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this is my first story. there's a lot of background i didn' include but this is the only way i could write it, sorry, tips are appreciated.

Terran was nervous.
He had been called to meet with his captain and he knew why. He was not in trouble, he'd had been one of the few men to stand when they had been asked who was willing to do what was necessary to be the captains new right hand.
Terrans captain was different from the rest, he was....odd. To be his right hand you had to abide by his religious beliefs and be his partner as well. He didn't trust normal warriors enough to let them have a voice come decision making time, he had to trust them on a spiritual level. All of the men knew what this entailed. Which is why only three men rose from their knees and stood at full attention in front of all the others.
Terran had been the one he chose, he told himself this over and over again to calm his nerves. His reasons for standing were mixed. He did want a higher position in the Rat army, but he was also very interested in his captain and his...preferences.
The captains tent loomed before him and he wondered what waited for him behind this curtain, how would his future with the other men be if he accepted the position after their first interview, They would all know what went on between him and his captain behind this curtain. He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and pulled the curtain to the side.
The captain was sitting on his knees behind a short table. His long blond hair was loose, Terran had never seen it out of it's usual braided pony tail. His face really was too beautiful to belong to a man, his lips were soft and pink, his nose was straight and not too long, and his chin was rounded but still strong. Terran would never openly admit it to himself but he was very attracted to his captain.
The captain noticed Terran standing in the door way, staring at him. He gave him a stunning smile and waved him in. Terran walked to his captain and sat down next to him stiffly. The captain turned to him.
“First we're going to have some tea, and then we will continue with the interview. But before that I have to be sure you fully understand what comes with this position.” The captain said, looking meaningfully into the young warriors eyes.
“I know what you require of your right hands and I'm aware of the way you're religion works.” Terran said, trying to convince the both of them he was confident and ready for what was coming. The captain smiled again.
“What I ask of my right hands does not come from my religion, it comes from my own self, it comes from my need to be able to completely trust them. My religion is just more accepting than yours. Or the common religion of the warriors, I should say, I don't know if you actually follow it.” He explained.
“I do, but I’m afraid I’ll have to abandon it for this position.” Terran replied.
“And you're ready to do that?” The captain asked. Terran nodded.

The two had their tea and made polite conversation. Terran was feeling much more comfortable by the time the captain was ready to proceed.
“You have to assure me that you're ready for our full interview, because once we start I will not stop.” The captain warned.
“I'm ready, sir.” Terran said bravely, the captain admired it.
The captains hand rose to touch Terran’s' cheek. He stroked it a few times looking over the young mans face appreciatively. It was lovely, rugged but still smooth with youth. His lips were rough from dessert winds but given some time and proper care they'd soon be full and moist. He stroked the bottom lip and the boys breath caught in his throat. The captain knew from that moment he'd made the right choice. If they boy hadn't reacted to the tender touches then he was only looking for a better position and couldn't be trusted.
The captain slid his hand around to the back of the boys head and pulled their faces close together, close enough for their noses to be touching. “I need to stop thinking of him as a boy. He's not, even if he does seem as innocent as one.” He thought to himself.
“You're sure you want this?” He asked the young man. Terran nodded quickly.
The captain leaned in and brushed his lips against the boys. He jerked back at first but the captain held his head steady and laid a full kiss on him. He stayed like that until he felt the boy relax slightly, then pushed him farther. He sucked on the boys bottom lip and wrapped his other arm tightly around the boys back. He tensed again and tried to wiggle out of the captains grip. The captain pulled back without releasing him.
“I warned you that I wouldn't stop once we've started, just try and relax. Have you ever been with a woman.?” He asked, the boy shook his head shyly. The captain smiled. “Then I suppose you can't think of one of them.” he said and went back to sucking on the boys bottom lip.
Eventually the boy did relax. he parted his lips slightly and the captain swooped in. He claimed the boys mouth and gently stroked Terran's tongue with his own. When the boy started to return the kiss he loosened his grip around his middle, moved his hand farther down, and began to rub they boys hip with his thumb. His hand was still in the boys hair and he used this hand to gently direct him to lay down on the floor.
Terran was still shocked he was in this position at all. His captain was on top of him one hand wrapped in his hair, the other firmly grasping his hip, and his tong was in his mouth. The captains mouth tasted sweet like the tea they'd been drinking and his soft blond hair fell onto Terran's face in incense perfumed waves. He wasn't sure what to do with his hands, so he wrapped his arms around the older mans neck. The captain smiled into the kiss and moved from the boys mouth to his neck.
The nipping and sucking that followed nearly drove Terran insane, he wanted it to last as long as it could, but he also wanted to move on to what ever was coming next. He'd been so caught up with the trail of fire the captain was leaving along his collar that he hadn't noticed the captain trying to pull his shirt off. Terran helped him get it the rest of the way off and the captain went right to his nipples. Soon they were erect and sensitive. Every time the captains tongue moved across one of them he had to fight back a moan. Which ever nipple wasn't in the captains mouth was being stroked lovingly by the hand that was not in Terran's hair.
The captain pulled away and put his mouth next to Terran's ear. “We should move to the bed.” he whispered giving the lobe a quick nip. Terran began to stand up but in his disoriented state he apparently wasn't moving fast enough for the captain, who bent down and picked him up. He laid Terran down on the bed gently, kissing his lips before undressing them both.
He then climbed on top of the young man. Their naked bodies tangled around each other and they lost themselves in a flurry of hot kisses. The captain pulled away again to work his way down. He spared sometime for each nipple and continued down leaving a trail of kisses. Terran's manhood was standing tall and the captain massaged the skin around the base with his tong while rubbing Terran's sides and lower stomach.
Terran couldn't contain his moans now and they fell from his lips one right after the other. The captain kissed his way to the top of Terran’s member and began to lick small circles around the tip. Terran threw his head back in ecstasy. The captain moved on to take the tip wholly into his mouth and ran his tong around it slowly. He got Terran nearly there before stopping. Terran gave him a desperate look, but the captain just smiled and reached for a small gold tin next to his bed.
He laid it down next to his knee and picked up Terran's legs. He put them onto his shoulders, parted just enough for Terran's cheeks to stay parted. He picked up the tin and removed the lid.
Inside there was a light green jell that smelled wonderful. The captain took some into his hand and warmed it up before applying it to Terran's hole. He began by gently massaging the outside of his hole with it and slowly worked with the pucker. Before he went any farther he took some time to admire the small pink thing. It had obviously never been used and was perfect.
He began to work one finger into the hole. Terran squirmed and made small noises of protest. The captain kept going.
“Shh. Just relax and let it in, the more you resist the longer the feeling of wrongness will last. The jelly should take effect soon anyway.” He calmly told His young companion.
Terran tried his hardest to relax but the feeling was just too foreign. But the captain was right, soon the jelly began to tingle warmly and he felt his muscles relax.
The captains finger went in slowly and he moved it around to open him up a little. After he felt that the jelly was taking effect inside too he began putting in a second finger and Terran moaned loudly. When he got it in he began to work with Terran's hole again drawing another moan from him.
Terran felt his hole stretch with the addition of the second finger, with the help of the jelly it felt amazing right off the bat. He'd been told by a warrior that knew the captains last right hand that it was suppose to hurt the first few times you tried this type of sex. But it didn't hurt, it was amazing. When the third finger slipped in Terran felt he was going to die if he didn't soon have the captain himself in him, he'd never been so desperate for anything before.
“Captain, please I don't-ah- I don't think I can take this much longer, you need to-to, do what you're going to do.” He begged.
“i will, but I need to make sure you can take it.” He said smiling at the boy. Terran couldn't find the words he wanted to say so he settled for moaning again.
After a few more moments of torture the captain decided it was time to let the boy have what he wanted, and too fulfill himself as well.
He took a small amount of the jelly into his hand and applied in liberally to himself. He grabbed Terran's hips and lined everything up. At first he teased the boy by prodding him but never entering. Finally, after listening to the boys desperate whimpers, he began to slowly push himself into the tight hole.
Terran's mouth flew open as his hole stretched to accommodate the captains large member.
He didn't even moan, he couldn't. This, this hurt and he now understood why the captain wanted him ready. His manhood was very thick and long, Terran wasn't sure he could take it all. But after it was all in he was able to take a breath and close his mouth. He was settling into the fullness, the pain faded away. suddenly he didn't want the fullness to go away. But then the captain started to move, in and out, slowly and with precision. Every time he moved back into Terran he hit a spot that sent waves of pleasure shooting through his body.
The slow pace was pleasant, but the captain was having a hard time not shoving into the boy with all of his strength. He looked at they boys face which was twisted in pleasure; his mouth hung open and he was panting heavily, he moaned continuously. The captain decided to throw his control to the wind and pulled out until only the tip was in and rammed himself into the young boy as hard as he could. Terran yelled and the captain stopped.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked, panting. Terran shook his head.
“No, keep going.” he panted.
The captain started to ram into him again, still hitting that spot. He was moaning loudly and wished he could do something to stop it, he was sure everyone could hear him. The captain on the other hand wasn't making any noise except for a few labored breaths. He caught Terran staring at him and the locked eyes.
“You were the perfect choice, Terran.” the captain said, puffing after each word. He then grabbed Terran's manhood and began to pump up and down in time with his thrusts. The combination was enough to set Terran off. He came long and hard, covering his stomach in white strings.
It only took a few more thrusts for the captain after seeing the boys face screwed up in orgasm. He gave a few more thrusts as he was cumming inside this lovely young boy, yes he had chosen right.
Terran felt the warmth shooting out of the captain fill his hole and loved it. The captain pulled out, leaving him empty, and wiped them both clean before crawling up next to Terran and pulling him into his arms.
He was worn out, it was his first time after all, and soon Terran was asleep in his captains arms. He brushed the curly dark hair out of they boys face and kissed his sweaty cheek before settling down to sleep himself.
“I'll have to remember to tell him to call me Ren from now on.” he thought to himself as he drifted off to sleep.
1 comments

anonymous readerReport

2011-01-20 12:58:04
Nice first story!
Just enough detail to be able to place the story in almost any genre, be it Sci-fi, horror, or just plain, pure, simple sex.
I'd love to see the story fleshed out to the max.

One note, though: a "tong" is a tool for picking things up, unless this IS sci-fi and his "tongue" is really a "tong".

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