| Date |
Story title |
Comment |
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| 2009-12-07 23:35:33 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
To the last two comments, Thank you for your honesty.
I understand your feelings, but stay with it because there is much more going on than what is obvious.
For instance, where does Joe get off being jealous after what he just did and has done in the past?
Also, Jeremy is only a "log" in Joe's mind, plus there are things we don't know yet.
I'll post the next chapter soon, but be warned, it sucks. Only one short sex act.
To really get this story it might need to be read without gaps between chapters and for that I am sorry. I hope when it finishes everyone who has been encouraging will say, "Oh, that's what it was all about." |
| 2009-12-05 12:02:45 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
Trust me, I don't let these comments go to my head, but they do push me on. Everything I have learned about writing has been done right here during these stories. I take your comments to motivate me, and I search grammar and writing sites for fee help. One day when I get a book published, there will have to be an acknowledgement to the named and unnamed readers on XNXX.
I'll also have to give a big flip of the bird to those unnamed teachers who humiliated that little boy with a learning disability and drove him away from anything related to literature for decades. |
| 2009-12-04 02:06:28 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
anon
No he didn't. She gave him a bj on two occasions but not sex. |
| 2009-12-03 23:25:36 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
"i dont like this chapter. too much confliction. the idea of cindy bringing peace to joe's life for a moment was better."
Thanks for your honest opinion. I actually agree. I shed a few tears writing it, but it was needed. I hope it helps me get to the end with the impact I was hoping for. It would have been a great love story written without the conflict. Maybe the next one will be.
Thanks for taking the time to comment. These help me. |
| 2009-12-03 18:20:50 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
"U as the Investigative Counsellor working to make sense of this Dysfunctional Jungle."
Yes, my exact thinking when I asked the question.
"Including behavioural twists and dependencies. I would like to think this would reflect some research of the REAL experiences of adult survivors of such abuse/mis-socialisation."
You are on to something here and although I don't think this is the platform for something as profound as you propose, I hope the ending doesn't just mark the close of this story. The research was lived more than studied. Thank you for your comments. They were beyond my expectations. |
| 2009-12-03 12:55:33 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
It is so great to see your feedback. Thank You. Yes there will be more chapters, but will be wrapping up in the next few.
Let me ask those of you who have followed this a question, do you think this story would have been better in the third person? If I knew it was going to grow so far, I would have used third person. Simply, because it's much easier to write third person. Has first person added to the story?
I know I've gotten some answers to this, but interest in other's thoughts. |
| 2009-12-02 16:02:30 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
2009-12-02 14:53:37
No she wasn't suppose to fuck him!!!
I know, I hated that too. Almost couldn't bring myself to it. But, it was a necessary evil in the life of this troubled girl.
I love all the positive comments and even the ones not positive when they help. What sucks is that many people just scroll down and click the negative button without regard for anything except their selfish motives. Most will not know what I mean, but those who do, shame on you.
Hey, any thoughts on the first person third person question? I'm looking for help. I'm not a writer so I need your help. |
| 2009-12-02 13:48:15 |
Finding Krissy |
Hey,
I just posted a reply to your earlier post. Some good news from the admin. I don't have time to read this right now, but I'll come back to it. Looks like some format issue. If you have any question don't hesitate to ask. PM me if you need to. |
| 2009-12-02 13:28:52 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XV |
It is so great to see your feedback. Thank You.
Let me ask those of you who have followed this a question, do you think this story would have been better in the third person? If I knew it was going to grow so far, I would have done it that way. Simply, because it's much easier to write third person. Has first person added to the story?
I love the Winn-Dixie character Jessy Jay. She is an actual girl who I met in Winn-Dixie. No, I am not the guy in that story. As much as I love her and the story, I promised myself I'd finish this one up first. I have to go away for what could end up being forever in the world of sites like this. That will be in four or five weeks, I think. So, I cannot promise anything about that story other than I'd like to. I am sorry if I end up not because it was wrong to start and leave hanging. |
| 2009-11-28 10:32:26 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XII |
j.p.31 Click on my user name and you'll get the list. Or look under the long list of stories. |
| 2009-11-24 20:22:16 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIV |
Thanks for saying so! I am trying as hard as I can to make this good. Even though it was originally a two part story.
I'm sorry the plot has become more convoluted than ever, and the time between chapters makes it hard to follow. I'll try and just wrap the whole thing up this week so everyone will know where this is going.
Thank you to those who have stayed with it all this time.
Those who don't like it enough to click negative, please take a second to say why. It might help me write something you will like later. Thanks
|
| 2009-11-22 18:00:14 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIV |
Thanks for saying so! I am trying as hard as I can to make this good. Even though it was originally a two part story.
I'm sorry the plot has become more convoluted than ever, and the time between chapters makes it hard to follow. I'll try and just wrap the whole thing up this week so everyone will know where this is going.
Thank you to those who have stayed with it all this time.
Those who don't like it enough to click negative, please take a second to say why. It might help me write something you will like later. Thanks
|
| 2009-11-21 22:07:18 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIV |
Thanks for saying so. It's too much for sure, but I am trying as hard as I can to make this good. Even though it was originally a two part story.
I'm sorry the plot has become more convoluted than ever, and the time between chapters makes it hard to follow. I'll try and just wrap the whole thing up this week so everyone will know where this is going.
Thank you to those who have stayed with it all this time.
Those who don't like it enough to click negative, please take a second to say why. It might help me write something you will like later. Thanks |
| 2009-11-18 10:14:22 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
Interesting question about the brother. I posted the next chapter for validation, so in two to three days it will show up. Read it and I think it will answer your question. Let me know.
On the next chapter, I ended up having to rush because I have a bunch of stuff happening, and I didn't want to keep it waiting. I was proofreading it until 2am, so I say sorry in advance for the sort comings. |
| 2009-11-17 10:52:31 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
Thank you reader. "Fairly well" is not my goal so feel free to send me a message and make suggestions or point out my mistakes. |
| 2009-11-11 23:49:45 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
Hey, I understand that everyone is not going to like this story. That's fine. However, I put in a ton of effort into making it interesting, sexy and well written. So, if you are going to click the negative button, can you please let me know what could make it better?
Was it the story you didn't like?
Was it the topic? Length? Details? Or, you just don't like my stories?
Whatever it is, take a few seconds and tell me, so I can either improve or just stop wasting my time.
Thank you.
|
| 2009-11-09 08:48:23 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
The comments are great, and greatly appreciated. Keep them coming. But, I'm going to ask this again because I also want to know what is not liked:
Hey, I understand that everyone is not going to like this story. That's fine. If you are going to click the negative button, can you please let me know what could make it better? What didn't you like?
Was it the story you didn't like?
Was it the topic? Length? Details? Or, you just don't like my stories?
Whatever it is, take a few seconds and tell me.
Thank you.
|
| 2009-11-08 22:28:55 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
Thank you. That is why I added the warning at the top. I want people to know what they are getting before they start. They should leave if they aren't looking for a story with much detail.
I just want to know why the negative votes, so I know if I can improve something. I know some are probably people who just want to vote that way, but there must be some who have a reason. |
| 2009-11-08 21:06:56 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XIII |
Hey, I understand that everyone is not going to like this story. That's fine. However, I put in a ton of effort into making it interesting, sexy and well written. So, if you are going to click the negative button, can you please let me know what could make it better?
Was it the story you didn't like?
Was it the topic? Length? Details? Or, you just don't like my stories?
Whatever it is, take a few seconds and tell me, so I can either improve or just stop wasting my time.
Thank you. |
| 2009-11-06 12:17:41 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XII |
Thank you, that's encouraging. Keep visiting the site anyway, but I'll tell you this, the next part will get posted today. But, it takes a few days to get validated.
For the reader who said it's getting confusing, it gets worse. Sorry but I can't keep coming up with different opportunities for this one to fuck that one and so on. It needed a twisted plot to make it have some other value. |
| 2009-11-03 16:05:37 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part X |
anon,
Sorry you're disappointed. If you have been following this story you know I had to toss the actual facts a long time ago to keep it going. Those facts, even then were loosely being followed.
The story is about conflict within the characters. Joe, especially. When I was his age, I'm sorry to say, my dick normally spoke louder than my heart and often left me with regrets. Anyone else have that problem? This is an exaggerated story about that. |
| 2009-11-03 10:40:13 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XII |
"I just think it's wrong for Susan to do that to Joe"
What do you mean, tell him about her parents or mess with his head with Jasmin? |
| 2009-11-01 08:44:46 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XII |
Redlust,
You nailed it. I was dropping hints but didn't want it to be obvious. PM me if you have anymore. Now that the story has diverted so far from the actual facts, I can make anything happen. I hope to post the next chapter in the next day or two. I know this is hard to believe, but I spend anywhere from 20 to 30 hours on each chapter, start to finish. I type slower than slow, and I have to proof read them at least four times and yes, still miss shit. Thank you. |
| 2009-10-31 22:23:48 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XII |
Stop reading them, jackass! Are you so stupid you read things you don't like? |
| 2009-10-29 16:49:36 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part XI |
I appreciate what you just said, even about the grammar and spelling. If you care to I am happy to have you tell me what the problems are, so I'll be aware. I'm not a writer, or even very good at English. But, I try to be correct and make each storya good story.
I wish people who weren't interested in a story would go read one of the fuck stories and not waste time reading this story. I bust my ass to make this good for everyone, but that is not going to happen. If I do something to rate a negative vote, please tell me what it is, so I will know if I need to improve something, or just know that some people want to give you a thumbs down. I can't make the story good for everybody, but I want to do my best. |
| 2009-10-25 20:18:24 |
|
It's sad that a writer has to write every story to satisfy everybody! No, that's not going to happen. That's why there are many different writers writing different types of stories. And, we even have categories to choose from, so we don't have to read something we aren't interested in, to find out what it's about.
Just keep writing whatever you feel like. You write well, even when it's off your normal style.
I hate some of the stories on this site. Even, some that are mine. But, this one is good.
BiStander |
| 2009-10-25 15:06:45 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part X |
Chapter XI is now online. You might have to look for it because there are a lot of well rated stories on the first page.
In caseyou don't know, you can always click a users name and it takes you to their story list when you are in the stories. In the forum you go to there profile, but can't get to their stories from there.
BiStander |
| 2009-10-23 19:06:21 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part X |
Thanks, it's good to be back.
It's on the way:
My Neighbor's Incest Part XI 2009-10-22 16:16:06 Validating... |
| 2009-10-23 13:21:33 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part X |
Da, I meant she can't help herself.
The next chapter is already waiting for validation. I promise I'll keep knocking them out.
BiStander |
| 2009-10-23 13:05:07 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part X |
hotoldmanq
Yup, it sure does. But it's more her conflict with who she really is and she can help herself.
BiStander |
| 2009-10-15 00:21:18 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part IX |
More chapters are on the way. I have been gone way longer than I expected. I'll explain later. I know most of the followers of this story have probably given up, but I'll add what I got anyway.
For the below comment, a true story doesn't have to be my truth. This one started out based on my truth but has had a bunch added to keep it going. I didn't want three parts in the true story and the rest in fiction. |
| 2009-07-25 20:17:06 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VIII |
Aside from it being a 14 year old boy making the correction,
Remember, prepositions govern the objective case. Therefore, the word 'I' must change to 'me' when it is the object of a preposition (i.e., follows it).
Thanks for enjoying the story and don't hesitate to point out mistakes. |
| 2009-07-24 09:20:15 |
Football Fantasy Part 1 |
Work on spacing, paragraphs and story development. This is more like a short fantasy than a story, which is not bad, but if you want to write stories you need to spend more time working on it.
Bistander
|
| 2009-07-21 17:24:53 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VII |
just a question, Around what part do you think this series will end?
When do you want it to end? I don't know what the ending is, so I'm not sure. I want it to end soon. |
| 2009-07-17 20:32:19 |
Quieting the Storms for Katie |
"If you wanted to tell a story of young teen girls, why would you give one huge tits that would make her look older? I don't get it"
Hum, I don't know. But leave your username and next time I'll consult you before I write a story about my fantasy. |
| 2009-07-16 08:13:45 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VII |
unoimgood
Sorry, but I have other things and recently had writers block really bad on this one. Part VIII will be right arond the corner. Part VIIII, no promises.
To those missing the incest. Just because Joe has been getting most of the action doesn't mean that's all there is. You can't have everything in every part. Who knows what will happen at Thanksgiving? |
| 2009-07-15 17:11:27 |
Quieting the Storms for Katie |
livestrong_eagle
Good input. I appreciate it when someone takes the time to say something positive. This story was written more to get that girl out of my head, than anything else. When I started all I had was her in the store. Everything else came as I went, so it's all over. I hid all the details in the story. I was wondering how people would react to the different flash backs. Thanks for the advice. It helped. |
| 2009-07-14 21:02:12 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VII |
So sorry for the delay. I have really had to stretch to keep this going. The good news in part VIII is already finished!
I'll post it tomorrow and then in about five days it will be up. After that, I'm not sure how far I can keep this going. Anyone want to take it?
BiStander |
| 2009-07-14 20:47:18 |
Quieting the Storms for Katie |
V.A.
I have no idea. That's not even a word even though it passes the spell checker! You know what I meant. Sodomy-Sexual activity. Whatever. Some times I pluck words out of my horny mind while I'm picturing the event. So what if they don't make sense. That's for the comment. |
| 2009-06-30 00:30:33 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI (revised) |
Hum, maybe I was there?
I hope you continue to enjoy. I have a few strands of truth left to base the story on, so I hope it can continue to make you feel that way. |
| 2009-06-29 17:45:42 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI (revised) |
I'm working on it, but I don't want it to suck, so it's taking a long time. I got side tracked with Winn Dixie and a tale of a girl buring for her boyfriend's sister. I hope to finish one of them this week, just not sure which.
Keep watching. |
| 2009-06-28 15:29:50 |
Finding a treasure at Winn-Dixie |
"Fruit of the Loops".
Dude, I am sorry. I see when I read stories how these things jump out at me. I read my stories so many times my brain just goes right past that stuff. I'll keep trying to not have those things happen.
Thanks all for the kind words and for pointing out the errors. That helps.
I'm working on part two. Also on part VII of the other story.
BiStander |
| 2009-06-23 22:59:33 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI (revised) |
Yes, there is more coming. Sorry it's been so long, I got caught up in Win-Dixie, and reading some other good stories on this site.
I really want to work on this one, I miss my first love, Susan. |
| 2009-06-23 19:06:22 |
Finding a treasure at Winn-Dixie |
Actually, I find it easy to ignore those like anonymous. Tenth grader looking for attention, that's all.
It bothers when I make mistakes, so feel free to be constructive. I can hopefully not make the same often. |
| 2009-06-22 13:06:58 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI (revised) |
180boi, Nothing really that makes it worth reading again. If the SN and JM didn't bother you, just wait for VII. I thought I changed more, but my brain was confused. I probably should have just left well enough alone, but I had to have it fixed. I still have not received one reply from the admin. |
| 2009-06-21 19:57:01 |
Finding a treasure at Winn-Dixie |
It was Teen Male/Female. There is no category for teen Male/pre-teen female, so that is what you get.
I suck at comma for sure. Any you feel like pointing out, I will take into my brain and use later. I actually have software that is supposed to help me, but it doesn't.
Didn't anyone notice I used isle and not aisle? |
| 2009-06-20 09:35:59 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
Part VI (Revised) is online. It corrects the SN and JM and some type-os in the version I first posted. |
| 2009-06-17 13:29:36 |
My Neighbors, The Twins |
They didn't wait two hours before going in the pool!
Please add a blank line between paragraphs to help my eyes.
It was good.
If you enjoy writing it, then write on, and don't worry about the nameless asses who feel a need to be critical and even mean. |
| 2009-06-17 13:04:32 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI |
How could someone get so worked up over something they chose to read. If you're going to be a childish fool, at least leave your username, so I can see all your great stories, that you have spent hours working on. |
| 2009-06-16 12:46:58 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
Hello again,
If you liked this story and are going to read part 6, please make sure you read the one with (revised) at the end of the title.
It should be on line in the next two or three days.
Thanks |
| 2009-06-14 16:47:53 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI |
I explained several times why the SN and JM. Read the comments below and on the previous chapter. I still have not heard back from the admin after a week. I really want to post the correct version.
Glad some of you have been able to overlook my screw up. |
| 2009-06-13 11:09:42 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI |
Thanks for saying so. Check back if the new version gets up here, because while I had time, I reworked the beginning to better describe Joe's conflict, and tuned up some other parts. If you know some place I can post it right away, let me know and I'll do it for you.
Does anyone who has been on this site for a while, know why there is a 4 or 5 day waiting period for a story to get posted? It's obviously an automated process, and they don't seem to reject many stories, so why 5 days? |
| 2009-06-13 11:00:01 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
Be prepared:
If you liked this and plan to move on to Part 6, I posted the edit version. You will have to endure some type'os and you will see SN and JM in many cases for Susan and Jasmin. If this is going to bother you, then wait for the new version to get up there. I'll post a new message here when it does.
Other than the above mentioned, the correct version is the same, with some minor paragraph reworks at the beginning.
**Sorry I made a bone head move, and for 5 days have been trying to get it undone, but the admin must be on vacation this week. |
| 2009-06-12 23:16:48 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part VI |
I wish I knew someway to let people know before they read this, but I have sent several PM's and e-mails to the admin, all week, but nothing. It's bad enough it takes 5 days to get the story posted, but if you need to make a change, it's murder.
I don't know how I pasted the wrong text, but I did. I hate making mistakes more than you know.
I will not let it happen again. |
| 2009-06-10 22:41:36 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
If you are looking for part VI, it is on the way. I posted it Monday but then realized I posted the wrong version. I am trying to get the admin, since yesterday to stop the validate process. Nothing yet. I hope to be able to repost it soon.
If for some reason you see part VI and it has typeo's and SN, JM instead of Susan and Jasmin. Sorry I screwed up. Hopefully it will get fixed first. |
| 2009-06-05 19:33:29 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
Thanks for taking the time to read these, and vote for them. I think that's why they have stayed high, because you'll take the time to click the vote button.
I can promise, I haven't figured out how to vote twice. I tried to see if it could be done, but no luck. Not that I would care to. It's not like anyone pays me for this! |
| 2009-06-03 16:35:19 |
My Neighbor's Incest Part V |
"Could you rename the titles so they happen in the correct order? Thanks!"
I messed up the name of part three and requested to have it renamed two weeks ago, but it hasn't happened. It's not easy to get changes. Sorry. |
| 2009-05-28 12:43:28 |
My Neighbor's Incest part III |
Dude, Get a grip on yourself. If I had that much time, I'd spend it making the stories even better. Also, I'd get my other stories out of the 70% range.
Thanks for wasting your time reading it, though.
I'm almost done with this one, maybe you can take it over and do it justice.
Have a nice day. |
| 2009-05-26 20:39:58 |
My Neighor's Incest IV |
Part V is on the way, but you'll have to go back and review part III when it comes on line again. The plot could not continue past III without a change. Just pretend it was a day dream when Susan lost it, and read part V. Hopefully, it will be worth all the work I did to make it happen. I was going to let it die at the end of III.
Peace. |
| 2009-05-22 18:42:05 |
My Neighor's Incest IV |
"Unknow
2009-05-22 12:34:09 He took her virginity in the last story....
Also, the sunscreen he'd been rubbing his junk in would be like hell in her ass, and taste bad. Details, man. "
Have you ever tried the sunscreen thing? |
| 2009-05-04 17:15:28 |
My Neighor's Incest |
I don't get it. 33,453 reads, but only 665 votes? Is it that hard to click the button?
Also, for you expert writers who see mistakes, point them out, because I obviously missed them and then maybe I will not make the same one again. Also include your username so I can see your stories. Thanks.
I spend way too much time on these for a below 80% rating.
Do you think there should be a 1 star to 5 star rating system? The other site I post on has that. That way it's not good or bad, only.
Part two is waiting validate, and part three is being reviewed. |
| 2009-05-01 10:54:38 |
My Neighor's Incest |
Keep looking for part two. It takes 4 or 5 days to get a story posted, plus I have to really proof read it. I noticed mistakes here just scanning it. I don't know how I miss them. Probably because I read it 50 times writing it and I read right over them. |
| 2009-04-28 23:49:17 |
My Niece the troublemaker - Ch. 1 |
I made that previous comment and then realized I was logged out while reading the story. Why do you get logged out? |
| 2009-04-28 12:49:41 |
April's Revenge |
A good story, thanks, but a better knowledge of grammar and a thorough proofreading would have improved it greatly.
Some comments, if I may. gapping asshole gaping asshole ? The possessive of my body is my bodys not bodies; the latter is the plural. its is the contraction of it is; its is the possessive case. started their decent descent? call the shoots?.
Good calls and you're right. Want to proof read? PM me. |
| 2009-04-22 14:56:11 |
Obsessed with doing myself |
Honestly that was based on something that really happened to me and it never happened again, so I'd have to make something up for you. I might. |