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Introduction:

Ever had a problem describing the type of hangover you have? Well now you can just say a certain raring to a guy and he SHOULD understand it......... Key word there is 'SHOULD', so don't email me complaining that he doesn't!!
Does any of this sound somewhat familiar?
1 star hangover *
No pain. No real feeling of illness.. Your sleep last night was a mere disco nap which is giving you a whole lot of misplaced energy. Be glad that you are able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 10 bottles of water and still feel this way. Even vegetarians are craving a Cheeseburger and a side of fries.

2 star hangover **
Slight headache. Don't feel sick, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay but you have the attention span and mental capacity of a stapler. The coffee you chug to try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is craving a full English breakfast. Last night has wreaked havoc on your bowels and even though you have a nice demeanour about the office, you are costing your employer valuable money because all you really can handle is aimlessly surfing the net and writing junk e-mails.

3 star hangover ***
Definite headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely a space cadet and so not productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the random gin shots you did with your alcoholic friends after the bouncer kicked you out at 1:45 a.m. Life would be better right now if you were in your bed with a dozen donuts and a litre of coke watching Good Morning with Richard and Judy. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 2 Sausage Rolls and a litre of diet coke - yet you haven't peed once.

4 star hangover ****
Your head is throbbing and you can't speak too quickly or else you might honk. You have lost the will to live. Your boss has already lambasted you for being late and has given you a lecture for reeking of booze. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you missed an oh-so crucial spot shaving, (girls, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars), your teeth have sweaters, your eyes look like one big vein
and your hair style makes you look like a reject from the class picture of Moss side secondary school circa 1976. You would give a weeks pay for one the following: 1. Home time, 2. A duvet and somewhere to be alone, or 3. A time machine so you could go back and NOT have gone out the night before.

5 star hangover (aka Dante's 4th Circle of Hell) *****
You have a second heartbeat in your head which is actually scaring the employee who sits next to you. Death seems pretty good right now. You can't focus as your eyes are scrunched up against the overpowering glare from your computer screen Rancid vodka vapour is seeping out of every pore, staining your shirt and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth, at least you think it's toothpaste crust. You don't give a damn either way. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva and your tongue is suffocating you. You'd cry but that would take the last of the moisture left in your body. Talking is not an option. Your boss doesn't even get mad at you and your co-workers think that your dog just died because you look so pathetic. You should have called in sick because all you can manage to do is breathe....very gently.
11 comments

Anonymous readerReport

2014-04-16 17:14:22
i was hammered so bad in all my holes and i barley noticed until they included the horse that 50 years ago still cant shit properly horny as shit but pain every time i move my pelvis

Anonymous readerReport

2014-01-11 16:38:55
had hangover so bad 5 star hangover loked like an angel bringing u to heaven and i still cant walk strait for the past 30 years

Anonymous readerReport

2014-01-10 16:47:47
5 bottles of vodka and still 1 star suck it just like my girlfrend before she fucked it

anonymous readerReport

2012-05-30 10:50:28
I do apologize for renpiylg in English, don't know Hebrew but could read all the info via Google Translate The problem with the length of the name is not due to the Icelandic naming regulation, it is due to the fact that the computer system that was installed many years ago didn't accept more than 31 characters. This made the government officials "ban" people to use above 31 characters. The only substitute is using only the first letter as Guy mentioned above.I know this sounds very stupid (it is) but this has been a problem for a long time but will be fixed soon since it is most likely illegal.Being Icelandic I do like the fact that we don't use family names. This gives each individual the option of becoming something by his own but not "because he belongs to the Jonsson family" or something like that. Family names where used in Iceland by rich immigrants that ruled a lot the business in Iceland before we became indepented. Those names still exist with some individuals but w

anonymous readerReport

2010-12-16 07:04:50
I'm 13 and reached 4 stars. Not as fun as you'd think

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