking how he had not been rough with me and just how much I had enjoyed it.
Maybe just maybe George was a good man I thought as I lie there with him. The phone rang and he answered it. The image of him being a good man left me as he did. Whoever was on the other end of the phone he screamed and cussed at filled him with anger?
“Fuck you Bitch,” “I don’t gives a rat’s ass,” George said into the phone. “The next time I will blacken both your fucking eyes,” he added.
I slipped from his bed and got dressed. I left myself out of his house with him still arguing with whom ever on the phone. I was shaking as I drove home. I had almost gotten myself into something I did not want.
I went home and climbed into bed thinking it did not matter all men were evil. I also convinced myself that John was not like those men simply because he was not interested in me like that. After all, we were just classmates not lovers or anything. I was just happy he was bringing a little joy into my daughter’s life even if I knew it would not last.
For the next couple of months John and I hung out together. We studied together and went down for drinks after school. We held hands sometimes but he never tried to kiss me. I wanted to kiss him so badly however I thought that maybe he was the type that did not like to kiss or something.
While I was looking forward to him taking me into his arms and kissing me, as well as taking me to bed, I did not press the issue. I thought that maybe this man was just shy. It really did not matter to me for this man was doing one thing right.
Anytime this man came over to our house he always made sure he came baring a gift for Sherri, mostly a stuffed bear and she loved getting them. While John was not really making me happy because of not kissing me or engaging me in sex it did not matter. This man was making my daughter smile and that was all that mattered to me.
One day after school as he walked me to my car as another car backfired. John’s eyes filled with hate and anger as he froze suddenly. His closed hands formed into fists as his body tensed up as he just stood there. His eyes seemed to be searching all around him. I heard him saying something almost in a whisper. It was in a foreign language I had never heard it almost sounded like Japanese.
I panicked and jumped into my car. I looked through my window at John as he stood there as if he was ready to explode or something. I slowly rolled down my window and I reached out touching his arm. His eyes stopped searching and his body relaxed as I did. He looked down at me in my car with sorrow in his eyes.
“I have to go Kay,” John said as he turned and walked away from my car never looking back.
I started to think all types of bad stuff. I wondered what this man was hiding. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. I never asked him about that day, as I was afraid of what he would tell me. It also just reaffirmed what I had thought. This man was not my knight in shiny armor he was just another man ready to bring harm to me as well as my daughter.
John did not come to school the next day nor did he answer his phone when I tried to call him. The next day he came to school and he looked tired as if he had been up for the last two days. I asked him if he was OK.
John took my hand as he said, “One day at a time-this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering,” as he tilted his head to me.
I knew not what his words meant but they seemed to put my mind at ease over him. John seemed to be himself and it soon slipped from my mind. A few days later, I ran to the store as I pulled into the parking lot I saw John standing beside his truck. He was talking to a lovely attractive girl who was not afraid to flaunt what she had.
They talked then the girl wrapped her arms around him. She gave him a long embrace as I made my mind tell me they were just friends. That was until she kissed him. It was only a quick kiss but that was more than I was getting from him. To make matters worst I swear John looked right at me before I drove away. It troubled me but I was too afraid to ask John about what I had seen. I was afraid because I did not want to see my daughter unhappy again.
John had given me his home phone number as well as his private number to his company in case I ever needed him. A couple of days after seeing John and that girl together my dam car would not start so I called him at his construction company.Some girl with a lovely as well as very sexy voice answered his phone.
“Is John there?” I asked shyly not knowing who this girl was as he told me no woman worked for him.
When John got onto the phone I asked, “John would you tell me who answered your phone in your office?”
John did not saying anything and I knew he was searching for something to say then he replied, “Just a friend.”
“I see that you are busy so I will not trouble you again,” I said in a rather pissed off voice before I hung up on him.
I sat there thinking you bastard just like all the other men in my life. You had a girl on the side that was why he never kissed me or tried anything. How was I ever going to explain to Sherri that the man who called her princess was just a scumbag?
About five or ten minutes later the phone rang, it was John. He was asking me to forgive him for not telling me the truth. He explained the girl on the phone and at the store the other day was Terri his deceased wife’s cousin.
“I wanted to tell you I know you saw me with her however it is a little hard to explain,” John said to me.
“John, you don’t own me any explanations.” “But it was sweet of you to think that you did.” I said to him. “I was just having some car troubles and I was going to ask you to look at it but I will just call the garage,” I added.
“I would be happy to come over right now to look at it if you will let me,” John replied.
“If your not to busy,” I replied to him.
I hung up the phone feeling somewhat better and it stopped my crying. His explanation sounded real and not rehearsed. However, I still had some doubt about him. I turned to see Sherri standing there.
“Was that John?” Sherri asked
“Yes it was,” I replied. “He is coming over to look at my car for me,” I added.
Sherri did not have to say anything her face and eyes told me as her smile grew. She ran along to her room and I sat in the living room talking to my mom. I told her John has gotten under my daughters skin. She adored him and was always happy when he was around.
“So what is the problem daughter?” Mom asked me.
“I do not know if I can trust him or even if he likes me,” I replied.
“Maybe he feels the same way,” mom replied.
I had not thought about that until now. I sat there thinking about him losing his wife. A woman he must have loved dearly to still wear her ring. Sherri came out joining us on the sofa. I thought of the pain he must have felt losing a daughter he never held in his arms. It came to me that maybe John was connecting with my daughter over losing the daughter he never knew.
My thoughts stopped as John knocked at the door. I left him in and saw flowers in his hands. How sweet I thought he brought me flowers.
John entered and he walked over to my mom and handed her the flowers as he said, “These are for you.”
“For me,” mom replied. She looked toward me as she added, “You better move fast on this one before he gets away,” as she smiled at me.
John pulled a teddy bear from his back as he said, “And this is for you young lady,” handing Sherri the bear.
My daughters little face light up with joy as she replied, “Thank you, John.” She looked to me as she added, “Look mommy I got another bear.”
I stood there looking at my mother, as she smelled her flowers a lovely smile on her face as she did. I watched Sherri hugging her bear and smiling up at John. I looked to John waiting for my gift.
John turned to me as he said, “As for you,” “You get the use of my skillful hands,” showing me his hands.
“Now that is something you better not pass up,” mom yelled with a laugh.
“MOM,” I yelled back.
The three of us had a laugh, as I did not think he had meant it as it had sounded. John took my keys and he went outside to check on my car. I looked out to see him working under my car then I heard him leave and return in his truck. I looked again to find him back under my car. In a few more minutes, I heard my car start up and I went outside to John. He told me I just needed a new starter and he had ran and got one for me.
“How much do I owe you for the starter and your time?” I asked John.
“Nothing, you do not owe me anything,” John replied.
“John I can’t let you…” I managed to get out of my mouth.
John pressed a finger to my lips lightly as he said, “You owe me a dinner only this time I want you to cook it,” as he smiled at me.
“That’s a deal,” I replied wrapping my arms around his waist giving him a hug.
I placed my head against his chest as I hugged him tightly with my arms wrapped around his waist. My body got warm and my pussy started too tingled as I did. I wanted to take him right there in the driveway. I should have jumped on my car and parted my legs from him. However, I did not instead; I walked him into the house then into the bathroom so he could wash his hands. I wiped tears from my eyes as I walked back into the living room joining mom and Sherri.
Sherri walked toward the bathroom. I was going to stop her however; my mom said something to me from her chair. I sat down on the sofa as Sherri came skipping back into the room. She slipped up onto grandma’s lap.
“Just what are you up too?” I asked.
“Nothing mommy,” Sherri smiled.
John came walking into the living room and Sherri slipped from her grandma’s lap and went to John taking his hand as she said, “You sit here John,” placing him beside me.
She walked back to her grandma and took her hand as she said, “Come on grandma we will watch TV in your room,”
They both smiled as they walked away. John reached over and he took my hand into his. He started to explain about the person who I had seen him with and the one who answered his phone. He told me she was just checking up on him, as she had not heard from him for a while.
I placed my finger to his lips as I said, “I believe you John, your eyes are telling me you spoke the truth.”
“Speaking of eyes,” “Care to talk about yours?” John asked.
“It shows that much,” I replied turning from him.
John turned my face toward his as he said, “Sometimes it helps to talk about it,” as he stared into my eyes.
I looked into those lovely hazel eyes of his. They were almost hypnotic as peace and calm came over my body. I actually saw trust in his eyes as I stared into them. I decided to tell him about the abuse Sherri and I faced at the hands of not one but both of my husbands. I explained how they both mistreated us and how we had barely gotten away from my second husband.
“I do not know if I can ever trust a man again or if I even want too,” I said to John as tears ran from my eyes.
John wrapped his arms around me placing my head to his shoulder. I cried wildly into his shoulder as he held me. I felt a caring embrace as he held me. I felt his hand rubbing at my back.
John whispered lightly into my ear, “Let it go Kay, let it all out as I just hold you in my arms,” “Cry all your fears away,” “Close your eyes and open your heart,” “I am here and no one will ever harm you two again.”
I only sobbed harder hearing him tell me those words. I know they were just words but words I had never heard in my life. My crying went to a soft sobbing as he held me. I felt at peace with myself in his arms.
I felt John kiss my ear then he whispered, “Hush, hush my love or the creatures of the night will get you.”
I pulled my head from his shoulder as I asked, “What did you just say?”
John looked into my eyes as he replied, “Never mind,” as he brought his lips to mine.
As his lips touched mine, I slipped my arms around his neck. I returned his kiss deeply and with passion. I kissed him fully as church bells, fireworks and the National Anthem played in my head. I slipped my tongue into his mouth. Our tongues toyed with each other as he kissed. I felt light headed as I broke our kiss.
“Would you like to do something else,” I asked.
“Let’s hold off on that let me just hold you for now,” John replied pulling my head to his shoulder.
I cried into his shoulder once more. No man had ever shown me this much compassion. I had never felt like this while a man held me. It was a feeling I had never had before. John rubbed at my back as he told me everything was going to be OK.
“Thank you John you’re so understand,” I said placing my head onto his chest.”
“You are unlike any man I have ever known,” “You made me cry earlier tonight when you gave my mom flowers and Sherri that bear,” I added.
“I know Sherri told me I made her mommy cry but that they were happy tears,” John replied rubbing at my back.
“SHE told you John,” “That girl sure does like you,” I said lovingly to him.
John sat with me most of the night. I talked to him about my fears as well as my daughter’s fears. He assured me that neither my daughter nor I need fear him. I wanted to believe this man unlike any other man in my life. However, something deep within me told me, “Trust not his words.”
I looked to John behind his desk as I said, “I think I had a monster within me back then like you did.”
John thought for a second before he replied, “You had no monster within you, Kay” “You built your wall so high that no one could climb it not even I.”
“Go on with your story Kay it is not time for a break yet,” John added
When it came time for John to leave, I walked him to the door. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him down to me. I kissed him deeply not out of love but out of thanks. I opened the door and as he walked out the door.
“Good night John and good-bye,” I said to him.
John stopped and he turned around and he came back to me. He took a hold of my hand with his. He placed his other hand over top of mine.
“I tell you good night Kay but I will never tell you goodbye for goodbyes are forever,” John replied as he patted my hand then walked to his truck.
I wanted to yell, “Please don’t go spend the night with me,” however I closed the door and went to my bedroom alone.
A few days later, I told John to come to dinner at 6 o’clock. I had invited Rod and Cathy as well. Six o’clock came and everyone was there except for John. I started to worry and think he was not coming when the clock read 7 o’clock.
The phone rang and I answered it. It was John and he told me he had lost track of time at work. He told me he would run home take a shower before coming here. I told him to come over as he was. He explained he was dirty and sweaty.
“I will know you have been working then,” I said to him on the phone.
Fifteen minutes later Sherri came into the kitchen and she said, “John just pulled in then pulled back out of our driveway.”
“It must have been someone in a truck like his,” I replied.
“IT WAS JOHN,” Sherri said angrily to me before she ran back into the living room.
Cathy looked to me as she said, “She really thinks the world of John doesn’t she.”
“Too much and I am afraid she will only be hurt when he is no longer around us,” I replied looking to the floor.
“Kay you have to give the man a chance,” Cathy said to me.
“What a chance to hurt me,” I replied looking at the clock.
About twenty minutes later, I heard John pulling up in his truck. I met him at the door and I asked him if he was here a little bit ago. Sherri was standing beside me as I did.
“Yes, I turned around because of you,” John replied squatting down to Sherri.
“Why did I make you turn around?” Sherri asked John.
“Run out to the front seat of my truck and you will find out why,” John replied.
I watched as Sherri ran to his truck. She opened his door then climbed up grabbing something. She turned with a stuffed teddy bear almost the same size as her. She struggled to carry it as big as it was. However, the smile on her face was bigger than that bear.
“JOHN, you went all the way back into town just to pick her up that bear,” I said to him.
“I had too I saw her looking out the window when I pulled up and in my rush to get here I forgot to get her a bear,” John replied smiling at me.
Sherri came walking in with the bear showing it to me as she said, “Look mommy it is bigger than I am,” as she handed it to me smiling from ear to ear.
I held her new bear as she walked over to John motioning him down to her level. She wrapped her arms around his neck hugging him tightly. She whispered something into his ear. I held the bear in one hand as I wiped my tears away with the other. John looked at me and he whispered something back into my daughter’s ear. I knew not to ask what for neither would have told me.
John removed his boots before he entered the rest of the way into the house. I told John I see that he was working, as he was dirty and sweaty. I asked him if he had a change of clothes in his truck and he told me he did.
“Go get them and you can shower here,” I said to him.
“I will go get them for you John,” Sherri yelled out running to his truck.
I stood there with John waiting for Sherri to return. I was about to go see what was taking her so long when she walked back into the house. Sherri had a long sad face as she handed John his bag of clothes and walked away.
I walked John in the bathroom. I turned the shower on checking to make sure it was not to hot and not to cold. I went to the door closing it as I turned to him. John stood there just staring at me.
“Give me your clothes and I will wash them for you,” I said to him.
John started to undress as I watched him. He slipped his pants off standing in just his jockeys and tee shirt. John lifted his tee shirt up over his chest. He had a well-built chest however; a big X scar to the side of his chest caught my eye.
He turned his back to me as he lifted the shirt over his head. I saw more scars lining his back. They looked almost like bullet holes. As he turned more sideways, I saw a black faded tattoo high on his shoulder three small J’s in an angled line. I had been around many tattoos from running with bikers. I also knew gang members often wore them as well. That might explain that scar as well as the bullet holes.
John handed me his clothes as he stood there in his jockeys. I put his clothes in one hand as I held out my other hand. “Give me everything,” I said smiling at him.
John turned with his butt toward me and pulled his jockeys down as I said, “You have a cute butt.”
John turned with his manhood hanging against the side of his thigh. It was soft but was as large as some cock I had seen hard. I smiled as I looked at his cock just hanging there. He handed me his jockeys with his hand touching mine.
“So it is true big hands and a big …,” I said stopping at the word dick. “Now shower and your dinner will be ready when you are through,” I added walking from the bathroom closing the door behind me.
I took his clothes and tossed them into the washer, which was off our kitchen. I returned to heat up the dinner I had made for him. Sherri came walking in and I saw she still had that long face. I asked her if something was wrong. She just shook her head no as she sat down at the table.
I went to check on the laundry as I returned I saw John sitting at the kitchen table. Sherri was standing beside him with her eyes looking to the floor. I saw John look down to her and he rubbed his hand through her long blond hair as he asked her if something was wrong.
“There is a picture of a blonde woman, pretty like mommy in your truck,” Sherri replied looking up to John. Then putting her head down she asked, “Is she your girlfriend?”
John lifted her head up as he replied, “Yes that was my girlfriend who became my wife.” “Her name was Carrie she lives in heaven now,” as his eyes grew with sadness.
I walked over to Sherri and as I took her hand, I asked her to come with me for a second. I walked her to her bedroom sitting us both down on her bed. I talked to her about John’s lose as I was not for sure if she understood.
“I understand mommy his eyes told me,” Sherri said to me.
“What did his eyes tell you?” I asked her.
“That he loved her very much and he still misses her,” Sherri replied.
Sherri walked over and picked up her drawing pad as she told me you go be with John mommy I am going to draw for a while. I walked back into the kitchen to find Rod and Cathy sitting with John. I stopped as I entered to see Cathy staring at the X scar on the side of his chest as the muscle shirt he had worn showed it.
Rod looked at Cathy as he said, “That’s his scar from the Vietnam War.”
“I thought it was a tattoo at first as it is a perfect X,” Cathy replied. "That war caused a lot of scars,” Cathy added.
“Scars heal sometime men don’t,” John said hanging his head.
“Tell her the story John,” Rod said looking to John.
“Some other day maybe but not today,” John replied smiling at them.
The other shoe had finally fallen as I stood there. That man I was beginning to think was a saint may be the devil instead. I had been around some whacked out Vietnam veterans when running with bike clubs. That thought left my mind quickly as I looked to Cathy as I was thinking of her brother who took his own life. I never knew why however, I knew it had something to do with Vietnam.
However even that thought left my mind as I saw the look in Cathy’s eyes as she stared at John. I had seen that same look a thousand times. Her eyes filled with a wanting look. I had never felt jealous of Cathy at anytime until then.
I entered the kitchen and the four of us sat playing cards and talking. A little later Sherri came walking into the kitchen telling each of us good night. She took my hand pulling me up the back stairs to her room. She stopped at her bedroom door.
Sheri looked up at me as she asked, “Mommy could John tuck me in tonight, please?”
She shuffled her feet and bite at her lips. I was surprised at her request, as only I had ever tucked her into bed. I knew they shared something I just did not know what.
“I think that can be arranged,” I replied smiling at her.
Sherri motioned me down with her finger as she does John. I bent over getting down to her level. She wrapped her arms around my neck as she kissed me on my cheek.
“Thanks mommy, I love you,” Sherri said as she climbed up into her bed.
I turned and started to walk down the stairs stopping half way down to clear the tears from my eyes. That was the first time in a very long time my daughter had told me I love you. I composed myself and walked into the kitchen.
“John I hate to trouble you but Sherri asked if you would tuck her in,” I said to John.
I walked him to her room and left them alone as I returned to the kitchen. I told Rod and Cathy she had never had anyone but I tuck her into bed at night. Cathy reached over and she placed her hand into mine.
“He is special to her,” Cathy said to me. “As you are to me,” Cathy added with a smile.
A few minutes later John came into the kitchen. I looked up to him and into his eyes. Then Rod and Cathy did the same. There was a single lone tear forming and about to drip from his eye.
John took his finger and wiped it from his eye as he said, “Must have gotten something in my eyes.”
“Sure buddy, that’s all it was, Rod replied.
The next day John came over baring gifts. An expensive heart necklace for Sherri as well as a lovely diamond tennis bracelet for me. I told him we could not accept his gifts as they cost too much.
John took his hand and turned my head toward his as he said, “Look into my eyes Kay and tell me what you see.”
I stared deeply into his eyes as I replied, “I see happiness.”
“Happiness is priceless and that is what you two give to me,” John said wrapping me in his arms
“You make us happy as well,” I replied then added, “However I am waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
John broke our hug as we both stared into each others eyes. I saw that fire and explosion in his eyes. Those lovely hazel eyes seemed to grow dim and fade to black dots as I stared into them.
“Someday Kay you are going to have to open your eyes and your heart to me,” John said softly to me.
“I know John, I know and I am really trying,” I replied.
I reached across his desk touching my husband’s arm as his typing stopped. I looked into his eyes as I said, “Someday John you are going to have to open your eyes as well as your heart to me.”
John turned to me and without even thinking or anything he replied, ““Give away you're troubled heart so you're dreams will all come true. Give away you're troubled heart, find love inside of yourself first.”
He reached up shutting his computer down as he walked from his study. I sat there thinking about what he had said as tears once again ran down my cheeks. My heart was troubled when I had met this man and he had made all my dreams come true. However, my heart was now troubled over what was troubling his.
I closed this chapter with what I was thinking as I wiped my eyes with my own hands. It is something the man you know as Sgt. J and I as John showed me a long time ago.
“The less you open your heart to others, the more your heart suffers.”
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