Gender: Male Age: 59 Location: Rural Mississippi
|Introduction: A story of incest|
This article contains a factual account of an incestuous affair between a very young girl and her father. If this is going to upset you then don't read this. In fact you should leave this website and delete it from your history so you can't find you way back.
Chapter one: The grooming
My daughter was born with a cleft lip and palate. This caused her mother to reject her daughter because she had wanted only perfect children. She also rejected me, her husband with the words, "I don't want to have any more of your children!" so when she went back on the Pill she still refused to make love to her husband for years at a time. So the daughter and father were bound together by the mother's neglect of both of them.
So if the daughter was wet or had a dirty diaper and Daddy was home Mommy left it to Daddy to take care of. Feeding also fell into her father's responsibility since cleft children cannot nurse at their mother's breast. These things bonded the father and daughter into what would become a badly dysfunctional relationship as we will see.
On Easter Sunday my family and my in-laws attended Sunday worship as was our custom. Actually the in-laws lived over a hundred miles away but had come specifically for Easter.
When we returned home from church my son, my wife and my daughter all went to their bedrooms to get into more comfortable clothes. I stayed in the living room of our 14 X 70 three bedroom mobile home to entertain my in-laws. When my wife came out I went to our bedroom to get out of my grey business suit and into something a bit more comfortable. I had changed out of the suit and was dressed in shirt and slacks when there was a knock on the bedroom door. I called out, "Who is it?" The answer was,"It's me, Daddy" in the voice of my daughter.
Since I was decent, I said, “Come in" and she entered wearing jeans and a T-shirt. She closed the door behind her and came to where I was sitting on the bed and said, “Daddy, I have a burning itch down there." I wasn't sure where down there was so I asked her "where?" and she pointed at her crotch. I told her "Show it to me." and she obediently dropped her jeans and panties to show it to me. Looking at my baby's pussy I could see her labia were as red as her surgically corrected lip! Something had irritated that tender skin.
Since my wife had forbidden me to eat her pussy since the birth of our son eight years before my daughter was born we had been using Vaseline as a sexual lubricant and kept a jar of it in the bookcase headboard. I took out a good glob of the stuff and spread it over my daughter's pussy. I had too much for such a small pussy so I opened up her cunt and smeared it over the inside of her slit as well. This accidently sexually stimulated her, known to me only after I'd done it when I put a finger on the mouth of her vagina and found her hole to be wet!
After I'd rubbed it in and realized it had turned her on I had her pull up her panties and jeans and join her grandparents in the living room. After I put on my black oxfords and my socks I opened the master bedroom door to hear my daughter telling everyone in the front of the mobile home, “Daddy rubbed me down there and it felt good." I also heard my wife loudly calling our yet innocent child a whore and a slut.
It should be mentioned here that since the birth of our son my wife had constantly displayed considerable temper combined with distrust and extreme jealousy. I now believe she suffered from a Borderline Personality Disorder which had her falsely accusing me of multiple affairs with my son's baby sitters, waitresses in restaurants where we ate and , of course, the women where I worked. Despite all this I had remained faithful to her even though she left me no reason to be faithful.
Naturally this was yet another excuse for her to yell and scream at me as she accused me of the incestuous abuse of our own daughter. While I knew it had turned her on, I greatly underestimated the effect it would have on my daughter and I told my wife "It wasn't sexual, it was medical" Slowly but surely she understood I'd had no sexual intent so it could not be charged as sexual abuse and finally accepted my thoughts and calmed down. I thought it was over and done with, I could not have been more wrong.
Chapter two: The start of the affair.
On Wednesday night our church had programs for youth. My wife, as volunteer Christian Education Director, led these. So on the Wednesday after Easter my wife and son went to church leaving me and my daughter at home, alone. They had not been gone more than a quarter hour when my daughter came to me and said, “I need to talk to you in your bedroom." Now the board games were stored on a high shelf in the master bedroom closet, so I thought she was bored and wanted to pick out a game. A game was on her mind but it had nothing to do with that shelf. When we got to the master bedroom I turned to her and she said "Rub me down there." I was shocked! I then told her, “I can't do that, it's just wrong, besides, why you want me to do this wicked thing?" She quite calmly declared, “Because it will feel good." I then explained, "It is against the law and if I do this thing and anyone finds out Daddy will have to go away for a long time." Her reply was equally logical, “I won't tell anybody about it so no one will ever know." I reminded her of the Christian belief that God knows everything, “You will know, I will know and God will know because he knows everything and it is a sin." My daughter had a child's understanding of theology and she said, "God forgives sin, and besides I don't care about any of that, I want you to do it" !
Now my wife and I had not made love since Christmas, 1190 days ago. It wasn't that I wasn't trying, it was just that my wife had been refusing me. So I was weak in the face of temptation, sexually deprived and frustrated so I told her to bare it for me and then I rubbed her pussy slit until she staggered in her standing with her climax and then I ask her if that was enough. She nodded affirmatively and then pulled up her panties and jeans and walked out.
This became our private ritual any time we were left alone in the mobile home. Every time her mother and brother were gone she'd come to me and say, “Make me feel good." and we go to the master bedroom and she'd pull down her pants so I could rub her cunt. Each time I would rub her until she lost her balance and stagger stepped. Then she would pull up her pants and leave the room.
After two weeks of this pussy rubbing I made a decision to turn up the heat. So one Wednesday evening after I'd rubbed her rubbed her cunt slit until she stagger stepped I told her not to leave right away. Then I explained that there were things I could do to make her feel better faster. I asked her to think about letting me lick her down there because she'd feel even better. I told her not to tell me until the next time we got together to do our special stuff.
A few days later my wife took my son to the supermarket and my daughter come to me as they were pulling out of the driveway and said, “Come on Daddy, make me feel good." When we got to the bedroom I asked her, “Are you going to let me lick it?" She said, "Yes" so I told her to get naked, she took off every stitch of clothing and stood before me. I picked her up with my two hands at her waist and I set her round little bottom on the edge of our full sized bed. She laid back letting her long wavy light brown hair fan out under her head. I knelt at the edge of the bed and put one leg over each of my shoulders. I then opened her pussy with my fingers and started licking up and down her cunt. I paid special attention to her clitoris to insure her pleasure and after a few minutes I felt a shiver spread from her clit over her whole body. She'd cum. So I backed out gently laying her legs back to the carpeted floor. She got dressed and left and I stayed a few minutes to let my erection fade.
I did not masturbate because I had hoped my wife would stop the cutoff and make love to me again.
So now our seduction included kissing, French kissing, me rubbing her pussy and me eating her pussy. Since she was stripping to the skin I now rubbed and sucked on her undeveloped tits. To allow her to control what I did, she didn't like to French me, but was okay with me putting my tongue in her mouth. So her signal to move along in our repertoire was to put her tongue in my mouth.
She liked me to eat her pussy so much she'd often French me four times in one kiss telling to bypass three steps I'd normally use to get there. Every time I'd eat her I'd have a raging hard-on which was getting more and more frustrated so after two more weeks I ask her to masturbate me so I could feel as good as she was feeling. This was asked after one of our sessions. With an answer not expected until the next time we got together for sex
The next Saturday my son went to a friend's house and my wife went to do some office work at church. I slept in. I woke up when a toilet flushed which was followed by my daughter coming to my bed. She crawled in beside me and I put an arm over her. She cuddled with me for a while then asked me where Mommy was. I told her,"at church." and she asked how long. I looked at the clock and it was only 9 and Mommy wasn't due until lunchtime. I told this to my daughter and her reply was "Then we have time to make me feel good." I asked her,"Are you going to do me today?" She reached down to my briefs and started to rub my morning hard-on. I told her,"Stop, I have to make you feel good first" She said okay and pulled the long T-shirt that she used as a nightgown off over her head and threw it on the floor. She pulled her panties down and off and tossed them onyo the long T-shirt. Then I kissed her on the mouth and started feeling her flat chest. On the second kiss she Frenched me twice so I moved one hand to her pussy to work her clit while I put my mouth and the other hand on her undeveloped tits. She let me continue this way for about five minutes because we had plenty of time. Then she reached for my chin and pulled me up into another French kiss so I moved down to her mound but kept my hands busy on her nipples. She climaxed in less than two minutes. shivering from her pussy to her extremities. I came up to her face and told her, "I love you." I kissed her again and then got out of my briefs.
She reached for my organ and began to jack it with her tiny little hands. After a few minutes she changed hands because of fatigue. Then she said, "Daddy my hands are getting tired. Isn't there something else I can do to make you feel good? Now many men would have asked for a blow job at this point. I wouldn't because that activity was next, and not due for another couple of weeks.
So I asked her to lie down on her back. I straddled her midsection on my knees and laid my cock over her breast bone and began to fuck her undeveloped tits. I kept this up until I ejaculated onto her chest and neck. I then cleaned her up with a Kleenex and we got up, got dressed back into our respective night clothes and I added a robe and I went out and we ate breakfast together.
After breakfast she went to the living room and she watched Saturday Morning television. I went back to my bedroom and got clothes on. I went outside and took the power mower out of our 8' X 10' shed and mowed our lot's grass. I finished by eleven and came back in soaked in sweat. I went back to the bathroom to take a shower and to shampoo my hair. Just before I stepped out of the tub there was a knock at the bath room door. Since neither my wife nor son was due I knew it was my young daughter. I ask her what she wanted. "I got to go pee" was her response. I said go ahead. She came in and sat on the stool I finished up and came out of the tub. She goes "Daddy, did you have to come out right now?" I said,"I was done besides I saw all you have this morning." She nodded in agreement than asked "Is there time to make me feel good?" I looked at my watch and it read 11:25 AM. I said, "I think so"
I put on my robe and carried my clothes to the master bedroom; my daughter followed me still wearing her oversized T-shirt. As soon as we crossed into the bedroom she pulled it over her head droped and walked out of her panties and sat on the edge of the mattress and laid back. I knelt as I had earlier and dove into her pussy nibbling on her clit until she climaxed. As I pulled up I heard my wife's car pull into the driveway. I quickly dressed in my casual clothes and went out to meet her. My daughter pulled her oversized T-shirt over her head and pulled on and up her panties but she sdidn't pull her lovely long light brown hair up out of the neck hole. She came out of the back of the mobile home into her mother's sight showing signs she'd taken it off and put it back on quickly. She sat next to me on the sofa. I reached over and pulled her hair out of the T-shirt's neck hole and let fall over her shoulder. It was still wild since she had not combed or brushed it all morning.
So we avoided getting caught only by my wife's lack of attention. My daughter whispered in my ear, “Do you need to cum?" I told her "No, I'm fine" My wife boiled hot dogs which were served on bread for lunch with chips. Then about one thirty my son called and asked me to pick him up about 2:30. When I announced that to my wife, my daughter comes to me and whispers "If you leave now I can make you feel good." She still thought because she'd cum twice that I should cum twice too. I said "no" and that was the end of the discussion.
At least twice a week my wife and son would leave my daughter and me alone and each time this happened my daughter would ask me to make her feel good. Each time we'd start with a kiss and progressed to the point when I'd eat her pussy until she'd cum. Then she'd let me rub my penis on her nude body until I'd cum. Sometimes I did it on her chest, other times I'd have her lay on her stomach and I'd lay my cock between her butt cheeks and fuck her externally until I'd cum. This was so satisfactory that I held off in my plan to add fellatio to her repertoire for am additional week. Finally the day arrived when I ask her, again in the afterglow of her orgasm, to consider doing to my cock as I'd been doing to her pussy for seven weeks. Once again I told her she did not need to answer until we were again having sexual relations.
Even though we continued to be left alone she did not come to me so I could make her feel good. I felt she feared what I would do if she refused to accept my proposal to suck my dick. So once I went to her room and knocked on the door when we were alone in the house. I explained to her that if she refused I would continue to do what we had been doing before without any pressure to change things. She said "Okay" and I left her room and returned to the living room, put in a StarTrek video and watched it.
She did not come out of her room until her mother came home. My wife made her Hamburger Helper supper for that night and we ate supper. At my daughter's bedtime she asked me to tuck her in. So I took her to her room and put her to bed with a hug and a kiss, no tongue. This now became a daily procedure but I did not abuse her when putting her to bed. She didn't ask me to so I didn't do it.
The next Saturday my son went to a friend's house and my wife went to do the grocery shopping. My daughter asked me to make her feel good as my wife started the car. As we both stripped to the skin I ask her if she had decided to try to suck me off. She said, "I'll try it one time but if I don't like it I don't want you to think I'll do it again" I said, "That's okay."
I kissed her on the mouth and she Frenched me four times in the one kiss, counting the steps off I went down on her and ate her pussy until she shivered in climax. Now it was time to see if she would suck me and if she would stay at it until I ejaculated. So I put it close to her face as she knelt in front of me and she took my cock in her small hand and started to jack me off. When her hand got tired she put my cock in her mouth and moved up and down my shaft as I'd told her to do. She kept a tight seal around my shaft then after sucking me for a few minutes she came off my cock and said "Yuck, you came in my mouth!" Now I had not cum, this was that little drop of precum that serves to lubricate a woman's vagina. I explained all this to her then proposed that she straddle me and stoke my cock with her pussy. Since I'd explained that a man my age could cum but once for several hours so if I could cum with her pussy rubbing on my cock then I couldn't have cum when she was sucking my cock. I laid on my back and she straddled me kneeling and settled with her pussy up against my cock and she'd slide up and down my shaft until I'd cum. She did it and I shot so hard the jism actually landed on my own face. I cleaned myself with a Kleenex and we got dressed. I ask her if she'd suck me again and she said, "I will as long as you don't cum in my mouth." I immediately accepted her condition as my wife had stopped sucking my cock within the first six months of our marriage.
I really did, and still do love to eat pussy. My wife had forbidden me to do this to her after her father called our home trying to reconcile with his daughter, my wife right after she had my son, his first grandchild. According to psychologists I had in prison she connected this act to her father and that's why his call generated that prohibition. This was one reason I continued to make my daughter cum by eating her pussy from the first time she let me do it.
Now we had a sequence where I'd start by kissing her, then French kissing her, then working the nipples of her micro tits, then sucking her micro tits, rubbing her pussy slit, then eating her pussy to her orgasm, then we'd do sixty-nine until she decided I was hard enough then we'd dry fuck with outercourse until I'd cum. We'd do it anytime my wife left the two of us alone. My son had taken to staying in his room except for school, bathroom breaks, and meals so even his presence in the house was no longer an impediment to our incestuous relations.
On September 10 of this year my wife did allow me to make love to her one time. Why that day? Because it was the first Saturday after my birthday. It had been 1355 days since my last lovemaking with my wife. She was too busy and tired to make love on a work day and Sunday night was my appointment to watch Star Trek. One reason she was so tired was because of the extra weight was carrying. She'd been 162 pounds when we'd been joined in matrimony. By now she was up to 225 and was still gaining.
Chapter Four: Half day School
When my daughter was five it was time to enroll her in school. She would go to a half day of school each day in the morning and be home for lunch. Since my job was second shift teaching Electronic Engineering Technology at the local Junior College and my wife had started had started working days at the local mall we'd be alone five days a week. The first day of school I walked my daughter to the school bus stop and watched her go off to school. I was waiting for her when they dropped her off about 11:45. I walked her home and she asked me "Is mom home?" when I said no she said good.
We got back to the house and as soon as we entered she closed all the drapes in our living room and stripped off her clothes until she was naked. I hurried to match her nudity and we did our whole sequence right there on the orange shag carpet in the living room. Since we had time I brought her to climax with my finger and again while eating her pussy. Before we got onto sixty-nine she asked me if I could only cum once every few hours how could she cum twice in ten minutes? I explain she could cum as long as stimulation was applied. It was one of the advantages of being born female. She said "tomorrow I'm going to wear you out."
We did sixty-nine for a while and she shivered a third time! Then she sat on my cock and leaned forward with her hands on the floor on each side of my head. That was different. Then I noticed it put her clitoris in contact with my penis as she slide forward and backward on my shaft. Before I shot my load she shivered in climax and when I did cum she shivered yet again. Apparently once she realized multiple orgasms were possible for her she decided to let herself go. She got up and said. "I need a bath." I told her "We also need to eat lunch." She went to her room and grabbed an outfit and went to the bathroom to start a bath. I could hear the water clearly and after I put burger in the broiler I looked down the hall and she'd left the bathroom door wide opened. I went up the hall and walked into the bathroom and when I came in she stood up to show me what she had. I told her, "thank you" but explained our gas broiler would burn the burgers if I didn't turn them on time. So I left her there and return to the kitchen to turn the burgers. When they were done I yelled “Lunch is ready!" She replied, “Daddy come here." So I reported as ordered.
She was standing in the tub. I asked her, "What do you want?" She said "Lift me out of the tub." So I put a hand under each arm and lifted her out. She pulled a towel off the rack and said, "You dry me off." So I carefully dried her off then I turned to go to lunch. My daughter/lover grabbed another clean towel and arrived in the kitchen as naked as the day she was born. She put the towel on the chair and sat on it and ate her hamburger. When I finished, I picked up my plate and put it in the sink. When I turned back my daughter had moved. She was sitting on her towel on the table where my plate had been and she said, “Want to eat dessert?" I ask her, "What is for dessert?”, "My pussy." So I sat down and ate her pussy until she came and kept at it until she came again. She then got up and climbed down off the table she returned to the bathroom and was still in the tub when her brother got home from school.
When he came home he needed to go and when he realized Sabrina was in the tub I came to me. I told him to knock. He returned to the bathroom door and knocked. I heard my daughter ask "Who's there?" and he answered, "It's your brother." She replied, "Just a minute." then "Come in." He entered the bathroom and came out after about two minutes. I asked him what he'd seen. He said, "Nothing, she pulled the shower curtain." He went to his room and shut the door. After ten minutes passed she came out fully dressed.
I had to go to work so I told my son I was leaving and their mother was due home before supper time. I worked my usual shift and got home at 10:15 PM. The house was dark and quiet so I turned on the TV and caught the end of the news and then went to bed.
The next morning I asked my daughter if she wanted me to walk her to the bus stop and she said no. She walked down alone. At 11:15 AM I was down at the bus stop waiting for her. She said "Hi Dad" and we held hands all the way back to the house. We walked in; she dropped her book bag and went to the master bedroom. I followed her in and when I arrived she said. "I'll race you to naked." So I started to strip quickly but she beat me to naked. She hopped up on the bed put her butt on the edge of the mattress and laid her back flat. When I was naked and I walked up to her she lifted her legs and when I knelt she lowered them onto my shoulders It was obvious what she wanted so I dove in, mouthed her mound and ran my tongue up and down her slit as her climax approached she reached down to hold me in place so as she shivered I just kept licking her cunt and her clitoris. I kept at it without a break until she came four times. The fourth climax was a plateau and she remained in the shiver for more than half a minute as I nibbled at her clit with only my lips. When that ended she reached down and pushed me off saying, "Wait a minute I need to catch my breath after that one." So I knelt there and waited a little while she caught her breath.
She then said, "Okay let's do it some more" So I started to nibble her clit again and she took a minute before she climaxed again. This time she didn't restrict me from backing out but I kept on going until she came three more times. Then she wanted to continue our usual sequence but I looked at the clock and realized I barely had time to make lunch and go to work.
So I got dressed and went out to boil hot dogs for lunch. We were still eating when my son arrived home. My daughter had not taken her bath by the time I left for work.
When I got up in the morning my daughter wanted me to walk her to the bus stop. As we walked down she asked me if I was okay since she'd seen my erection when I was eating her but hadn't gotten my rocks off yet. I told her I was fine and I didn't mind giving her the pleasure without taking any for myself. Even before we got to the bus stop she told me to go home and wait for her to come back.
In Iowa the school year is 180 days total. After these two days of multiple orgasms we settled back into the former pattern of one for one, Now my initial reluctance to do these things returned and so I started being out when my daughter returned home. It was not long when avoiding the temptation became a problem because my daughter told my wife. My wife insisted I had no reason not to be home when our daughter got out of school. Little did she know the truth?
So the next day I was home as my wife commanded. My daughter came home, walked in the door, dropped her book bag then took a running jump into an octopus hug. An Octopus hug means to hug you with all your limbs wrapped around the person you are hugging. That puts the hugger’s full weight on the huggee. I'm thankful God gave me a strong frame and core muscles to accept octopus hugs without being injured.
So it's likely that my daughter and I had incestuous relations 175 times during her this school year year. Except for the multiple orgasm days mentioned above most days it started with hugs and kisses and advanced to eating her to an orgasm after which we'd sixty-nine for a while until we'd finish with outercouse until I'd cum.
Chapter five: All Day School
Now she signed up for a full day of school. So now our activities were limited to evenings when my wife took college classes. She was studying now to become a teacher.
My victim has now begun to ask questions. She asked me how babies were made. I explained to her that if I put my penis into her vagina and she was old enough and it was the right time of the month we could make a baby. She asked what time of the month was best for making babies. I explained about what a girl's period was and that a week after it ends seems to be the time of peak fertility for most women. She ask me if her mother and I were planning any more children. I explained that her mother refused to let me put my penis in her vagina so no children were likely. Then she proposed to make a baby with me! I explained that her cleft lip and palate would likely to be duplicated in any child she and I produced together.
She had not yet started having periods yet but at least she would understand what it was and that the bleeding would not be fatal.
On the days my wife had late afternoon classes my son would make my daughter a healthy snack when she got home. Since I had been let go at the community college I was now in retail selling computers. The store was closed weekends and evenings which meant any opportunities for us to continue our incestuous affair were now dependent on my wife being gone in the evenings.
My wife kept trying to complete a college level mathematics course so she could teach middle school math. She took the class three times and failed it all three times. My daughter is now being teased relentenlcy because her cleft lip and palate is causing her nose to be crooked. This name calling caused her to more highly value her father's relationship though they told her in school about good touch bad touch and she told me now that she now understood what I meant when I told her we had a special relationship. We were naked on her parent's bed when she brought it up and I ask her if she wanted to stop. She thought for a moment then said "no."
So when her mother was at the University in the evening we would do what we used to do in the afternoon. She ask me if I wanted to make her feel good and I'd say yes and we'd hug and kiss until she'd French me then we'd feel her nipples until she did it again I'd suck at her nipples on her still undeveloped tits. When she'd pull me up to kiss her and she'd French me again I'd move a hand to her pussy to stimulate her clitoris. At the next entry of her tongue in my mouth I'd move my mouth to her pussy and I'd lick and nibble her to orgasm. Her orgasm were still expressed as shivers starting at her genitals and spreading through her whole body.
We didn't have too many chances to get together which increased risk taking
Chapter Six: Caught
One night my wife complained that she had a head cold. She sniffled and complained all evening so I gave her an antihistamine that generally put me to sleep. She took it and went to bed. I waited a half hour then I went to my daughter's room and woke the child up. She asked me why and I ask her do you want to feel good and she said yes. I carried her out to the living room and finger fucked her to climax then she said I could just rub my cock on her as she was too tired to dry fuck me.
So I was rubbing my cock on her breast bone when my wife came out and ask "What the hell is going on here", I was caught red handed. She said she didn't know what to do. I told her to call 911 because they knew where to route the call. She didn't want to do that. Since she'd quit her job to return to college I was the sole source of income for the family. She knew it would end her gravy train if she called 911.
What she decided to do instead was to be sure to be home when our daughter was home, no more evening classes.
Chapter Seven: Does she want to fuck?
When my daughter was a few years older she ask me if I could make love to her like I would her mother. Then I explained that the first time a girl does accept a man's penis into her vagina there was a membrane of skin that he would have to tear through and that would cause pain the first time she did it. She still wanted to try. So when she'd been dry fucking me for a few minutes I ask her if she wanted it inside her today. When she answered yes I held my organ straight up and my daughter would spread her labia and try to impale herself on my penis. This gave her control of penatration and how much pain she had to take.
Now she had more than six surgeries to correct her cleft lip and palate. The reason she like sex so much was it was a sharp contrast to the pain she suffered in surgery and after each one. Now that intercourse would hurt the first time she did not want to suffer too much pain.
The first time we tried this she was eight. She lowered herself onto my organ until she felt it hit her hymen that put just the head of my penis inside her. At that point she decided to back off and she raised herself off my organ and resumed rubbing her pussy over my penis to help me cum.
We did not try this again for three years.
Om the now rare occasions when my wife would leave me with my daughter, she'd ask me to make her feel good. We would each take our own clothes off, climb up on the bed, hug and kiss like a pair of teeny boppers, when she French Kissed me, I'd rub her nipples which had mow started to haden at my tender touch. When she Frenched me againI'd move my mouth to a nipple and Id suck then, alternating between her still tiny tits. When she French kissed me again I move a hand to her bare pussy and work the slit and her clit gently driving her up the wall. Another tongue kiss would be my signal to eat her which would drive her to orgasm if previous touches had failed to do so.
Then it was my turn as she'd rub my prick, we'd do sixty-nine until we were both hot then she dry fuck me until I'd cum
Chapter Eight: A Change in Behavior
With my wife trying very hard not to leave me and my daughter alone in the house we didn't have many chances to carry out or incestuous relationship. I pretty much knuckled under my wife's plan and just settled into wife enforced celibacy. Then one late September Sunday paper had a Barbie doll from Target for only $3.99. My daughter saw the ad and said she wanted it for a Birthday gift. Now on the day before her birthday I walk out from the back of the mobile home to hear my daughter telling my wife to go get it for her. I smell a hidden motive here.
So I offer to go and get the doll. My daughter immediately objects saying "Daddy doesn't know anything about Barbie; he'll get the wrong one." Then I said, "Then you go with me and make sure I get the right one." Her reply naked no sense at all: "I want to be surprised!" She requested a Barbie doll. We are buying her a Barbie. What surprise is there? I tell them, "Target uses Stock Keening Unit numbers and I'll ask a sales clerk to help me get the right one. Again my daughter demands that my wife go alone to get it. It seems to me this is more about getting my wife out of the house than getting the right doll.
So my wife goes out to the car and even before she gets in my daughter takes me by the hand and takes me to the master bedroom. She immediately starts to take off her clothes. I haven't started to do anything but to stand and watch her. She says, “Come on Dad, You know what we are going to do." So I start to remove my clothing.
It should be noted that up to now that we did our incest acts when my wife was out of the house of her own volition. This time I had stood and listened as my daughter manipulated her out of the house so we could be intimate. I had turned my innocent daughter into a wanton whore!
So here I was in my own bedroom naked lying next to my naked daughter embracing her as my lover. I had already been given the signal to put my hands on her pussy. My other hand is on a nipple that is budding into a breast. She let me suck at her nipple then sent me down to eat her pussy. I ran my tongue up and down her slit until she came. Then we went into sixty-nine until I was hard as granite. When she sat up to dry fuck me I heard my penis using my mouth to say "I want to cum inside you." So my daughter raised herself up and I held my cock straight up as she tried to impale herself on my raging cock. She really tried hard but the pain of pushing on her hymen was too much for her to take.
She thought maybe she had torn it and she ask me to look to see if she should do it again since if it was broken we could fuck without pain. I laid her on her back and opened her outer labia and her inner labia and I opened her vagina and saw an intact hymen, she was still a virgin. So she dry fucked me to my ejaculation and we left the bedroom fully dressed just seconds before my wife came home with the Barbie doll in an opaque bag.
After greeting my wife I returned to the scene of my crime and I prayed to Almighty God to stop my sexual abuse even if he had to take my life. He must have acted because my daughter never again manipulated her mother out of the house nor did she ever express another request to be made to feel good. I thought once again it was over and done with but I wasn't quite done yet.
Chapter Nine: Hiatus and a short failure
For the next eighteen months I lived a normal but celibate lifestyle. My wife was still unpredictably angry and tearing me down with her false accusations of infidelity I had not had sex since September 10, 387 days before and this change from abusing my daughter to celibacy started October 1. In early spring months 18 months later after our daughter had gone to bed my wife and I had a fight where she threatened me with divorce because of my many affairs. Actually the affair narrated in this article was my only true case of infidelity.
My daughter's room was closest to the kitchen where the fight took place. After my wife and I settled down I heard my daughter calling me to go to her room. So I went to her room and entered through the opened door. She asked me if we were getting a divorce, I told her, “I love you and your mother too much to even consider divorce" She thought a minute and said okay. I asked her for a hug and kiss, and she said yes so I bent over her bed and gave her a hug and a kiss. Then she Frenched me. You'll recall that was the signal to move to the next step in our sequence of sexual activity. So I asked her, "Do you want me to feel your breasts?" She nodded her head yes so I reach down and felt her now developed breasts and immediately the Holy Spirit convicted me of my sin and I turned away from her and left the room.
That was the absolutely last time I touched her in anything but a properly fatherly manner.
Now everybody needs human contact. My daughter still craved the touch of her father. She did not want to be sexually abused but she still wanted to touched and truly, purely loved. She found a way to get what she needed by asking me for a back rub. Once I'd start, she'd demand I do it, "Under her shirt". Now she wore nightgown and panties to bed but no bra. So I gave her back rub that went from her shoulders to the small of her back every morning without reaching around to her breasts or down to her still beautifully round but. This may have been inappropriate but it fell short of any reasonable definition of sexual abuse.
Chapter Ten: The plan for a cruise
With my wife's controlling personality she held control of all the family money. She had seized this control by claiming that my handwriting was unreadable. I cooperated by switching to printing in the check register. She then claimed she could not read my printing either. In the six years I spent teaching at the local junior college no student ever claimed that my printing was not clear and legible. All of my blackboard work and over 80% of my overhead projection slides were hand printed by me.
Her control was so complete and her accountability to me was so low that as our daughter turned eleven my wife opened an account in her own name that I did not know about. She was squirreling away money for a cruise vacation. A support group for parents of cleft effected children called "Widesmiles " had organized a three day cruise on Carnival Cruise Lines departing Long Beach, California in early December with stops at Catalina Island;; Ensenada, Baja, Mexico returning to Long Beach.
I had by this time started working for a different computer company that sent me all over the country installing computer networks. On one of these trips the client had put me in a hotel across the street from Disneyland in Anaheim, California. I did not take the opportunity to go to the happiest place on Earth because it would have provided my wife one more reason to yell at me. But I did spot a budget price hotel in the neighborhood and thought of it when my wife told me about her secret account to pay for the cruise.
She wanted just us two to go on the cruise. That made no sense to me. If the cruise was about supporting parents of cleft effected children didn't it make sense to bring along the cleft effected child? So she needed to save more money for our daughter's cruise fare.
She also wanted to drive from our home in Eastern Iowa to the departure port of Long Beach. Having flown over the Rockies in the computer network installation I didn't want to drive our twenty year old 1976 Plymouth Volare over that two thousand mile trek. I said if we were going to go we would get out to California and back by air. I had a friend at church who ran a travel agency and he set a good price for the flight and my wife saved a bit more to cover that too.
The ship held a formal dinner each evening. I had suits for my work. My wife had outgrown the girth of all her previous gowns and our daughter had never needed formal wear. So both of the ladies in my life needed evening wear for the cruise. Our town had a very limited selection. So we made a trip to the capital city to get both my girls formal wear. My wife found a gown at a plus size store and then ask them if they had anything for our young lady.
She tried on a gown that covered her from her chin to her feet but didn't like the way it looked. I liked it because I didn't need her showing things to remind me of what had gone on before. She tried on another gown that covered her from the base of her neck to the floor. She thought it was okay but wanted to model one more for her mom and me.
This gown was completely inappropriate for an eleven year old child. It had sheer silk from her neck to just above her breasts and the back was sheer all the way to her waist. It could not have been sexier. The front showed cleavage! Cleavage on an eleven year young child is not appropriate. I did not want her in this gown. But there were three people involved in this decision and I was outvoted. So she got the sexy gown. Both of them denied that it showed cleavage.
When we returned home my daughter put on the gown to show her brother. While she was changing in her room I told him I wanted his opinion on whether the gown showed cleavage. My son told me his sister didn't have any cleavage. As soon as she came into the room he exclaimed "S-----a, you have cleavage!" So it wasn't my imagination.
Chapter eleven: The cruise itself
So we flew from our town to Minneapolis, Minnesota by Northwest Airlines Turbo Prop and caught a connecting flight in a Jumbo jet to Los Angelas. We spent the night in the PennySaver hotel which is across the street from Disneyland.
The following day we received a phone call from a Canadian family who was also going on the Widesmiles Cruise. We met then in Disneyland and went on rides, saw shows and watched parades.
The next day we took a taxi to Long Beach to catch our cruise. My daughter had bought a brand new one piece swim suite once she found out cruise ships have swimming pools. I had gone with her to order it and was pleased she had selected it instead of a bikini.
Still she found a way to get under my skin even with a one piece suit.
It was our second day out and we all went up to the pool deck. My daughter decided to go swimming. She’d never had swimming lessons so I decided if she was going to swim I would also be ready to help her if she would get in trouble, The ship did not station a lifeguard.
So my daughter and I retired to our cabin to change, she went to change in the bathroom while I quickly changed in the main cabin. I had my trunks on when she came out of the bathroom with the bathing suit pulled over her hips but without pulling the top up and pulling the straps on her arms to cover her now developing tits. They did look inviting but once again God gave me strength to say, “Pull up the straps and cover your breasts” She pulled the straps over her arms and covered herself. Crisis averted.
Chapter twelve: What Now?
My wife had a severe fear of the thunderstorms which are common in the Midwest where we were living. My daughter caught this same fear. Since my wife had been so negative and ego destroying I did not feel like helping her so my attention went once again to my former lover, my daughter. She'd ask to sit on my lap so I could hold her close. She sat very still but would shove a breast into my chest so occasionally she'd still feel my erection growing. These were allowed to fade after we returned from the storm shelter.
About three years after our last abortive abuse episode we sold our mobile home and moved to Des Moines, the Capital city of Iowa. We bought a 2 bedroom home on the North end and my wife was now teaching and I worked at various jobs mostly with computers. My daughter was in advanced placement classes in school.
She'd often lie on her stomach in front of the television in the living room doing her homework. Her hair was still the wavy long light brown hair hanging down her back. She complained that her back was itching. She asked me to scratch her back. I started to do it outside her shirt. She turned her head back and said, "Under my shirt, Dad." so I put my hands under her shirt, as I scratched my fingers eventually touched the bra strap that ran her back. When that happened she'd take off her bra and pull it out her sleeve. Now here was an opportunity to cop a feel of her young firm breasts. But this was not something I wanted to do because I suspected she was testing my resolve.
(I take no credit for my repentance. The Bible teaches that the power to resist temptation comes from God. Give him the credit.)
Now a 2002 Men's Fitness Magazine tells us that if a woman removes any article of clothing, other than a coat, it is because she wants you. Maybe true but that didn't mean I had to cooperate in anything my daughter wanted to do that would bring further damage to her. We still lived in an area prone to severe thunderstorms and she still sat on my lap to be held and shoved that breast into my chest but I would not allow myself to drift back into that improper relationship.
Even more troubling than holding her in thunderstorms or the back scratching routine were the two times she came out of her bedroom, embraced her father in a tight hug and made out with me while pushing her abdomen into my mine, These two events created raging hard-on that she could feel while holding me so close. Not sure what her intent was since both events were closely witnessed by her mother and my wife, who were one and the same person.
Women reading this should realize men do not have conscious control their own erections. They are an involuntary response to stimuli. Just because he gets hard does not mean he has to have you.
To those who think you can have an incestuous relationship with a daughter and as long as you are gentle and have their consent no harm will come to her, here is a news flash: Don't bet your daughter's mental health on it! The incidents when my daughter came to me and made out with me creating an erection on me were not my daughter's idea but rather the work of one of her alters. She has been diagnosed as having Dissociative Personality Disorder. This is commonly called Multiple Personality Disorder. The one who made out with me was the personality that enjoyed the incest. There is another personality who is mad as hell about the incest and there is the primary personality that doesn't think the incest made any difference to her.
According to most incest authorities incest runs through multiple generations of a family. I firmly believe my wife was sexually abused by her father with oral sex which later advanced to intercourse. She claimed to be a virgin but had no hymen when we consummated our marriage. According to Jan Frank M. S. author of A Door of Hope a woman with more than four of the fifteen symptoms she listed in that volume is an adult survivor of childhood sexual ad use. From her list my wife displayed no less than eight.
a controlling personality
anger without reason
sexually cutting off a spouse without telling them
expecting perfection in the spouse
extremely negative response to certain scents
This points to her being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and the final circumstantial evidence was given to me by my mother-in-law who told me my wife had come back from her last visit to her father in tears and begging never to be sent back. She was only eight when he raped her causing the pain which brought the tears. I stayed in the marriage long after realizing my wife had lied to me about who she was and what she had done. In fact I have reason to believe she lied about everything she told me.
In prison I studied two things, abnormal psychology and what we Christians call the Holy Scriptures. The only unforgivable sin is blasphemy against the Holy Spirit, not rape, incest or even murder. We must face the fact that sexual abuse of children is harmful. Susan Smith, who murdered her children by strapping them into theior child safety seats then driving their car into a lake, had consensual sex with her father that morning, something she had done since childhood. Just because they consent or even ask for it doesn't mean it won't hurt them.
Now, if she was still acting provokative, why did her Dad finally have to pay for his crime by serving nine years and three months in prison? When she went to High School she made new friends and when she was sixteen one of my daughter's friends was pregnant. The father of the teenager's baby was her own step father! After her own experience with me, my daughter wanted the abuse of her friend to stop. So she strongly suggested this friend report her situation to her school counseler. The girl refused. So my daughter goes to the school counselor and reports her friend is pregnant by her stepfather. The couselor calls in the pregant young woman and asks her about her pregnancy. The girl denies even being pregnant! Then she gives my daughter the cold shoulder.
My daughter is not experienced in rejectiom, Her father has been practicing his unconditional love for her four solid years. So she goes to the couselor to ask how to deal with this unearned rejection and while talking she's mutilating her arms by digging into them with her nails which causes the counselor to ask my daughter what is bugging her. Then my daughter told the counselor that her father had sexually abused her from age five through age twelve. All teachers in Iowa's schools are mandatory reporters. That makes the passing on of any abuse report mandatory under penalty of law.
So Ms. Lyon does what the law requires and calls the Iowa Department of Human Services. IDHS calls the Des Moines Police Department.. They investigate and call the report unfounded because there was no evidence that any abuse occurred in that jurisdiction. But they sent my wife's report of catching us as I reported in Chater 6: Caught, and my daughter's statements to the IDHS and Des Moines police and send it back to the county where the abuse occured. My daughter was put in foster care until I moved out of the house, which I did a week later.
She felt guilty over breaking up her parent's marriage. She's not guilty of that. Her mother destroyed the marriage by refusing to be a wife to me in the bedroom. My contribution was not being sufficiently assertive in demanding what a husband should have from his wife. While the Bible does say the man is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, this does not give him the unlimited right to lord it over her. Christ gave his life for his church. So a husband is called into a self-sacrificing love. I gave too much.
As a result of my crime I've lost contact with all the people I ever loved. My son neither wrote me in prison nor called since I've been out. My wife became my ex-wife three years after I went to prison, Without my income she lost her new car, her house, and I don't know what else. So was it worth all this to have a few years of gratification?
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