Gender: Female Age: 57 Location: N/A
|Introduction: A Catholic schoolgirl explores the feelings of being naked outdoors and becomes a committed exhibitionist.|
It started when I was still a teenager, though I don't remember exactly how old I was. I was the oldest of five children in a Roman Catholic family. Besides me, there was one other girl, Pauline, who was second youngest and we had three brothers, Robert, Jacob, and David.
Robert was about 15 months younger than me and there was a lot of sibling rivalry, with quite a bit of fighting between the two of us. He would always accuse me of being mom's favorite, which was probably true, since I was a “good” girl, always getting straight “A”s in school and helping out around the house, while he barely got by in school, not because he wasn't smart, but because he didn't apply himself. I, on the other hand felt he got away with a lot more than he should and I was always quick to point out any of his shenanigans to our parents.
Because we were Catholic my parents insisted on sending us to parochial schools and the tuition payments kept us poor. I even pointed out to my mom that it was just wasted on Bobby since he didn't study, but she didn't listen. Grade school was bad enough but I especially didn't want him going to high school with me and I stepped up my efforts when he was in the eighth grade. A lot of Catholic high schools are single sex, but the one we went to was co-ed. I even made up a balance sheet to show them how much money they'd save by sending him to public school but to no avail. My dad just said, “So? We'd save twice that much by sending you to public school too.” Looking back I guess I was kind of a brat and maybe I did kind of deserve a lot of what eventually happened to me, but I'm getting ahead of myself.
Despite all my efforts, Bobby and I ended up in the same high school, Sacred Heart. I was a junior when he started as a freshman because even though he was 15 months younger, he was too young by a couple of months to enter school the year behind me. As a result I was one of the youngest students in my grade and he was one of the oldest in his.
I have to go back now and explain how I got started doing what eventually got me into trouble. All the time I was growing up we didn't have a big car or anything. We did have a mini-van but it was a smaller one and squeezing all seven of us into it got to be a chore as we got bigger. After a while, my parents began to leave me home alone when they took the other kids out certain places. I had outgrown things like Sesame Street on Ice and so forth anyway.
At first I just enjoyed the quiet time by myself. I used the time to do things like read, study, or try out different makeup and stuff. Bobby asked to stay home too, but my parents knew better. They knew we'd fight if we were alone together, so it was just me. That's when it started.
I hadn't intended to do anything “bad,” the first time was really just an accident really. One of the things I liked to do when I was alone was take a bath. With five kids and one bathroom, I rarely had time to soak in the tub without one or another of them pounding on the bathroom door, so I took advantage of the solitude to lounge with some nice bath salts.
Well, this one time I was in the bathroom, getting ready to take my bath when I realized I had forgotten my bath salts in my room. I started to put on my robe to go and get them when I realized I didn't really need to wear the robe since there was no one home to see me. For some strange reason the idea of being out in the hall, going to my room and back naked, intrigued me.
I opened the bathroom door and peaked out. The house was silent. I knew my family shouldn't be coming home for hours yet, but what if they came home early for some reason? What if they were already home, but I didn't hear them come in with the bathroom door closed? My brothers and sister couldn't keep THAT quiet, the house was empty.
Cautiously I crept out into the hall. Even though I knew I couldn't be seen by anyone, something about just being naked where I shouldn't be had me excited. My nipples were hard and it wasn't from cold, I had turned the heat up before my bath. I tiptoed, I don't know why, but I literally tiptoed the short distance through the hall to my room.
Once in the safety of my room I gathered up my bath things and headed back to the bathroom. I paused at the door and again peeked out into the hallway. There still wasn't anyone in the house of course, but going back to the bathroom my back would be to the stairway, if there were anyone in the house, they would see my naked backside as I walked through the hall. The thought excited me and I quickly walked back to the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind me.
My heart was pounding. It seemed like all my senses were heightened. I ran my bath and got in. I might have been a good Catholic girl, but I wasn't so good that I didn't masturbate, and I did now, cumming harder than I ever had before! The adrenaline rush! It was addicting and I was hooked.
From then on things escalated. Being naked in the upstairs hall only got me my adrenaline fix for a little while. Soon, very soon, I needed more than that. It was a cycle I soon recognized. I would get my fix and, still wanting to be a good, Catholic girl, I would tell myself, “There, I proved how daring I am, now I never have to do it again.” Then, in a couple of weeks, days, or sometimes after even just a few hours, I needed it again, with each time needing to be more daring than the last.
Being naked in the upstairs hallway only worked for awhile. Before long though, I began leaving my clothes in my room and creeping down the stairs. My family was gone of course, but my heart was beating a mile a minute. There was a short flight of four steps, then the stairway turned right and eight more steps to the first floor.
The stairs led straight toward the front door and, once on the landing, I could see it. Our front door had a very large oval pane of beveled glass covered with a sheer curtain. I know you couldn't see in as easily as you could see out, but as I got to the bottom couple of steps I could see out very well indeed.
The first time all I wanted to do was go to the bottom of the stairs, to touch the first floor with my bare feet. That would be enough, I told myself, to satisfy this insane craving to be naked. As I got to the last step, I told myself that I needed to touch the door, just to “prove” that I was all the way down the stairs.
That final step, nothing between my naked body and the outdoors but that pane of glass and that flimsy curtain. I touched the door. I did it! I hurried back upstairs, certain that I had faced the ultimate challenge, this would be the last time I told myself. Back in the upstairs hall I didn't want it to end. I sat on the top step, right next to my parent's bedroom door and masturbated, cumming hard on my adrenaline high. As soon as I came I jumped up and hurried to my room and got dressed.
Me, the Nudist
I'm not going to cover in detail every step along the way, but I gradually increased both the distance and the time away from my room until I had been naked in every room in the house, including the attic, basement and all the bedrooms, and would stay naked pretty much the entire time I was alone. I would do any chores my mom assigned me before they left naked. Fold laundry, clean the kitchen, vacuum the living room, I did them all naked.
I'd go about whatever activities I had planned for the day naked. Reading, watching TV, studying or whatever I wanted to do, I did it all naked. If mom had assigned me any chores, I did them first so I would have the rest of the time for myself. By this time I had become pretty jaded. Even walking naked in front of a window wasn't giving me much of a thrill anymore.
One particular day I was cleaning the dining room and I had collected a small bag of trash. I needed to take it out to the garbage can and, still naked, found myself heading that way. Now, it would be an exaggeration to say I almost went out the door naked, but I was heading that way, without even thinking much about it. Nudity had become a natural state for me when I was alone.
That brief moment in which I was heading for the door to go outside got me thinking. Excitement was back and I knew the way to more adrenaline was to go outside naked. But how? I tried going to the back door, standing just inside completely naked. I even opened the door, but I couldn't step outside. It was broad daylight and too great a chance that one of the neighbors would see me.
Standing naked like that in the doorway had gotten me excited and I went back to the living room. My heart was beating fast again and I knew I was going to have to do more but for now I just masturbated. Right there on the couch, knees drawn up and my feet on the edge of the cushion. I could see through the front window and the door. I could see a couple people walking past on the sidewalk. In no time I was cumming, my pussy exposed, facing the front door. Cumming hard again.
While I was still spasming I saw our car pulling into the driveway! I jumped up and ran up the stairs, staying as far from the front door as I could as I did so. That was close, and it got me into the “never again” mode for a while, promising myself that I would be a good girl and not be naked outside of my room or the bathroom any more.
While I fully intended to keep my promise, I soon realized that I couldn't. I started thinking about being naked again, only this time I couldn't stop thinking about doing it outside. I knew I was going to give in to the urge and I formulated a plan.
It would have to be at night, I couldn't do it in daylight so it would have to be while my family was home. My plan was to wait until the exact middle of the night (which I decided was 3:00am) then sneak downstairs, take off my clothes, and go out the side door. The front door was definitely out, and the back door could be seen from the neighbors' houses on both sides. At the side door I only could be spotted from one neighbor's house, and it was darker in the driveway.
I rehearsed various parts of my plan. How would I get up at three am? I put my alarm clock under my pillow and tested that. It worked, waking me up, but was muffled enough that it didn't wake anyone else. I practiced sneaking down the stairs, first during daylight when I was alone, then at night when everyone else was asleep. I got to know every creaky floorboard and stair tread in the house and how to avoid them. No one ever woke up.
I decided I was ready. Besides, I couldn't wait any more! I picked Friday night for my first time, that way I wouldn't be missing sleep before a school day. I was excited all week and that evening I was so nervous I thought everybody could tell, so I went to bed early, around 9:00pm. I couldn't sleep though, laying awake, trying not to touch myself. I wanted to save that for later. I remember looking at my watch and it was midnight, three hours of tossing and turning! I thought I'd never get any sleep.
The next thing I knew, my alarm was buzzing. I had fallen asleep after all. I turned it off and sat up in bed. As soon as I did, my heart was racing in anticipation of what I was going to do. I took a sip of water from my nightstand, “Calm down,” I told myself, trying to pretend it was another practice sneak down the stairs. If anyone woke up, I'd just say I'd gone to bed so early that I woke up hungry and was going downstairs for a snack.
I stood up and took a deep breath. I opened my bedroom door. Except for my father snoring, the house was quiet. I slipped out into the hall and started toward the stairs. Just like practice. I was a bit calmer now as I slowly crept down the stairs. My father's snoring stopped and I froze. After an indeterminable amount of time it started back up and I started back down.
Once on the first floor, I had to cross the living room, dining room and then the kitchen to get to the side door, which was down a short flight of steps. I opened the inner door and looked out. Instead of the almost total darkness I anticipated, it was fairly light in the driveway. I was going to have to start paying more attention to the phases of the moon. It wasn't a full moon, but close enough. I decided I'd come this far and I was going out anyway.
With the inner door open and the storm door still closed, I slipped out of my pajamas, hanging them on one of the coat hooks my father had installed here but we never used because normally we used the front door. Now I was totally naked, except for my watch. I slipped it off too, checking the time before hanging it on one of the coat hooks too. I wanted to be able to say that I had been outside wearing nothing but my skin. Well, I wasn't going to say it to anyone but myself, but I wanted to be completely naked. It was 3:20am.
I took a deep breath. I was strangely calm. My heart rate was up, but not as much as I thought it would be. Without thinking any more on it, I opened the storm door and stepped out onto the driveway, facing the street. I WAS OUTSIDE NAKED! Well, I still had the door open, so I was just barely outside. I closed the door and stepped away from the house, still facing the street. I realized my pale white skin must have stood out in the moonlight and I took one more sidestep, closer to the neighbor's house. Now I was in the shadow of their house.
What a feeling! It was early fall so it was cool but not cold. There was a slight breeze, which I could feel on every inch of my skin! Being naked felt so different! My nipples were all crinkly with cold and excitement, to where they hurt a little. I reached up and brushed them with my palms. Then, with very little warning, I heard an approaching car. Before I could move or duck or anything, it flashed past, headlights and amber running lights followed by red tail lights.
I lost all my courage as soon as the car was past and dashed those two steps back to the door. Quickly I let myself back in, though not so quickly that I wasn't careful to close the door silently. I got my pajamas back on with some difficulty as my feet seemed to want to go down the wrong legs. I sneaked back upstairs, going only a little faster than I had come down.
As soon as I was back in my room I started to shiver. Maybe it was colder out than I thought. I tried to check my watch but it wasn't on my wrist. I'd left it hanging by the door. Well, I wasn't going to get it now, I set my alarm for 8:00am so I could go down and get it early. I crawled under the covers, still shivering and thought about what I had done.
I had been outside completely naked! Not one stitch on! If the driver of that car had happened to glance my way as it sped past, he/she might have seen me, a totally naked girl standing in the driveway. I'd finally done what I thought must be the ultimate challenge, outside totally naked! I was still shivering but now it was with excitement as I thought about what I had done, how it felt. I began to masturbate, trying to prolong it as I relived the last hour. Too soon, I was cumming, biting my comforter to keep from moaning out loud.
When I was finished I told myself again that now I wouldn't have to do it any more. What could I do beyond what I had just done? What more was there beyond being naked in the driveway? I fell asleep with the knowledge that I would be a good girl from now on.
Despite my intentions of never doing it again, exactly three weeks later I was once more standing at the side door, naked. There was less of a moon today and it was cloudy and cool but not really cold despite now being mid Autumn. I had tried not to give in, but every time I thought about my last naked venture I realized how limited it had been.I had probably been outside less than a minute, and had only taken a couple of steps away from the door. There hadn't been any real chance of anyone seeing me. The thought of putting myself at risk of being seen was what had gotten me down here again.
I wasn't really sure what I was going to do, but I at least wanted to spend several minutes outside. A couple of days earlier we had been playing Yahtzee and the idea had occurred to me to use a die to determine how many minutes to stay outside. I thought that one minute wouldn't be enough, so I decided to roll one die and multiply the result by two. I had rolled a four, so I told myself I must stay outside at least eight minutes tonight. Because of that I was going to wear my watch.
I looked at my watch now, pushing the little button to make the face glow. 3:13. I pushed the door open carefully and stepped out closing the storm door silently behind me. The night air felt as good as before on my naked skin and I stepped away from the door to the middle of the driveway. My father had left the car parked in the driveway tonight and it was between me and the street.
I looked at the car. The back of it extended past the front of our house, closer to the street. I decided that to really prove I was daring, I needed to go around the car and come back to here. That little walk would get me much further from the door, much closer to the street, and into the light from the street lamps. It would use up some, maybe all of my eight minutes too.
I listened carefully but didn't hear any cars or anything. Moving in a half crouch, I walked toward the car, stopping about even with the front bumper. I leaned forward and looked up and down the street, nothing. I looked at the houses across the street, all dark. My heart was beating wildly again, the adrenaline pumping through me. My biology teacher had told us about the “fight or flight” response and I knew that's what I was feeling, adrenaline.
I looked up and down the street one more time and started around the car. I decided to stand up straight and forced myself to walk at a normal pace, speeding up only when I was almost all the way around the car. I got in front of the car and squatted down. I had done it! I checked my watch. Only about four or five minutes gone.
I had calmed down a little and I thought about going back around the car the other direction. I half stood up to check for traffic. Well darn! There was a car heading my way from far up the street to my right. I squatted back down. I should go back up the driveway between the houses before the car got here, I told myself. I checked on the car again. He was closer, obviously, but still far enough away that I could safely stand up and walk up the drive without danger of being seen.
I hesitated while I watched him get closer. I decided to stay put, squatting in front of the car while he passed. If I squatted real small and stayed close to the front of the car, I was in shadow and was pretty confident he wouldn't see me. I had no choice now anyway. I had hesitated so long that if I stood up now I was sure he would see me.
I almost kissed the front grill as I mashed myself against that front bumper while the car drove past. He was going a lot slower than the car that sped by on my first time outside, but not terribly slow, and he didn't seem to slow or pause as he passed, reassuring me that I hadn't been spotted. I checked my watch again and there were still at least a couple minutes to go.
I could feel the cool air on my pussy, opened by my squatting position, and opened even wider as I tried to flatten myself against the car. I realized I was very wet down there. I touched myself. REALLY wet. I started to rub my pussy, getting some of the moisture on my clitty, letting it feel the cool night air. I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop. I made myself cum.
As soon as I came I wanted inside. I got up and ran to the door and let myself back in. I was trembling as I got back into my pajamas. As silently as I could I made my way back upstairs. I couldn't believe what I had done, masturbated outside! Back in my bed I had to masturbate again. Again I couldn't imagine anything more outrageous. I'd never have to do this again, for sure this time.
The next day was Saturday so there was no school but I got up early anyway. I got dressed and went outside and I stood right in front of the car, on the spot where I masturbated last night. Certainly there was no way I'd ever top that I thought. Standing there made me want to masturbate again so I went back inside.
Over the next several days I masturbated a lot, something not so good for a good Catholic girl's conscience. I couldn't stop thinking about how it felt, being naked, hiding behind the car and making myself cum.
There was a cold snap over the next few weeks and that helped keep my thoughts away from going back outside, at least for awhile.
For the next few weeks I tried real hard to resist my desire to be naked outside. The fact that it got bitterly cold for awhile helped but I still kept masturbating a lot. I thought that might help too, by taking the edge off my desire to be naked, and it did, a little, but only temporarily. Maybe because what I was thinking about while masturbating was being naked outside, the desires would only come back, and stronger. My Catholic upbringing kept telling me I was sinful, but I just couldn't stop thinking about it.
If it had stayed cold forever, maybe I could have resisted, but one day, I think in December, it warmed up. I think it got over 60f and as soon as it did, I knew I had to get my outside fix. It wasn't even a weekend, but a school night the next time I went out. Taking advantage of the warm weather to get my adrenaline had become more important to me then getting enough sleep on a school night.
I didn't even do much that third time, just trying to walk around as nonchalantly as I could. Just your average naked girl, walking up and down in her driveway. I didn't have any close calls with cars or anything. I even stood out in the open near the front of the drive for a while, just trying to act as normal as I could. I did masturbate outside for the second time, though that was back in the shadows between the houses, standing near the side door. I did it standing straight up, feet spread and hips thrust forward, sort of presenting my pussy to the street. I even stood there for a little while after I came this time before going back inside.
Well, giving in after resisting for so long seemed to break all my resistance. After that I just became a little adrenaline junkie. Just like when I was extending my boundaries inside when left alone, I did the same things outside. Every time I had to go a little further, stay out a little longer or take a bigger risk in some way in order to get my fix.
Just as with inside, I'm not going to go into every little detail about how I went from those first couple of steps out the side door, to spending hours outside, and roaming blocks away from my house, that would take too much time and isn't really the story I want to tell you. I am going to tell you a few of the things I learned along the way, however.
One thing I learned is that when it's very cold out, the main thing that's going to bother you is your feet. Oh, if it's really windy and cold, you're going to feel it, but if the wind is calm, it can be below freezing, or even down near zero, and as long as you wear shoes to protect your feet from the frozen ground, you can stay out a remarkably long time.
I also found out that it is a good idea to wear shoes for other reasons. I was afraid, especially as I got further from my own yard, of cutting my feet on broken glass, a rusty old tin can, or stepping on a nail or something. I didn't want to have to wake my mom in the middle of the night and have to explain to her that I needed a tetanus shot and stitches because I somehow managed to cut my foot on a rusty tin can at 4:00am.
There were also the worms. I found out that earthworms like to come to the surface at night and I hated stepping on them and feeling them squirm around when I was on grass. I also worried about other insects that might bite or sting me. I did sometimes go without shoes anyway, because I still had a compulsion to be completely naked. Once I even took my earrings out so I didn't even have them on me.
Another thing I learned is that people that are driving around in cars at night aren't paying as much attention to what's happening outside their cars as you would think. Several times I would be in a position where I was certain they would see me and they would just drive on by. No stopping, no slowing down, no honking the horn, nothing. Maybe they were drunk or maybe they just didn't believe their eyes, I don't know.
There were definitely some times when I was seen though. Once a car passed me, then turned around in a driveway up the street and came back, honking the horn while I scrambled up somebody's driveway to hide in their backyard. Another time I saw a man's silhouette against his front curtains as I ran across somebody's lawn across the street from his house. I was sure he could see me because he kind of ducked down and was moving his head back and forth as if to get a better view through the folds in the curtains.
Once a police officer even saw me. By this time I was so comfortable being naked outside that to get my adrenaline rush I would jog recklessly around corners even if I knew a car was coming. One time it was a police car and his brake lights came on immediately. I ducked up a driveway, looking for a place to hide because I was sure he was going to come after me but, for some reason he didn't.
I was smart enough to know that if I kept up my behavior, somebody was going to catch me someday, but I still couldn't stop. In fact, I had become pretty careless and reckless, though the police car incident did make me a bit more cautious for a little while.
Well, there I was. I had become a perverted little Catholic adrenaline junkie girl. Sometimes I stayed out two or even three hours at a time. Sometimes I stayed out till it was actually starting to get light. Once or twice I couldn't resist going out twice in one night if the first time hadn't been risky enough.
The stage was set for my downfall.
To be continued...
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