Gender: Male Age: Secret Location: N/A
|Introduction: This was meant to be the original name, but I made a mistake and it took a month for XNXX to respond to my email.|
This is the original and the sequel in the Body Of A Man, Mind Of A Machine series. This series focuses more on psychology and human interaction than kinky sex. If you are looking for a hardcore porno screenplay, this isn't it. But if you just want a good deep short story, I hope you enjoy. Part 3 will be out soon.
My name is Adrian, and I have always been different from other people. I’m sixteen, but other than my physical appearance (I’m 5’10, have brown hair, turquoise eyes, and a lean frame), I can’t be compared to other guys my age. I’ve always focused on logic and reason over emotion and social dynamics. If it weren’t for the fact that I was basically devoid of all humanity and emotions, I would be the Jesus of emos. Most people at school can’t stand being around me, because my logic and focus on reality basically crushes all of their dreams and beliefs. I can scientifically explain why their religion is false, why the habits that they think help them actually serve no purpose, why their views go against logic and reason, and I can list all of the flaws in their arguments.
This tendency to crush their human traits has earned me the nickname ‘Adroid’, since I’m basically the closest thing they’ve ever come to meeting a robot. I was probably the greatest cause of the creation of the nickname. When someone asked me how I could possibly develop the views I have, I replied by saying that I simply came to conclusions by looking at problems the way a machine would.
Some people find this trait of mine to be rather fascinating, but only a few. Guys who just need someone to follow basically carve what I say into stone, while the others consider me a buzz-kill. Girls who want someone that they can use as a comparison for when they try to change their boyfriends will often ask me random questions about my views, in an attempt to get inside my head. The rest hate me because I crush their childish fairy tale hopes and dreams.
There was one girl that seemed to be the most curious about what I had to say. Her name was Jenny, and she had long brownish-blonde hair, blue eyes, and a well-tanned complexion. She was exceptionally beautiful, with a very womanly figure. However, she did not affect my sexual drive, due to my logical mind and lack of emotions.
She asked me questions as if I was an all-knowing magic 8-ball. But she always picked her questions carefully, because my harsh logic was like fire; it’s comforting if you keep a safe distance, but you’ll get burned if you come too close. She sought me out for guidance and wisdom, using my inhuman logic in a human world. She was probably the closest thing I had to a friend.
It was lunch, and I was sitting at a large round table in the middle of the school cafeteria. Jenny had asked me to have lunch with her and her friends, instead of sitting by myself on the bleachers. She knew that I would have preferred to be alone, so she said I could just sit back and not talk to anyone if I didn't want to. Jenny's friends paid no attention to me, and I just sat back and ate my lunch. The large group of girls was gossiping about the boys they were dating. As I listened to them, a question began to form in my mind, one that I couldn't help but ask, due to the situation.
"Can I ask you all a question? I'm hoping that you can give me the answer that I can't find on my own." I asked. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds.
"Sure, what is it?" One of Jenny's friends asked.
"What is the purpose of your relationships?" I inquired. There was another awkward silence as everyone tried to figure out the meaning of the question.
"What do you mean?" Jenny asked.
"What is the purpose of the relationships you have through dating? I don't understand why you bother." I explained.
"We do it... to find someone to love." One of Jenny's friends said, trying to pick her words carefully.
"But what comes out of it? Say you find someone that you actually do love; do you have any idea how high the chances are that you will break up? It's practically inevitable." I asked.
"No it's not." Another girl piped up.
"Yes it is. Statistically speaking, between eighty and ninety percent of all divorces are because the man and woman had been dating since high school or college. Being in your twenties is a death sentence to any relationship, and marriage isn’t the long shot, life is. Do you really think your relationship can last throughout the rest of high school, your college years, and your twenties? Basically, if you've lasted until college, unless you both go to the same universities, that relationship is more doomed than it already is. Even if you say to yourself that your relationship is "special", and you and your partner will maintain your romantic bond for the rest of your lives, you have to realize that every single couple that failed thought the same thing. What makes you think that your relationships are any different than all of the others? Why do you enter relationships when failure is practically unavoidable?" I asked. There was yet another awkward silence.
"We do it... for the memories? For the enjoyment? For practice?" One girl said, asking herself more than she was asking me. All around the table, all of the girls were being affected by my words, and were beginning to contemplate the value and point of being in a relationship.
"What kind of answer is practice? How would you like it if you were dating someone and they just said that you were practice to them? How would you like it if we were dating and I told you that I’m just using you as practice for when someone better than you comes along? But if everyone considers their teenage relationships to be practice, then that must mean that all teenagers know that they are nothing but practice, and are in denial. If you weren’t in denial, then why would you put any emotional effort into a relationship if you know that you both consider the other one to be practice for a more meaningful relationship later, and it will inevitably fail?
And what memories? What enjoyment? Relationships in this part of your lives are nothing but emotionally-strenuous bonds with the illusion of something new and exciting. Your minds aren't fully developed and stabilized, making it so that hormones and the fear of being alone cause your feelings towards the other person. The whole time you're with them, your instincts and hormones are making you look at other people the way you originally looked at your partner. This wandering gaze causes you to devalue your relationship, because you convince yourselves that your heart is telling you that you aren't where you are meant to be, when really, its because your hormones are telling you to be with other people.
Eventually, your relationship, which had briefly burned with such passion, will be nothing but ash, as you both try to hide your contempt for each other out of the fear of being alone. Soon, your doomed relationship shatters, and you are left emotionally barren and exhausted. And during the time it takes to recuperate from the emotional strain, you look back at that relationship and curse yourself for wasting all of that effort on something so insipid as a high school romance. The trial leaves you with more emotional strain than happy memories, and your youth is wasted while your heart and mind heal, only for you to repeat the process with someone else. Even without knowing the statistics, you must surely know what I am talking about, and have experienced it first hand." I said.
All around the table, the girls' eyes gained a sad grayish hue and their complexions became pale as sorrow lined their faces. The impact of my words had broken their illusion of reality.
"But what about you? What would you seek in a relationship?" A girl asked.
"I do not want to be in a relationship." I said. Just before she could ask, I answered her.
"You assume that like all other teenage boys, I only desire sex, which is the largest reason why males enter relationships. Even after all I have said, your experience with boys tells you that I am just a horny fool looking for someone to screw. At sixteen years of age, when my anatomy is supposed to be saturated with hormones, I have learned ultimate self-control. I have severed logical thought from sexual desire, as sexual desire serves no beneficial purpose outside of reproduction, which has no place at this stage in my life. It is illogical.
Basically, I do not want to have sex." I said. My words shook all of the girls from their dread-dazes, and they stared at me with disbelief.
"You... don't?" One girl asked, trying to find some common link between me and every other boy that she had dated and socialized with.
"No, my heart seeks purity, and a love that is devoid desire-based contamination. Since basically all relationships in your teens and twenties are pointless, sex would be nothing but a hollow act of perversion, compromising the purity of your identity and leaving you to walk through this world, knowing that you have just given away a piece of your soul in the form of a doomed romance.
When I say that my heart seeks purity, I mean that my heart will not allow me to be with anyone that has been with someone else. If a girl so much as kisses someone, then I see her become contaminated by the emotional scent of the person they were with. Our species is so desperate for love at such young ages, that we compromise our identities without any consideration of the future. For me, love is impossible, as all girls will have been marked by countless others by the time we would be old enough to have a potential life-long relationship.
By accepting my limitations and embracing my desire to be alone, I have achieved a forlorn enlightenment. I have learned to completely separate sexual desire from my rational mind, and with that purification, I have come to accept and embrace the fact that I am going to die alone.
So I ask again: After everything I have just told you, what purpose do you find in relationships?" I asked. No reply came, everyone had the same look of sorrow as before. I gave low sigh and stood up with my back to them.
“What I just showed you are my last few strands of humanity. I can only hope that they will disappear soon, as they serve no purpose in a rational mind.” I said before walking away. After taking only a few steps, I stopped as I heard one of the girls jump to her feet.
“What the hell is wrong with you?! Just because something doesn’t help you in the long run doesn’t make it pointless. Some of the smallest things make people the happiest.” She said desperately, trying to understand how I could be so cold. I turned to her and gave a small quick sigh, almost like a chuckle.
“Tch, how illogical.” I said before walking away.
It was Friday, and I was getting my textbook for the last class. I closed my locker door and turned around, standing face to face with Jenny. She was wearing a black miniskirt that wrapped tightly around her tan thighs, a white tank top that exposed her cleavage, high-healed boots, and a large belt that went around her stomach instead of her waist. She had her hands behind her back, and was constantly shifting her weight and biting her lip.
“Adrian, I know that this isn’t really your thing… but you know that the Junior Prom is this weekend, right?” She asked.
“Yes.” I said, like the beat of a drum.
“Well I would really like to go, but I have no one to go with. Would you like to go with me, as friends?” She asked nervously.
“I would prefer not to.” I said dryly.
“Please? I really don’t want to go with just my girlfriends.” She said, giving me the Bambi eyes. I sighed.
I was standing in my bedroom, looking at myself in a mirror. I was wearing a tuxedo, with a rose in the breast pocket of the jacket. The lights of the room were off, with the only illumination coming from my laptop. The light radiating from the screen was blue, for it was open to the stories section of XNXX.com. I was a frequent writer of the site, and often checked to see if my stories had gotten any new comments.
While I prided myself on logic and reason, the balance was not perfect, due to my age. I could separate my sexual drive from my logical mind, but I could not completely remove it. The only way I could maintain this separation was by turning different parts of my mind into alter egos, and choose when I would let them out.
My perverted side was basically like a dog; as long as I let it get its daily exercise, it would sleep the rest of the time and not claw at the door. Writing sex stories gave my hormonal side his indulgences, and allowed me to remain logical during the day.
As I closed my laptop, my last traces of physical desire were sealed away, along with the blue light. I looked in the mirror one last time and sighed.
The Junior Prom was just as I expected it to be. The gymnasium was dark, the music was trashy, and the people were degenerates. There were no chaperones, so as long as the room was dark, people could basically do whatever they wanted.
On the gym floor, people were grinding against each other as if they were in the first stages of an orgy. Along the walls, guys were drinking from a whiskey bottle, hidden in one of the flower bouquets being sold outside. In one of the corners, a couple were making out. The girl pulled down the straps of her dress, revealing her tits, which were round and full for her age. She gave a silent moan as he started sucking her on her nipples.
“Perverted fools.” I muttered.
I was sitting at a table in the corner, trying to keep my temper in check as watched the endless parade of degeneration. Jenny was with a group of her friends, who were constantly looking at me in disbelief. I had to admit, Jenny had never looked more beautiful. She was wearing a red sequin dress with a slit that went up her leg and stopped halfway up her thigh. She was wearing black high-heeled shoes, hairclips, diamond earrings, and the perfect amount of makeup.
She walked over to me and sat down on the other side of the table.
“Why don’t you go dance?” She asked with a smile.
“I don’t dance.” I said simply.
Several moments passed by, with the only sound being Jenny drumming her fingers on the table.
“Adrian, there is something that you said earlier that I didn’t quite understand. It was when you said that your mind wouldn’t let you be with someone if they had been with someone else. I’ve never heard anyone say something like that.”
“What I told you was one of the last few shreds of my humanity. A while back, I was obsessed with finding my soul mate. I was consumed by loneliness and depression, and believed that love was the only thing that could save me. However, my heart sought purity above mere companionship. When two people interact romantically and/or sexually, they trade parts of their identity. It’s like that health class saying,
“When you have sex with someone, you’re having sex with everyone they’ve had sex with.” Though it also works at the emotional level.
When two people kiss or have sex, they forever carry a part of each other. My mind would not let me be with a girl unless her identity was pure. However, that wasn’t the only purity I desired. Ethical sexuality was also required. Those with impure identities don’t realize how important their identities are, and they give their bodies without hesitation. All the guys my age hate their virginity, but I cherish it, because it symbolizes my intact identity and my morality.”
“So it’s sort of like celibacy to a priest.”
“Not exactly. They are abstinent for God; I am abstinent for myself and for the preservation of my morals and identity.
Even after you lose your virginity, your identity can be further corrupted through romantic contact with other people.” I said.
I looked around for several seconds and pointed to the couple standing in the dark corner. The girl had her knee lifted, letting her boyfriend finger-bang her. The dim lighting of the dark gymnasium just barely reflected off the pussy juice that coated his fingers.
“See that couple right there? Neither of them has any sexual ethics left, because they’ve both had countless sexual and romantic partners. They each give each other their physical forms without hesitation, and for the wrong reasons.
As I grew older, I became more logical and noticed the inevitable failure of high school relationships. I looked up relationship statistics and found that basically any marriage that starts before you’re both in your thirties is doomed to fail.
I realized that even if I could find a girl who fit the requirements that my mind set (requirements that I could not change if I wanted to), my relationship with her would inevitably fail. And if I waited until I was old enough to have a chance at a lifetime relationship with someone, they would have already compromised their identities.
No matter what I do, I will die alone, so there is no point in thinking about romance. Those realizations made me the man I am today.” I said. Jenny just stared at me for several seconds. A slow song suddenly started to play, and Jenny perked up as if she was a cat spotting a moth.
“I know you said that you don’t dance, but do you think that…” She trailed off. I was silent for a few moments.
“As you wish.” I finally said as she and I stood up.
We walked out onto the dance floor, where all of the couples were slow dancing. With Jenny’s hands on my shoulders and my hands on her hips, we began to dance. Jenny had a warm smile as the song progressed.
“What are you Adrian?” She finally asked.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“You are far too logical to be human, but you have too much heart to be a machine. Ever since I met you, I’ve tried to figure out just what you are, but every time you speak, I’m more confused than ever.” She said curiously.
“I am just a man who is wiser than most others, even those that are older than himself. I am merely what others should be.” I said. Jenny chuckled.
“It is people like you who have the power to change the world. People like Jesus and Gandhi always start out this way.” She said with a smile. I was silent.
“You look beautiful tonight.” I finally said. She gave a soft laugh.
“That is probably the nicest thing you’ve ever said. You know, to be honest, I wouldn’t have dressed up this much if I went with anyone but you.” She said. I was silent as she slowly placed her hand on my cheek.
“I think… I’m ready to go home.” She said softly.
The car came to a halt in front of Jenny’s house. There weren’t any lights on, for her parents were out of town. We stepped outside and I walked her to the door.
“I hope you had a nice time.” I said without emotion.
“Adrian, there is something I really need to talk to you about. Can we please talk inside?” She asked nervously. I was silent for a moment.
“Very well.” I said, prompting her to unlock the door. We stepped into the dark house and she grasped my hand.
“Come with me.” She said softly in the darkness.
She led me upstairs and the only sounds were our footsteps and the gentle swaying of Jenny’s dress. We reached the second story and neither of spoke as I followed her to her bedroom. Jenny closed the door and then walked to the other end of the room. The room was dark, with the only illumination coming from the streetlamp outside.
“What did you want to talk about?” I asked.
Jenny turned to me and her eyes seemed to glow in the faint darkness. She slowly reached up and pulled the straps of her dress off her shoulders. She pulled it all the way off, showing that she was wearing nothing underneath. With Jenny standing naked before me, my hormonal side clawed at the inside of my mind in desperation, but I easily suppressed it. Even without my hormonal side, I would be lying if I said that she didn’t have a beautiful body.
“I decided that I want to lose my virginity, and you are the one I want to give it to you.” She said with her voice full of emotion.
Without saying a word, I turned around and grasped the door handle. Jenny rushed over and put her hands on my shoulders.
“Adrian, please wait.” She said desperately.
“Why? You can only offer physical gratification, something that I have no need for. I have no reason to be here.” I said with as much emotion as a computer.
“Please, don’t stay here for yourself, do it for me. I want to give myself to you.” She said. I turned to her.
“Why in the world would you want that? Have you listened to nothing I have said?” I asked. She stepped back and I took my hand off of the doorknob.
“Let me tell you what would happen if we were to be intimate: It would be a mediocre experience compared to what you expect it to be and we would both contaminate our identities. We have no chance of forming or even sustaining a relationship, and even if we did form one, it would inevitably fail. Once that happens, any positive feelings we have for each other are reduced to loathing of each other and ourselves, and all memories bring nothing but pain.
I would loath myself because I would have doomed my path to transcending the human mind by compromising my ideals and morals. You would loath yourself, because you would realize that you would have given your most important aspect to someone that didn’t deserve it, and you would have nothing to give if you met someone else. You would be reduced to nothing more than a used condom with a brain, and I would be a hollow shell, unable to find joy in this human world but unable to break free of it. We would both walk through this world as impure beings, forever regretting the mistake we made and hating the curse of youth.
If we were to be intimate, there would be no love and happiness afterwards, just pain and loathing. That is the curse of the human race, and I have worked hard to make sure that I don’t endure that same empty fate. And if you have any respect for yourself, you will get some self control and wait for someone who is actually capable of sharing your feelings.” I said coldly.
Jenny’s eyes darkened, and she clutched herself as if my words had struck her naked form like a frigid breeze.
“I don’t care about that, I don’t care what happens afterwards. Adrian, when we were dancing and I told you that you had the power to change the world, I meant that you had changed mine. You may not feel the same way about me, but I love you and I just want to be with you in any way that I can.” She said as a tear rolled down her cheek.
“Tch, how illogical.” I scoffed. Jenny walked over and placed her hand on my cheek.
“Please, if you care about me at all, you’ll stay. As much as you try to run from it, you are human. I’m not telling you to be like everyone else, no; your uniqueness is what I love most about you. I just asking you to open your heart and accept me. I don’t care if you don’t love me, just please let me show you how much I love you. You don’t have to give me anything, just let me give myself to you.” She said desperately.
Time seemed to stand still as we both looked into each other’s eyes. As the seconds passed by, my logical side relinquished some control of my mind, and my emotional and hormonal side slowly began to reveal themselves.
“As you wish.” I finally said. Jenny smiled and walked towards the bed. As she lay down, I undressed and walked over to her.
I climbed into the bed and suspended myself over her. I paused, then slowly leaned down and kissed her. Our lips joined and separated over and over again, and I had to admit that it felt better then I thought it would. Not only was the physical enjoyment far beyond what I thought it would be like, but there was another form of pleasure that I was experiencing, one that wasn’t coming from any nerve endings. I mentally searched my body, trying to find where the feeling was coming from, but I couldn’t identify the source.
As we kissed, my logical side fully gave up and my emotional and hormonal sides took full control. I was becoming more involved and enjoying it more than I thought I would. I already had an erection that was as hard as a rock and seven inches long, and I was exploring her body with my right hand, while using my left arm to stay suspended.
Her breasts were round and soft, but had the perfect amount of firmness. Her areolas were the size of quarters, with nipples like pencil erasers. She moaned and hummed with each squeeze as I massaged every inch, using every muscle in my hand as if I were controlling the strings of a puppet.
I moved my hand down, with my fingertips brushing against her slim belly. I could feel my heart-rate skyrocket as I reached her pubes, which had obviously been trimmed. I placed my index and middle finger on the two lips of her pussy and gently rubbed them, causing Jenny to tremble and hum loudly. With each stroke, the lips would become wetter and wetter as she became more aroused.
I slowly inserted my middle finger and her thighs clamped around my hand like a vice-grip, but the soft wet insides of her pussy seemed to be inviting me further. I pushed my whole finger in, and Jenny’s moans became louder as I worked it in and out, loosening her virgin pussy.
She put her hand on mine and pushed down on it, encouraging me to go even further. I early obliged and pushed in my index and ring finger, then began pulling them out and pushing them back in. Her insides were incredibly tight, but she quickly loosened up as I worked my fingers harder and faster. With each dive, I could almost feel the interior walls of her pussy opening up, almost like pulling an orange in half. I could just barely feel her hymen with my middle finger.
Jenny suddenly pulled her lips from mine and whispered in my ear,
“Adrian, I’m ready.”
“Alright.” I replied softly.
Jenny spread her legs as I grasped my manhood and pressed the head against the soft lips of her pussy. I drop of pre-cum oozed from the tip as my self-control became more erratic. I slowly pushed my manhood into her pussy, and we both shivered from the physical ecstasy. Jenny dug her fingernails into my back and her humming turned more into a moan with every inch I delved.
The head of my cock was pressed against her hymen, and I had another inch before I would be all the way in. I gave one large thrust, rupturing Jenny’s hymen and deflowering her. She gave a shrill moan and dug her nails into my back so tightly that I winced in pain.
I pulled my dick out six inches and then forced it back in, causing Jenny to give another deeper moan. We began to move back and forth in rhythm, and with every thrust I gave, Jenny would moan. She wrapped her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist, holding onto me for dear life.
With my face buried in her pillow and the sweet smell of her hair filling my senses, I realized that this was nothing like what I thought it would be. I always figured that since I was so different from everyone else, sex would give me only a hollow feeling, but this… this was the opposite. I could feel physical and emotional bliss saturating every fiber of my being. It was a form of enjoyment that I had never thought possible.
Jenny’s pussy felt like a mix of the interior of a grapefruit and soft bubblegum. True, that is a horrible and inaccurate horrible comparison, but I couldn’t think of anything else. Jenny’s hot wet insides hugged by manhood tightly, soaking it as I explored every corner of her pussy.
I wrapped my arms around Jenny and then rolled onto my back, swinging her up. She leaned back and moaned as she rode my cock. She moved back and forth and up and down, trying to find some area of her pussy that my manhood had not yet probed. She had a thin film of sweat, which caught the light of the street lamp outside and almost made her glow.
I ran my hand up and down her chest, relishing the feel of her body. In my mind, my hormonal side was howling like a wolf, happy that it was now being fully released. Jenny leaned forward and gripped the headboard for support, and I reached up and began kissing her breasts, sucking on her nipples in pure joy.
As she bounced up and down on my cock, Jenny’s body began to tremble and her moans became more and more shrill. She gripped my shoulders and gave a mix of a scream and moan as she had a gushing orgasm. I came moments after, sending thick streams of semen up inside her.
Jenny collapsed beside me, and for ten minutes, we just stared at the ceiling as we tried to catch her breath. Once my body had calmed itself, I sat up.
“I should head home, my parents will be worried if it gets too late.” I said before standing up. As I dressed, Jenny sat up and looked at me.
“Adrian, did you enjoy that? I seemed like it was good for you, but you are always so hard to read.” She said with neither a look of happiness nor sadness.
I finished buttoning my shirt and slowly turned to her. For the first time in a long time, I had a smile on my face. It was not a wide ear-to-ear smile, but it was a warm one. I was in a state of awareness that I had not felt before. I was neither logical, nor emotional, nor hormonal. I was in a combination of the three and neither of them.
“Would you maybe like to go out to dinner with me tomorrow night?” I asked warmly. Jenny gained the same warm smile and gave a small sigh of relief.
“That would be a dream come true.” She said softly. As I opened the door, Jenny then spoke up.
“I love you Adrian.” She said. I then turned to her.
“Tch, how illogical.” I said without losing my smile.
I then walked out of her bedroom and left her house. Halfway from the door to my car, I looked up at Jenny’s bedroom window. She was standing at the window with a blanket wrapped around her. She blew me a kiss and winked at her in reply.
I climbed back into my car and drove away, happy for the first time in my life.
Confusing, that is the word I would use to describe my relationship with Jenny. It had been a month since we were first intimate, and ever since, my mind had struggled to regain its mental bearings. My hormonal and emotional side had fused together and were fighting against my cold logical side. My machine-like logical side was what made me unique to everyone else, it was like a soul made of gears and circuits. I did not want to lose it, because it meant giving up my identity. But the other half of my mind was arguing that I could not be a cold machine and be with her, I could be alone and focused or be a human with Jenny.
Ever since Jenny and I had been intimate, I had struggled to find a name to give the resulting combination of my emotions and hormonal desires. The most fitting title could find was to call it my heart, pardon the corny cliché. Having a heart was a very peculiar experience, one that I had never felt. Before, the heart was merely an organ with the purpose of pumping blood, with the poetic meaning as little more than a human construct, an illusion to justify an empty existence. Now I could actually feel the purpose of that poetic definition, though I understood it as much as I did the wonders of the universe.
The reason my heart was fighting my logical side with such passion was because of Jenny. I had spent my life studying humans, but she was different. She was always trying to get me to open up and be more social, but always gently. She wouldn't drag me out of my seat to talk to other people, but instead ask me what I would say to them and how I would interact. It was almost a form of social simulation. She knew and admired that I was an antisocial person, so she would only take me to my limits of tolerance and then never take me farther. It was as if she knew there was a line I would not cross in terms of socializing, and she just wanted me to be as close to that line as possible while still being happy. She wasn't trying to change me, she just wanted me to go as far as I could.
She had a form of patience that I had never seen before, a way of understanding that I didn't think others had. What would have normally driven a girl away seemed to draw her like moths to a porch light. I had not told her that I loved her, mostly because I wasn't sure what my feelings were for her. I definitely cared about her, but I could not figure out what actually constituted love. This did not detour her from every day saying that she loved me, and the fact that I had not returned the statement did not drain her patience, it increased it. She understood me in ways that I didn't think were possible and could read me like a book. Everything I did seemed to make her love me more, from my tendency to rarely smile to my quiet statue-like presence in social situations. She was my link to the human world, and it was as if she was studying me as much as I was studying her.
We were intimate a few times every week, but I could not decide whether it was sex or making love. It was both and neither of them, and every second, my mind would be filled with bliss and confusion. I enjoyed being intimate with her, both for the strange physical and emotional feelings that it created. I saw every session as an opportunity to study these feelings like specimens in a lab, and she saw it as an opportunity to bond herself with something that was more than human.
I was in my parent's garage, using the power tools to work on one of my projects. My father made a lot of money, so he had bought me several power tools when I discovered my talent for wood and metal work. I was working on the handle of a steel spike, which could be used as both a shiv and a dart. I often made weapons such as these, merely out of hobby and fascination. Most of my projects focused around an icicle-shaped steel spike instead of a blade, because I thought that the unconventional weapon fit my personality best.
“I knew I would find you here.” I heard a voice call.
I looked out the garage door and saw Jenny walking up the driveway. My parents were out running errands, so the driveway was empty. Jenny looked absolutely radiant in the sunlight as she brushed back a lock of her long blond hair.
“Hey.” I said calmly as I used a power grinder to form handle grooves on the dart, being held in place by a table vice. The spike was about eight inches long and slightly thicker than a pencil. From back to tip, the slope did not bend or change angle. It maintained it's shape like a miniature pool cue.
She walked into the garage, kissed me on the cheek, and then sat up on the table. She was wearing a pair of tiny skimpy shorts, a plain white tank top, and a red lace bra that could just barely be seen through the thin fabric. Her outfit was causing my reawakened hormonal side to start clawing at the inside of my mind.
“So what are you making this time?” She asked sweetly.
“Just another dart.” I said before finishing.
With the the tip s sharp as a needle, I threw it at a dartboard on the wall. Several similar steel spikes were imbedded in the colored foam, and the newest spike was imbedded in the center. My aim with them was almost perfect.
“You know, many people would be concerned with the idea of someone like you making these weapons.” Jenny said innocently.
“I have no reason to use these on other people. The action would serve no purpose and only cause meaningless pain and cause negative consequences. I create these to act as merely hand-made trophies and concealed self-defense tools. The spike form represents their difference to traditional bladed weapons, much like my difference to other people. The only ones who have anything to fear from these weapons are those who mean me harm. Plus, it's not like I'm going to bring them to school with me.” I said as I retrieved the spikes, glad that their points had not been dulled. They were far harder to sharpen than blades.
“Why is it that you spend so much time in here? I know that you enjoy working with your hands, but is there another reason?” She asked. I was silent as I looked around.
“I like this place because I am surrounded by machines. They all serve their purpose without question, only refusing when they are broken. By creating these objects, I am given a purpose and can fulfill it like the machines around me. I become another part of the assembly line.” I said softly.
Jenny got off the table and wrapped her arms around my neck. She gently kissed me, pressing her lips against mine for several seconds.
“But unlike these machines, our relationship will never break down.” She hummed. I gave a small smile, but it quickly disappeared.
“But how can you be sure when everything in youth is only temporary?” I asked with a hint of sadness. She did not seem phased in the least by the question. It seemed to only confirm her belief.
“Because I choose to love you and we can all choose our fate.” She said sweetly.
“Again, that is incorrect. Our actions don't direct our fates, fate controls our actions. We only do what time says we-” I was cut off as Jenny grabbed my collar with one hand and the garage door remote with the other.
“Shut up and make love to me.” She said passionately.
I gave a sad smile as I tried to make the transition between my logical side and my heart. As the garage door closed, Jenny sat back up on the table and pulled me over to her. We began kissing passionately (technically she kissing me passionately and I was trying to mirror her movements). I could practically smell her hormones in her breath as her level of arousal skyrocketed with each passing moment.
Jenny took her top off after several minutes, showing her full teenage breasts, which were barely being held by the red lace bra. I reached behind her back and unclasped the bra hook, letting the red lingerie slip off her. With my hormonal side now completely in control of my body, I began licking Jenny's round tits, causing her to gasp and hum in bliss.
As I sucked on her nipples, I moved my hand down and undid her tight skimpy shorts. She slowly pushed them down her smooth thighs, along with her panties.
“Adrian, I want you to lick my pussy, I've always wanted to know what it feels like.” She said as her whole body trembled in arousal.
“As you wish.” I said dryly. She looked into my eyes and gained a warm smile.
“So you are human after all.” She said, apparently seeing something within me, regardless of my empty tone..
I silently crouched down as she spread her legs, showing me her pussy. I held my face just inches the soft lips, which were already wet with arousal. My primal hormonal side was savoring the fruity aroma and the proximity. I experimentally reached out with my tongue and brought it up between the wet lips, causing her to arch her back and moan in ecstasy. The taste of her juices was a very peculiar one, both bitter and sweet.
I gave a broad lick, thoroughly enjoying the taste and feel of her pussy on my tongue. Jenny moaned again, laying back across the table. I worked my tongue in a rhythm, exploring her hot wet insides as much as I could with my limited reach. It was almost like sending my tongue into an orange with every fiber soaking wet and held together loosely. Jenny was gripping the edges of the table, giving a continuous high-pitched moan and blushing all over.
“Oh god Adrian, you're driving me crazy!” She gasped.
I stood up and undressed, standing over Jenny. I gripped my erect manhood and guided it to her pussy, slowly pushing it in. Jenny emitted a crystal-clear chime, like that of a bell. With my hands on her hips, I began moving back and forth in a steady pattern, sending my cock deep inside her. With her perpendicular to me, I was able to get great penetration, thrusting my cock all the way in.
Strangely, Jenny seemed much more calm than before. She had a look of sleepy bliss on her face, only giving the softest of coos with each thrust. Her eyes were closed and she was gently running her fingertips along her smooth skin, almost as if she was just waking up from a nap. It almost looked like the ecstasy that had stimulated her body before was now relaxing it, almost like a massage.
I reached down and picked her up with my hands beneath her back. Surprised and unbalanced, Jenny wrapped her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I fully held her up off the ground, using only my arms to bring her up and down on my cock. Jenny had a tired smile on her base and was blushing as I lifted her up and down.
“I love you Adrian.” She said tenderly as she ran her fingers through my hair.
In reply I held her up against the wall, using it to lessen her weight on my body. Reawakened by the resulting thrust, Jenny reached up and held onto a pipe above her head for dear life. She resumed her hymn of moans as I used the angle to probe a new corner of her pussy, relishing the feeling of her hot wet insides. Everything on the wall rattled with each thrust as I put every drop of strength I had into satisfying her. As my stamina began to drop, Jenny's body began to tremble.
“Adrian, I'm going to cum.” She whispered in my ear.
With my last ounce of strength, I increased my speed, sending my cock into her as hard and fast as possible. Finally, Jenny and I both had a simultaneous orgasm, soaking each other in DNA. Jenny collapsed in my arms, with her own arms hanging limp and her chin on my shoulder. I could barely feel my legs, making it a struggle to stay on my feet. I stepped back and sat down on a nearby chair, holding Jenny as we both tried to catch our breath.
Her long blond hair was stretched across her face, and every breath I took brought with it the sweet smell of her perfume and sawdust from the table. I had Jenny pressed against me so tightly that we could feel each other's heartbeats, and our combined body heat was as intense as a furnace. As my erection lost its luster, so did my heart's control over my body. It slowly went back to sleep, returning power to my logical mind.
With my semi-hard dick still inside her, Jenny leaned back. She had one of the warmest and sweetest smiles I had ever seen, and her eyes seem to glow as she gently ran her fingers through my hair.
“I love you Adrian, I love you so much.” She murmured. She then pressed her cheek against mine and whispered,
“And you will never need to say that you love me, because I will always know that you do. Whenever we make love, I can feel your heart, even if you can't. I know that you love me, and as long as I can sense that you keep me close to your heart, you will never have to say it.”
She leaned back again and gave another warm smile.
“Jenny...” I said softly. In reply, she placed her soft hand on my cheek and kissed me.
Jenny and I were walking down a hallway at school, with Jenny clinging to my arm and leaning her head on my shoulder. Everyone was looking at us in the corners of their eyes with disbelief. When our relationship started, we had neither told anyone about it nor kept it a secret. Jenny met up with me on monday morning, we kissed for several seconds, and the resulting gasp of shock from everyone was deafening. Everyone in the school always assumed I would never enter a relationship because of my lack of emotions and they couldn't imagine any girl being able to tolerate me for very long.
If Obama had been born in Kenya, had a swastika imprinted on his face, and had been to rehab several times for a drug problem, he would have still become president before I decided I wanted a girlfriend, let alone gotten one. That should pretty much summarize my reputation as “Adroid”. We had been in a relationship for a month, but people still looked at us like we were a pot of leprechaun gold. Everyone's disbelief seemed to grow each day, as they waited in anticipation for our relationship to shatter.
But today there was something else in the hushed muttering. There was a piece of news floating around and it was obviously important.
“Well if it isn't the fucking terminator!” A course voice laughed.
Everyone looked down the hall at the senior who had called out. He was almost six feet tall, had short blond hair, had a sadistic look in his eyes, and he was dressed like a cliché bad boy. His name was Ben and he was the school bully. He had been tormenting people since middle school, was cruel and twisted to everyone, and he always only got a slap on the wrist... until the last time.
He and his friends had just spent six months in juvenile hall because they beat a kid up enough to send him to the hospital. With the end of the school year approaching, they had been allowed to come back and graduate “with their old friends”. We were all surprised that it had taken that long to get him and his friends locked up. He beat people up constantly, had been seen taking and even selling drugs, and there was even a rumor that he had date-raped a girl at a party.
I was often a target of his harassment because he constantly wanted to try and get a reaction out of me. With my emotions and my temper nonexistent with my dominant logical side, I was immune to his attempts, but that didn't keep him from trying over and over. It was like an unstoppable force colliding with and unmovable object. He once tried to fight me, but made sure to never make that mistake again.
Everyone was silent as Ben approached, stepping back and opening up the hallway. Jenny didn't take a single step, but her grip on my arm tightened and I could feel her shaking. She too had history with Ben. He often harassed her as well, grabbing her, making lewd comments, and practically forcing himself on her. My mind was running countless scenarios every second, planning out every possible choice of action.
“Jenny, don't tell me you're dating this loser now. If you want a robot dick to fuck, get a vibrator.” He cackled.
“Your words carry no purpose other than to cause distress. Only sadists seek to inflict harm without reason. Are you saying that you are a horrible person, as defined by the term 'sadist'?” I asked, cocking my head to one side.
“Shut the fuck up you emo freak.” He countered.
“Your use of the phrase emo is incorrect. Emo is someone who portrays their emotions excessively, and according to what people say about me, I am almost the exact opposite. Will you continue or would you like to rephrase your last statement?” I asked like a google search result for a misspelled term.
I could feel Jenny's grip around my arm becoming more relaxed. She was feeling relieved, watching me turn the school bully into a yipping lapdog.
Ben just chuckled and began to walk by me. My brain was saturated with adrenalin in preparation for a very likely physical confrontation. I was planning everything out from how to keep Jenny safe to how to counterattack, should Ben try to hurt Jenny or myself. With all of the adrenalin coursing through me, my reaction time was heightening, slowing down my perception of time and allowing my brain to process thoughts at a far greater rate than when relaxed.
As he took his second step past me, I heard him take a sharp intake of breath, commonly preceding a fast or aggressive movement. As fast as I could, I pushed Jenny out of harm's way and ducked. Ben's fist flew right over my head, and before he could react, I spun around, reached up, and punched him in the nose. He staggered back, gripping his broken nose and giving a muffled howl of pain. I turned so that my left side had optimal reach and then kicked him in the stomach, making him buckle.
I stepped back, making sure that Jenny was safe. She was standing on the sidelines with her eyes full of worry. I turned back to Ben as he charged with his fist pulled back. I stepped to the side to dodge his punch, and with my right hand on my left fist, I jabbed forward with my left elbow. With adrenalin increasing my reaction time, everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. I calculated and adjusted the angle of my elbow, ensuring that the force of the impact would be fully directed to my forearms instead of the joint. I slammed my elbow against his chin, sending him sprawling back. Before he could recover, I hooked my foot around his ankle and knocked him off balance, sending him falling down onto his back.
“What the hell is going on in here?!” I heard. Everyone turned their attention to the principle, who was standing at the very back of the crowd.
“Merely an argument that took an unfortunate turn, Principle Smith. Nothing more than a physical disagreement.” I answered calmly.
Ben and I were questioned extensively on what went happened in the hallway, along with several witnesses. With his face bloody, Ben did nothing but curse me and the principle while saying that he was the victim, while I answered every question calmly and with detail.
Jenny was waiting on a bench beside the principle's office when I stepped out. She immediately bolted up and wrapped her arms around my neck.
“Adrian, what happened?” She asked.
“I was let off with a warning. Because of Ben's history, testimonies from kids who watched the fight, and my years of good behavior, the principle didn't think I was a cause of the fight. Ben is on probation and will be expelled if he attacks anyone again.”
“Oh, I'm so relieved.” She sighed with her head on my shoulder. She then pulled away from we with an excited smile on her face.
“Where did you learn to fight like that?!” She asked.
“My body is a tool, it is an instrument of my brain. All tools must be kept in prime condition for optimum efficiency. I keep my body in good shape and I combine my quick-responsive logical side with my physical attributes, allowing me to calculate the best course of action in terms of a fighting move.” I replied with a small modest smile.
“I know you consider it idiotic when people say stuff like this, but I am so hot for you right now.” She whispered in my ear.
It had been a week since the fight, and Jenny and I were walking out of a movie theater. It was ten pm on saturday and we were heading back to my car.
“Come on, let's cut through the park.” Jenny said, playfully tugging on my arm. I kept my arm tense so that my hand stayed in my pocket.
“I really wish you hadn't brought that thing.” She sighed.
“I'm sorry, but I just wanted to test it's portability.” I said. To cheer her up, I wrapped my other arm around her and kissed her on the forehead. Jenny looked at me with surprise.
“You've never kissed me anywhere but the lips.” She said warmly. I gave a small smile and we entered the park. The park was empty and silent, with the only light coming from the few streetlamps. We were halfway through the park, walking along the precipice of s all plot of forest.
“So how did you like the movie?” I asked, halfway through the park.
“It was good, but I hate how people who wake up in hospitals automatically rip everything away from their arms and stagger out into the hall. There is a reason why hospital beds have call buttons. It's so illogical.” She said. I chuckled, almost making her jump in surprise.
“You're becoming more like me.” I said.
Just as I spoke the words, a hard object slammed into the back of my head, knocking me down. I heard several footsteps along with a scream from Jenny as my face hit the cold pavement of the sidewalk. With my senses scrambled by the impact, I struggled to get back to my feet. Ben and two of his friends were standing in front of me, with Ben ripping off Jenny's shirt. He wrapped his arm her neck with his hand over her mouth as he pulled her shirt away, leaving only her bra. Even if she could scream, the park was completely empty. I took a step forward but stopped as Ben pulled out a cell phone.
“It's payback time, motherfucker. If you take another step, you're girlfriend's cunt is going to be seen by everyone in the reach of facebook.” He said. Jenny gave a stifled scream and tears rolled down her face at Ben's words.
I stood still as a statue with my heart beating a mile a minute and my brain drowning in adrenalin. I was feeling something, something new. The best word I could find to describe it was... rage. I tried to suppress this new emotion, because I needed my mind to be as clear as possible.
“Jake, Sam, go ahead. Asshole, if you take a single step, I'll rip all of her clothes off and might even have some fun with her.” Ben laughed.
I took a deep breath as his two cronies walked over to me, chuckling sadistically. Jake pulled back his fist and punched me in the side of the face, knocking me back to the ground. The impact completely jarred my mind, making it almost impossible to think. My mental abilities were well-honed enough to let me block pain, but I could not prevent the ramifications of an impact to the head.
I slowly stood up, using every second to build up tolerance to my next attack. Sam kneed me in the stomach with enough force to make me cough up blood. I swayed from side to side, struggling to stay on my feet. I also made sure that my right arm did not become straight. Jake punched me again and I spat out a mouthful of blood. Jenny quietly cried as Sam slammed his elbow down onto my back, knocking me once again to the ground. I did not give a single groan of pain or expression of discomfort; I just got back to my feet with my chin up.
Sam and Jake continued beating me, punching me wherever would hurt the most. I just focused on Jenny's tear-filled eyes, finding comfort in them. Her muffled sobs could just barely be heard through Ben's hand.
“Sam, take this and carve up his face.” Ben said as he reached into his pocket for a knife.
The second his phone was away from Jenny, I acted. I reached into my pocket and pulled out one of my darts. I always made sure to keep them on me when out in public (but not in school). I threw the dart, and even with my battered body, my impeccable aim lodged it in his arm, causing him to drop the phone. With that quick opportunity, Jenny bit Ben's hand as hard as she could. Ben threw her to the side, howling in pain from the inch of metal lodged in his arm and the bleeding bite wound in his hand.
With Ben's cronies distracted, I reached down with my right hand, finally straightening out my arm. There was a loud cracking sound and long steel spike slid out of my sleeve, measuring almost a meter long. The middle of the spike had a hinge under high tension, and it would instantly lock into position if the two parts were straightened out. Not only was this function perfect for concealment, but the hinges and locking mechanism were so strong that the spike could support my full weight. The weapon was meant to be kept in the sleeve, with the elbow next to the hinges. The owner only had to point their hand down and straighten their arm and the erect spike would slide into their hand.
Along with my ultimate creation, something else was released as well. The rage that had been created when Ben grabbed Jenny was erupting in my heart, but also fusing with my logical machine-like side. The result was an icy desire to slaughter my enemies, with all aspects of remorse and guilt being crushed under it's fury. With the steel spike in my hand, I struggled to fight the urge to kill.
I lashed out and slammed Jake in the throat, causing him to fall to his knees, gasping for air. I slammed him in the back of the back of the head and he fell flat on the ground. I turned around as Sam tried to punch me. I blocked his fist with the shaft of the spike, busting up Sam's hand. As he roared in pain, I raised the spike and stabbed him in the foot. Before he could scream, I pulled a right hook to the jaw, shattering several of his teeth and ripping apart his lips.
Gasping for air, Jake slowly got to his feet and stumbled towards me. I raised the spike and brought it down, slashing him from shoulder to hip. Even though the weapon had no blade and the wound was shallow, the tip was sharper than a nail and sliced open the muscle. He would live, but wouldn't be getting up any time soon. I turned as Ben charged towards me with his knife in his hand.
He jabbed forward with his knife and I reached out with my hand. The blade stabbed me through the palm, sending drops of my blood splattering on my face. Ben stared in disbelief at the lack of reaction. My rage and mechanical mind were completely blocking out the pain, granting me the power to continue fighting. Without making a sound, I stabbed him through the shoulder. The spike pierced the thick muscle and broke his bones with ease.
Ben screamed in pain, and before he could step back, I twisted his arm, forcing him to his knees. I kept twisting, dislocating his other shoulder. I then stepped back and slashed him several times across the back, leaving deep bloody gashes. Ben was gagging in agony, unable to even scream. I raised the spike, about to deliver the killing blow. Jenny rushed over to me and grabbed my arms.
“No Adrian, please don't!” She screamed desperately. In my blood-drunk stupor, I did not hear her.
“Adrian!” She cried out again, somewhat shaking me out of it.
“I must kill him. I must kill my enemy.” I said coldly.
“No Adrian, you don't.” She cried. She then moved her hands to my cheeks.
“You don't have to do this. You choose your own actions. You choose your own fate. You choose what you do, you aren't a machine.” She begged.
I gasped as her words fully broke through my bloodlust. My hands slackened around the spike.
“If you kill him, the police will lock you away forever and I cannot bear to be without you. If you kill him then you will have to kill me too, because I don't want to live without you. Come back to me, come back to me Adrian.” She said softly.
My breathing was hoarse as I slowly calmed down my mind, separating my rage from my logical side and extinguishing the fires of anger. The spike fell out of my hand and imbedded itself in the ground. After several seconds, her expression softened.
“Why did you react that way? Why did you become so angry?” She asked desperately. I looked at her in confusion.
“You have never been this angry before, so what changed now?” She asked, almost as if she were trying to pull my mind from my body.
“I... I...” I began.
“Just say it, not for me but for yourself. Why did you react like this? Why did you do this?” She asked with tears running from her eyes but with the smallest of smiles on her face.
“I did it because... because I love you.” I said.
Jenny's smile widened and she gave a deep sigh of relief, finally hearing what she was trying to get me to say..
“You are not a machine, you are a man, the man I love and man who loves me. It feels so good to hear your feelings for me.” She said softly.
“I am sorry Jenny. I am so, so sorry.” I replied with my whole body shaking.
“It's OK, my love, it's OK.” She said before kissing me.
“These three can take care of themselves. Come on, let's get your hand fixed up and go home.” She said, holding my hands.
“As you wish... my love.” I replied.
With Jenny's hands wrapped tightly around mine, we walked away.
Read 11190 times | Rated 91 (78 votes)
Please rate this text: