||It Started At The Pool - Part 2
||good story, suggest you separate the dialog more to make is easier to read.
||My Girlfriend's Daughter Part 2
||A little better on the separation but still a little hard to follow for us old guys. Keep writing.
||My Girlfriends Daughter
||Separate the story more to make it easier to read. Good story and nicely written.
||Teacher Take Student's Virginity
||I did not steal or copy any thing.
||A little choppy and moving from one position to the next was not smooth. Detail in some case very good. Keep writing and read others. There are some very good writers here, not me, and suggest you read their work. DO NOT STOP WRITING because of some negative comments. There are a lot of trolls here.
||black daddy roleplay
||Again us " for dialogue and ' for thoughts. Now write a new one.
||school bus ride
||It is a start but a little hard to follow.
Try using " marks for actual comment and ' for thoughts. When posting try to increase type size. Easier for us old dudes to read.
||My cousin Mark
||Well this is a great start to a very long story. Love the connection. Can use some work but still off to good start. Love your web sit too.
||for the anonymous coward chief is the defined as leader, chef is a head cook. I use word and a spell check is not alway perfect, I also use the thesaurus. I bet you like making your self important by putting other down. By the way idiot the email is available at my profile, but as you do not have the courage to post your name I doubt you have the courage to write me.
||Rachaels Story Chapter 1 Time stands still
||good story and nicely written, interesting POV
||good story, liked the idea
||The MILF Club - Part Two: The Education of Dennis (2)
||Interesting story and the way you approach the sex part.
||Good story and well written. Interesting way to separate the dialogue.
You got my vote. Sounds like it could be a real story.
||My sisters freinds...
||good story, forget the grammer comments this is not English class
||Deep Sleeper Ch. 01
||Good story and well written.
||Sharing a Room
||Like this one as well.
||Joey, the Next Door Neighbor
||Good story and well written. You have a talent and so keep writing.
I can see a sequel or just some more stories along the same line.
If you write more send me a note so I can read them.
||Abigail the Babysitter
||Good story keep writing. I want to see part 2
||The Cubbyhouse I: Playing Doctor
||Nice story and well written. I can see many chapters cuming.:-)
||My Wants, Needs and Desires
||Different way of telling story nice approach.
||Check the formate and grammar. That is my problem too.
The description of the massage I could feel, good writing.
Short and sexy.
||My First Encounter With My Cousin: The Weekend
||good story but need to separate the parts some hard to read on computer
||Our new cleaning girl
||Hot story, got to get a maid
||Wonderful story and well written, good description
||Sophie's Summer Holiday
||really like the story nicely written
||Well written but hate the ending, real ending but I hate sad endings
||Sophie's Summer Holiday
||good story and nicely written
||Teasing Daddy's Friend Until He Can't Take Anymore
||good story gave me some ideas
||And so it began...
||Interesting story and point of view. Hard to grasp some of the POV.
||Well written and seems to have some fact to it. The dialog is good.
||This is a very good story and I like the romance. Will read more of your work.
||The Beginning Ch 1
||Like the story line and easy to read. Helps with my writing.